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Sometimes a breakup
is a blessing in disguise.
Listen,
you came to this video because you’re struggling.
You’re struggling with the fact that
you’re no longer with this individual
that you love, and truly cared about.
You became so accustomed
to having them in your life
and now you’re wondering, how?
How do you get over this?
How do you get to a point
where you’re feeling so much better,
and you’re free
from that anguish, and heaviness,
that comes from
no longer being with them?
Well,
the first step
is to understand that
you needed to be away from them right now.
Now, I know that sounds crazy
and you may have a very hard time
wrapping your head around that.
The reality is that the relationship
ended for a reason.
Whether it was toxic behavior,
whether it was that person
or you not being truly ready
for that relationship,
and where it could go, or should go,
or maybe there are some things that you
both needed to accomplish in your life.
And you weren’t doing it
because you became so consumed
with this individual, this relationship
that it was holding you back from your purpose.
Holding you back
from achieving great things.
Now, understand something.
This doesn’t mean things can’t
one day work out between you and that individual.
If.
If it is truly the person you are
best to be with,
however,
you still have to make sure
that you are getting yourself ready
and on the right track
for whatever is supposed to come in your life.
Whether that’s them coming back
or that something with your career,
something in your spiritual walk,
whatever it is.
Shift your focus,
shift it back to you
and what do you need to be doing.
Also in helping you get
over this individual.
Stop trying to fight how you feel.
One of the reasons why we prolong
our attachment and our feelings for someone
is because we’re so busy
trying to fight it.
It’s almost like being in quicksand -
the more you fight
the worse you make it -
the deeper you’re sinking in.
Don’t fight it.
If you love them you love them.
If you care about them you care about them.
Even if you’re going through this experience of
you’re mad because you still feel for them.
Despite them possibly
doing something wrong to you.
Regardless of that,
don’t try to fight how you feel.
Flow with your feelings.
That doesn’t mean act on them -
meaning that doesn’t mean call them right now.
Doesn’t mean try to get back with them right now.
It just means accept that’s how you feel
but stay focused on what you need to do.
Also.
You could say number three on this list
is you need to heal.
If you want to get over someone
then you have to heal from this relationship.
Now, what I explained to you just now
about recognizing that this was necessary,
recognizing that you don’t need to fight your feelings.
These things will help in the healing process
but some of the things also included are;
forgiveness.
Forgiving yourself.
You might be holding on to
a mistake that you made in the situation
that led to the breakup,
and you keep beating yourself up.
All you’re doing is making it worse
but listen you’re human.
We all make mistakes
and you can’t continue to dwell on that.
you have to accept that what’s done is done,
and you have to learn from it,
and move forward.
Or it may be forgiving them.
You’re holding on to what they did to you
and you’re having a hard time
letting that go,
letting that betrayal go,
letting that disappointment go.
Again, you have to forgive
because forgiveness is your freedom.
Now there’s more to healing than that
so I have it all laid out in my book,
"Finding Love After A Heartbreak."
Be sure to check it out.
You can click the link in the
description and you can click it or
or click it in the comment section.
Be sure to
walk through the healing process.
Do the steps
and get yourself to a better place.
Let me tell you one quick
thing about how not to try to get over somebody,
and that is by getting under someone else.
See you hear that advice a lot.
People tell you just go,
deal with someone else
and go entertain yourself.
Listen,
you’re only creating more problems.
You’re just trying to add
a distraction to your life
that would allow you to take mind
off that last person,
but now, you are bringing this new person
into your web of dysfunction.
You’re going to now, eventually,
probably hurt them.
You can cause greater damage to yourself
or create unnecessary drama
because you got involved
when you weren’t ready for that right now.
You’re not there emotionally.
Take this time for yourself.
It’s okay to be alone,
it’s okay to be single.
Take this time for your personal growth,
for your healing,
and to set yourself up
for so much better.
I want to throw one more thing at you.
One more thing I want you to understand.
Sometimes
you weren’t really in love
you just had an unhealthy attachment.
Now, I know you may not want to
hear that right now.
You may not agree with me right now.
You might not be able to see
or understand what I’m saying.
Please,
know that if you came into that relationship
unhealed,
and you had some dysfunction you never cleared out.
Then there’s a very likely chance
that you latched onto that last individual
out of the dysfunction.
Therefore, it became an unhealthy attachment.
So your struggle right now
is because you’ve had to detach from this person
who in some ways was
comfortable to be with,
or it may be easier for you
in your mind.
In reality, you were masking the deeper issue.
Again,
you not being with them right now
is a blessing because
now, you can really dig deep,
find out what the issues are.
Address them, correct them,
and make sure going forward
you end up with the right person,
and you’re able to have a healthy
and successful relationship.
Those are some quick tips
on how to get over someone.
I know it’s easier said than done
and I know there’s a lot of work to be done
in what I laid out for you.
However, it’s going to be worth it.
You can do it.
You will overcome this,
and I’ll pray that you are going to
get the healing that you deserve.
Again, be sure to subscribe to my channel.
Leave a comment below
and don’t forget to get your copy of
"Finding Love After A Heartbreak".
I promise it's going to give you the help you need.
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