- What the hell did I just sit on?
- Where is it? Where's my harmonica?
It's not here!
(upbeat music)
- You asked for it,
and I'm delivering more educational reactions
to one of your faves
Family Guy number four coming at you hot.
But before we get into it,
if you're new to my channel, welcome.
My name is Dr. Jordan Wagner. I'm an emergency room doc.
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and other stuff that you see here on this channel,
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All right, let's dive right in.
- You know what? Hang on.
I left my harmonica in the tub.
- I think Peter's in there taking a bath.
- [Peter] Ah! Son of a bitch!
- What the hell did I just sit on?
- Where is it? Where's my harmonica?
It's not here!
- Peter, have you seen Stewie's harmonica?
It was in the tub. - Of course.
- Oh my God. It was in the tub...
And now it's in my butt!
- You know how many times
we get in the emergency department
somebody comes in and they "sat on something"
and it went up into a certain "area"?
It's pretty hard just to sit on something.
You need to be able to relax the muscle.
The sphincter, which is the muscle around your butthole,
it's tight.
- Stewie, daddy needs your tiny hands
for a very special project.
(Jordan laughs)
- Tiny hands. Oh my gosh!
You can attempt to get it out. It is very painful.
Sometimes you can get it out in the emergency department.
Sometimes you actually have to go to the operating room.
At the hospital. There's the harmonica.
We do get x-rays looking for alignment,
looking to see how far up it is,
with the orientation, those sorts of things.
If it's too far up
to where you can't reach it with your hand,
you have to go to the operating room.
Or worst case, they have to actually open you up.
- Can we address my husband's situation?
- Well, the harmonica's up there pretty good.
Unfortunately, removing it
would require a very expensive surgery
that's not covered by your TGI Friday's gift card.
(harmonica plays) - Oh my gosh.
Potentially an emergency
because of risk of bowel perforation,
but a harmonica could get snagged, it can cut.
- I don't know. (sniffs)
Suddenly it smells like John Popper in here.
- That was me! I got musical farts!
(harmonica plays)
(giggles) Holy crap! - Holy crap!
- I will not allow this opportunity to go to waste.
- Don't put anything up there,
like I always say, without a string or a big flange.
- We should start by checking your reflexes.
(Dr. Hartman screams) (Peter starts)
(Jordan laughs)
- That is not what you mean by checking your reflexes, okay?
Checking your reflexes means your DTRs,
your deep tendon reflexes.
That's when the doctor uses the hammer.
All the classic places, like the knee, the patella tendon.
You can even do it on the forearm for the wrist as well,
but not just trying to scare somebody.
- You gotta help me. My arm really hurts.
It all started after I got a chainsaw.
- Hmm, is that right?
Well, it sounds to me like you may have chainsaw elbow.
- Okay, no. There's no such thing as chainsaw elbow.
What they're describing most likely is tennis elbow
or golfer's elbow, which is medial or lateral epicondylitis,
which is just inflammation of the tendons
in those anatomical positions.
- Chainsaw elbow?
- So how much synthetic opioid do you need?
- That is so messed up!
Basically, the best medication for this
would be an anti-inflammatory, which is Ibuprofen.
Opiates in this setting just covers up the pain
and actually doesn't fix the problem.
- I'm trying to prescribe enough to earn a fanny pack.
- I don't have any specific medication brand,
generic versus trade.
I think the only thing nowadays
that pharmaceutical companies actually end up doing
is educational teachings
with maybe a dinner or something like that.
- Have you ever had a chiropractic adjustment?
- What's that?
- It's a procedure
where a guy who couldn't get into medical school
tries to rip your head off.
(dramatic music) (Jordan gasps)
- That's messed up!
So, chiropractors are their own specialty.
They not just crack or realign people.
They also do wellness and health optimization.
They go to school for a long time as well.
They chose this career.
They didn't "not make it into med school."
- It's kind of like the polar express.
- Let's do it!
- Okay, I'll give it a shot.
But this type of thing is usually done in strip malls
next to a Little Caesar's.
- Unless he was trained on a separate course
that he took on his own,
he shouldn't be doing this.
He needs to know these techniques.
We spend many, many, many hours learning how to do this.
Oh, gosh. Oh my gosh.
Oh, that's not how you do that.
Horrible.
(Peter gasps)
- Holy crap. What happened?
- Well, I think we simply found your true height.
(Jordan laughs)
- Okay.
So you can actually do cervical decompression
basically by pulling on somebody's head, by lengthening it.
So it takes some of the pressure off
where the nerves are coming out,
which could be causing compression of the nerve,
which then can be causing symptoms to your extremities
and your pain and that sort of thing.
- I've got you now, Bat Damon.
(Jordan laughs)
- Okay.
- So bats could carry rabies, okay?
And their bite is so sharp
that you may not even notice it if you're sleeping.
(bat squeaking) - Ah! Ah! What is it?
(Peter yells)
- Oh!
There's always the potential that they might have bit you.
The concern though is, it could...
And if you get rabies, it's pretty much deadly.
What ends up happening
is you would go to the emergency department.
And if you know where you got bit,
you can get immunoglobulin to protect you.
And then you would also get the rabies vaccine.
- Peter, what the hell did you do to Stewie's hand?
It could be broken! - Oh, no!
- I didn't mean to!
It's just, sometimes I don't think before I act.
- Stewie needs an x-ray of his hand
to see if there's a fracture.
And then we did see some blood,
so is there a laceration that needs to be repaired?
- Good news. Stewie's hand looks fine.
- Oh, hey. High five.
- And in kids, depending on their age,
not all of their joints are totally formed.
So there's a lot of cartilage that is still there
that you can't see on an x-ray
that it will future form into a bone.
- Stewie hasn't had his vaccinations yet.
Should we take care of that?
- Well, I suppose so.
- Oh, but first I'm required to have you read this pamphlet
about the risks of vaccinations.
- Possible side effects:
fever, severe allergic reaction, muscle and joint pain.
Wait, this can't be right.
- A lot of good things about vaccines.
Vaccines are not without risk, okay?
There's always a chance of something happening.
Every human is different.
We all have potential different reactions.
But risk versus benefit.
- Hey man, how many questions your lady ask?
- Oh, geez.
- A million.
- I don't remember having to read any of this
when Chris and Meg had their vaccinations.
- Well, that was before internet chat rooms
made everybody an expert.
- Wow, okay.
So that was a big dive into vaccinations,
especially now, what's going on in the world.
So vaccinations are a good thing.
Vaccines have been developed
to help eradicate a lot of different viral issues
that we've had in the past.
- What are you boys doing up there? Get off the roof!
- Go back in the house, Lois. We're being "Jackass."
Okay, ready? - All right, we're rolling.
- I'm Peter Griffin, and this is shopping cart...
Roof... Roof shopping cart.
- Nice.
- Okay, go!
- Oh!
- Oh, broken back.
Oh!
- God, are you okay?
- I don't know. I don't know.
What does it look like? What do I do?
- Don't do anything!
- What is that? I feel something!
- That's your neck!
- Fine, dude.
- Oh my gosh.
- You picked up a bunch of notches.
- I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared.
- Upper cervicals typically have to do
with your arms, right, and your neck.
Both are moving. They're moving well.
Probably hasn't caused any neurologic problems.
It's more structural problems.
This is hilarious.
I've obviously never seen this
unless the head is decapitated off.
It almost looks like an internal type decapitation.
Oh! And he just vomited everywhere!
So gross.
Pain, anxiety. These things can cause vomiting.
You see it very often.
- Does this get fixed with ice or heat?
- Ice now, heat later.
- That's true. Ice or heat, right?
So in this circumstance though, heat or ice,
drop both and get to the hospital.
Get to the emergency department ASAP.
Like, 911. Get in a car ASAP.
And get seen immediately.
You need a neurosurgeon. You need an orthopedic surgeon.
You need a trauma surgeon. You need an ER doctor.
All of these docs will show up and really work together
to figure out how we're going to put this neck back together
and make sure that there's no other major injury
that's going on.
- What are you, nuts? I got no special talents.
What can I do that nobody else does?
- Well, you just ate my tip.
- I got it!
- What is he gonna do? What is he gonna do?
(alarm beeps)
All right.
- Oh my God, Lois! I can't see!
- Uh-oh.
So a lot of times when I've seen patients
where they literally just can't see,
it's actually due to diabetes or sometimes brain tumors.
So definitely needs to be seen.
- [Dr. Hartman] Uh, how about now?
- Nope. Nothing.
- Well, that makes me feel much better.
You can't see the spaceship either.
My cousin Marshall insists if you look past the picture,
you can see a-
- Normally you would use an eye chart,
but even then,
if you can't see the letters in the eye chart,
then you use big objects.
Then you check if you can see waving objects.
And then, can you see light or not?
- Can you please just tell us what's wrong with my husband?
- Oh, yes.
Well, you see,
after ingesting such a large number of metal coins,
Mr. Griffin appears to have succumbed to nickel poisoning,
causing him to lose his sight.
- Oh my God, Lois. I'm blind as a bat!
I can't see a damn thing!
- The likelihood that the nickel from the nickel
is causing blindness is pretty rare.
It causes a lot of other things.
More GI symptoms, skin symptoms,
maybe some neurologic things,
but it doesn't typically cause eye blindness.
Some other toxicities could.
Thank you so much for watching.
I love this. This was awesome.
Let me know in the comments
what other things you want me to react to,
what other scenes.
As always, make sure you subscribe
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and check out my Doctor Reaction series right here
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Thank you so much for watching and stay healthy, my friends.
(upbeat music)