My father, when I was a kid,
he explained to me once he thought that
it's really good when kids don't quite know where they fit.
If a kid is too secure in their environment
they grew up maybe too self-satisfied.
Whereas if there's a little bit of
questioning, he and I don't think he was
intentionally trying to make this happen,
but he just sort of knew,
I grew up not quite knowing what are we,
are we, I think we're doing Yeah.
pretty well, but are we middle class, do we?
We have a really shitty car.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But we're in a nice house.
Yeah. But I'm Irish,
but I don't play hockey
like all the other kids who are Irish Catholic
and they kind of don't like me
and Jewish kids really like me.
I don't, I get, I don't quite, I'm not an athlete,
I don't quite know where I fit in to my environment.
But what I'm talking about is very subtle in a lot of ways,
but I felt it growing up
and I think it made me I don't know,
a little try harder to tune into what other people
were up to, what they were doing.
Something, I don't know,
but I think my dad might have had a point about that.
And when I think about your life, I think
that's, whatever discomfort I may have had,
I think for you might have been like to the third power
because you were, first of all, you're born
in South Korea.
And what time did your, when did your parents immigrate?
We immigrated 88. Right.
Yeah like we, my dad was so impatient.
He should have just waited.
He owned a home in Seoul he was doing well for himself
as an architect
and he just wanted to leave so bad.
My mom was like, wait till the Olympics,
maybe the housing value will go up
and then you can have some money to move over here.
And he was like, Nope, getting out of here.
Right. And we just
jumped on a plane, went to Canada
and we're here now and that--
How long were you in Canada before you?
A year.
And then you came to, you went to Michigan.
We went to Michigan, yeah,
but I think the key component of all of this
is that my parents didn't explain anything.
Right. Like I recently,
once I had my kids, I was talking to my dad,
who's the sweetest man,
but he was just like talking about my son
while he was standing there.
My son is like two or three at the time.
And he was like, oh, he doesn't know.
And I'm like, he knows,
he's taking in everything you're putting out.
Like he might not be able to conceptually understand it
and speak to you about it,
but like, he feels everything
and it made me understand,
I was like, oh, you didn't explain anything
when we, like you literally took
like safety and then displaced it
and didn't explain anything.
And that's a huge move for someone
at such a young age Huge move.
to be hurdled over into Canada
and then make your way down to Michigan.
Yeah.
You're part of this completely different culture.
Yeah.
And did your, were your parents fluent in English?
No.
And that's the thing too, is that like the dark,
like the dark part of it
that takes a while is like first you're displaced
and then there's this slow separation
from your parents over years
'cause I get more ingratiated into this place
Yeah. and they're still
like stuck where they're at.
Well, you have some of that Sona, right?
Yeah, right. Oh, everything
you're saying I'm totally,
I agree with. Because your parents
came to from Armenia to.
Well they came from Istanbul.
Istanbul. Both of them did.
Yeah, my dad came in the sixties,
my mom came in the seventies, they got married here
had both me and my dad brother here,
but they're still very like,
I mean, when your parents immigrated here,
they probably went towards where other Koreans were,
which is what my family did with Armenians
and so, you know,
Yeah. it's the exact same thing.
Yeah, yeah. You know, it's like,
how much do you assimilate?
How much do you stay true to who you are
and it's hard. And what feels
like a betrayal. Yes.
Is it a betrayal that you became so
you know you're such a,
some of your values are probably
very different from your parents.
Very different.
Yeah. Yeah.
100%, yeah. Yeah.
Total lack of morality
anyway. Okay well, Jesus.
Well seriously, whatever.