- What's up, everyone.
Welcome back to my website,
youtube.com/
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This video was called
How the 16 Personalities Connect with Others.
And this video is brought to you by Grammarly.
And I think this is an important video to make
because sometimes there might be people
we're hanging around and we're like,
"Why are they acting this way?
"What are they doing?"
And little do we realize
because they are a different personality type from us,
that they're actually trying to make a connection with us
and we're just confused by it.
So in this video I'm gonna go through
each of the personality types
and explain one or two things
that they might do in order to try
to make a connection with you.
And also,
what does your personality type lead you to do
that you don't even realize you're doing.
Stay tuned to the end
for my personal experience with this.
But before we get into it,
let me tell you about this video's sponsor, Grammarly,
which can help you better connect with others
in the written word.
But I got to change it into my ad reading polo.
Ooh, very professional.
I used to waste a lot of time
when I was writing emails for work.
I'd be rereading my emails over and over again,
being like,
"Is this the most effective word choice here?
"Is my writing clear enough?"
But then I got this video's sponsor, Grammarly,
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What?
To help you save time and work more efficiently.
Now back to the video.
Oh wow, I'm back in my shirt.
Other shirt.
Let us proceed.
Let's start first with the ISTJ and ESTJ.
These two types are probably
the most practical of all the personality types.
They are the doers.
They are the natural get out there
and let me get stuff done types.
You know Home Depot how it's like,
"We're the ones that get stuff done."
Or is that Lowe's?
Something about doers.
Frank, you really should have researched this
before you made a video.
Anyway, that hardware company
is talking about STJs basically.
They're the doers.
So ISTJs and ESTJs
might try to make a connection with you
by doing something practical,
by getting stuff done,
working together,
or at the very least,
discussing something practical.
How can we get something done?
How can we find a solution?
So if someone is like,
"Hey, let's mow the lawn together."
And you're like,
"This person is awful."
Maybe not.
Maybe they are just an ISTJ or ESTJ
trying to make a connection with you.
Are you gonna leave them hanging?
Get out there and mow that lawn.
I realized that a lot of my examples
having to do with ST types
always go back to lawn mowers for some reason.
Why?
So now let's move on to the STPs.
ISTP and ESTP.
How they make a connection.
I can speak fine until I turn on the camera.
These types, what they're gonna do
is they're gonna be like,
"I wanna connect with this person
"so I'm gonna challenge them to a friendly competition."
These types are very competitive.
They love showing off their skills at whatever it is.
They like playing games,
especially if they can get physical.
They like that.
So yeah, if a guy wants to arm wrestle you in a bar,
he could just be and ISTP or ESTP
trying to make a connection with you.
But these types can also make a connection
by discussing real world things.
They will ask you like,
"Give me the highlights of what you do
"and how you make that work.
"Tell me all about your car.
"Oh, awesome.
"Wanna go on a drag race?"
Next up, the ESFJ and ISFJ.
These types love a get together.
Love getting all the friends together,
getting everyone happy,
having some good food and drink around.
Maybe they will even host the party
to bring people together.
They'll invite you to their party.
And that in and of itself,
inviting you over,
that's indicative of something they will do
to make that connection.
They will express good feelings towards you
in very practical ways,
inviting you over,
giving you some food,
something like that.
Can I bring you a drink?
You know how the ISFJ
is the stereotypical nurse in MBTI?
The thing is,
these types, ESFJ and ISFJ
do like taking care of others.
And so when they're trying to connect with you,
they will do practical things
to take care of you
to make sure that you're feeling good.
So don't get annoyed.
I know the NTJs out there might get annoyed like,
"Stop buzzing around me
"and trying to give me all this stuff.
"Stop trying to tell me jokes and crap.
"Just let me be."
But it's just an ISFJ or ESFJ
trying to make a connection with you, Doug.
Now, let's go to the ISFP and ESFP.
I think these types are most likely
to look for a connection by trying to find
what do you like
and what do I like?
Where does that Venn diagram overlap?
The people and the things,
and the experiences that we both like,
that's where we're gonna find
a personal connection.
And see, this is the thing about introverted feeling,
which both of these types have introverted feeling.
So what they like,
what these types like,
is very personal.
And if you guys don't like the same things,
they're just gonna be like,
"What do we have between us? Nothing."
And these types aren't gonna fake it for you.
They're not gonna say they like something
when they really don't
because that's just not how introverted feeling works.
So if you're talking to someone and they're like,
"Hey, do you like this thing?
"Do you like that thing?"
And you've been saying no a lot,
and then they kind of just stop trying,
you might've been dealing with an ISFP or ESFP.
You either need to find something in common
or lie to them
to get back in with them.
Why don't we stop momentarily
and see if YouTube would like to show a commercial,
if I remember to put it in.
Thanks for sitting through that.
And if you're enjoying this video,
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Okay, now we're moving on to the intuitives.
So things are gonna get weird.
That's just what happens
when we start talking about intuitives.
We talked about the normal types
who have their feet firmly planted on the ground.
And now we're going to the types
that have their head in the clouds.
Let's go to the INTP and ENTP.
Oh boy, these types ma'am,
they are something else.
So when we talked about the STPs,
I said that they were kind of competitive.
They like games that you can actually play and win.
The NTPs, they like to play mental games.
I don't mean mind games
like they're trying to get one over on you.
What I mean is the conversation itself becomes
a kind of intellectually stimulating challenge to them
because these types,
I think I've said it in videos previously,
the INTP and ENTP love to just talk about
hypothetical ideas for fun.
That's their idea of fun.
What kind of life is that?
So if someone who's a little bit nerdy
starts talking to you about,
"What do you think about this hypothetical scenario
"and how would this work?
"And if you look out into the future and you think,
"how are things gonna work out this way or that way?"
And it's this weird abstract conversation
that's about something nerdy,
you probably got an INTP or ENTP
trying to connect with you.
One thing I've also found with these types
is that their sense of humor can often be very subtle.
So they might make jokes that go over your head.
So you need to be on your toes.
You don't wanna let those get by you
because they will think less of you.
Okay, now let's move to the INTJ and ENTJ.
Oh, geez. (laughs)
These types, man,
when they're trying to connect with you,
watch out.
So I mentioned with INTP and ENTP
that their sense of humor is kind of subtle.
Same for these types,
although all of their emotions
I think will be pretty subtle with this group,
especially INTJs.
ENTJs on the other hand,
they can have this weird thing
where they'll just have this explosive emotional energy,
but don't read too much into how they're acting.
What I mean is
they might not clearly display that they like you
or are trying to connect with you.
Instead, they're gonna try to find a topic
that you are interested in.
These types are similar to the NTPs
in that they want to have this
engaging intellectual discussion of abstract topics,
but they wanna keep it limited.
It's like,
"Let's find one topic and talk about that.
"And we'll throw out different ideas about this topic,
"maybe different solutions to this problem
"that we're talking about."
But these types, INTJ and ENTJ,
are also gonna be wanting to test out
each of those opinions
that's being put forward to be like,
"Is that actually true.
"Is that not true?"
And if you are a feeling type
going into that kind of conversation,
it can make you feel a little bit beaten up and bruised.
They're playing hard ball there.
But they're not doing it to make you feel dumb.
They're doing it
because that's how they connect with you.
So if you've got someone asking you and you,
"What do you think about this?"
And then you give them your opinion.
And then they're like,
"Oh yeah, I'm not so sure if that really works,
"if that's really true."
But then they come back and ask you more questions,
they're still engaging you on the topic,
you could be dealing with an INTJ or ENTJ,
who's just trying to make a connection.
Don't hide that under a bush.
Moving on to the ENFP and INFP.
These types are all over the place.
And they like to talk about amusing stuff,
amusing random things that's looking out
at all these different possibilities of stuff
that doesn't even make sense.
And if they find it funny,
that's what they're gonna talk about.
INFPs and ENFPs also have,
they love inside jokes.
And it's weird because it's like,
in a way,
they don't care if you laugh or not
as long as it's funny to them,
that's the priority there.
But I think they wanna be appreciated for being clever.
If you're able to catch on
and kind of get some of these inside jokes,
and especially if they are trying to include you,
make some kind of inside joke with you,
that is a good sign.
In a way it's like,
can you hang with their sense of humor?
Can you vibe with them?
They're testing that out.
So if someone is engaging you
in a bunch of stuff you can't even understand,
it's out there,
but they're laughing,
and you can tell that they're making some jokes
that it was funny on some level,
but it's like, "What? Dude."
It could be an INFP or ENFP
trying to make a connection with you,
trying to bring you in to the fold of people they like.
Then we move on to the INFJ and ENFJ.
And these types, man,
it's funny what they do,
but also scary.
To make a connection with you,
these types are going to go over the top
to try to make sure that you know
that they are feeling the way that
you want them to feel as you're talking.
So if you're telling a story
that is happy or whatever,
the NFJs are gonna act over the top oftentimes.
It's like, "Dude, really?
"Oh my gosh, that is so great."
What they're trying to do is read
how are you feeling about this?
How do you want them to feel about it?
And then they're trying to give that to you
in order to create the connection.
If you tell a joke,
they're probably gonna laugh,
even if they didn't find it funny.
And my personal experience with this,
being an INFJ,
is this,
I will be very expressive
to make sure that they get it.
They get that I'm listening
and I am reacting the way
that I should be reacting
because not only do I wanna react in the correct way,
but I also want you to feel good
and I want you to like me
and I'm trying to manipulate you.
What?
We're just having a good time here.
Well, that's about it from me.
Thanks for watching.
Watch another video right here.
Watch the whole playlist right here.
And until next time,
stay cool and attractive.
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