WAZAAAA!!!
Seriously, man, 9 years ago.
9?
Oh, okay.
Hi, what’s up?
Not much.
You?
I feel woozy.
Really?
How come?
Yeah, well, um...
Man, let’s cut to the chase, did you eat something again?
Yeah What?
Nothing What?!
Nothing Mushrooms?
Gosh, who do you think I am.
No A rocket?
A moon?
A planet?
A star?
Uh-huh.
A star.
Jeez.
Haven’t you had enough last time?
I have no idea where you fit all the stuff in.
So, I was minding my own business, just, you know, was about to watch the planet parade.
When you know, out of nowhere, this star came rushing.
And?
Did you jump on it?
Can’t you control yourself but at all?
I sure can.
But not that time.
Yeah, like you’re so capable of change.
You know, I don’t give a tiny rat’s ass about your opinion.
You’re not a saint too, whitey!
Okay, tell me more about that poor star.
It was so shiny!
So white and big.
I could feel its hydrogen vibrating and radiating.
And helium.
Yeah, that too.
So, what happened next?
Nothing, I just swallowed it.
You will never understand what others feel when they are inside me.
Nobody can.
The shiny star disintegrated and now I feel full and kind of hangover.
Hangover over a star?
Yep.
Cool story, bro.
Tell it again.
Why?
Because it’s so boring I might fall asleep while you babbling about your star sickness
and uncontrollable desire to consume everything that passes too close to you.
Not to me!
To my event horizon.
Haven’t you seen Interstellar?
Or are you just jealous that they didn’t care to invite you?
I did.
I still don’t believe they let you in without an audition.
It’s because I don’t need to read the lines, you jerk.
Fine, you’re a celebrity now.
Maybe someday, when I care a bit more about it, I’ll ask for your autograph.
Or even to share yet another star with me over lunch.
So, how are things with you?
More space matter that you refuse to be friends with for no apparent reason?
No Why?
I have my reasons.
Man, you need to relax.
You know, relaaaaax.
I’m cool.
That I know.
I’m talking about interacting with the rest of your interstellar environment.
You let no one touch you.
So?
What do you mean, so?
You need someone.
No, I don’t.
Leave me alone about it.
Why?
I’m fine.
I am not lonely, I don’t need anyone.
I am not like you.
I don’t need to destroy stuff just to suck on that hydrogen-helium tit of the universe.
Yeah, you do.
You can’t say you don’t like it before you try it.
Try it.
No.
Do it No.
Why?
What could possibly go wrong?
Gosh, I don’t know.
How about the universe would implode, the dark matter will become visible to everyone,
YOU will become visible.
I don’t need all that.
I’m fine on my own.
Drop it.
Okay.
Did you hear anything about the Big Brother yet?
Don’t call him that.
He’s got a normal name The Great Attractor?
I know, but it doesn’t sound that cool, does it?
Dude, we’re not kids with sticks to give each other names.
Okaaaay, dork.
What did you call me?
I said don’t...
use stupid names.
Right.
The Great Attractor appears.
‘ello, suckers!
Nice to see you too (sarcastic tone).
Maybe it was not a bad idea to use names with this one (mumbling)
Whatcha doin’?
Not much, I was just telling..(gets interrupted) Yeah-yeah, good story.
I’m bored.
Let’s go find the guys and just, you know, chill.
I don’t feel like going to anywhere, leave me alone.
Oh, mr. Whitey is cocky again.
What about you, Blackie?
I’ll pass.
Thanks.
Well, I have no other choice but take you both with me.
Oh, what?
Are you going to do what?
Drag us?
You bet I will.
If only you can explain how I can do it, I’ll let you both go.
But no one can!
Let me gooo!
I said, explain how I attract everything and I’ll let you go!
You can even ask your little friends out there.
Maybe they care enough to save you.
Guys, please, help us!
Write your ideas about what makes the Great Attractor pull all the things in his direction!
Save us!