I'm gonna give you three ways by the end of this video,
so, stay tuned.
Hey, there, I'm Rebecca Zung.
I’m a negotiation expert and also know how to handle toxic people like a boss,
because I've had to handle them in my law practice and also in my life,
so, I'm going to tell you exactly how to handle them in this video and
I also do that every minute of every day,
on this channel, in these videos,
so subscribe and hit that notification bell before we go any further,
so that you can get the content as soon as I upload it.
I upload new videos every single day,
free content for you, where else are you going to get that from a lawyer?
So, before I tell you exactly how to handle manipulative person like a boss,
I want to give you a little primer on the basic types of manipulations,
because I think it's really, really important that you understand that.
People manipulate because of their own woundedness and their own pain and
I think you definitely need to understand that,
most of the time it's subconscious, okay?
Most of the time they think they're doing it for their own good,
I mean, I think people do things for their own reasons and motivations and
I think a lot of times, they don't even realize they're doing it.
I think everybody comes to the table with their own perspective and
they always think that they're right and
unless they really done some serious therapy or whatever,
they don't really even realize what's going on.
I think most of the time, they actually have their own anxieties,
their own subconscious behaviors and
unless they've been able to come out of their own consciousness,
they’re really not even going to ever realize what's going on.
Most of us have that honestly,
so I do want you to understand that hurt people hurt people and
we can all have a sense of empathy for that.
But, that doesn't necessarily mean
that people shouldn't have to take responsibility and
it doesn't mean that you should stay in those relationships,
so don't misunderstand me when I say that,
I just want you to understand people have
different reasons behind their actions, different motivations,
basically, there's different categories.
This person comes across as like they think it's their job to fix you,
they think it's their job to come in, fix you, it's for your own good;
they genuinely think that they're doing this for you and
if you don't do what they say,
they're easily angered, they’re put off because
they really believe that they know what's good for you.
So, they’re really super pushy about it and
they're kind of a bully about it and
force is like their primary tactic on how to get you to do what they want you to do,
because you need to eat this food or do this routine,
because this is what's good for you.
So, that's kind of how they are,
that's the master personality on manipulation.
They genuinely do a lot of amazing things for you and
now they believe that you owe them,
because they saved you and if you don't show them this gratitude,
then you're supposed to feel guilty and
they try to make you feel guilty if you don't feel this debt of gratitude.
So, that's another way of manipulating you.
So, that's the next one.
This is the one that's like a little harder to spot,
this is another form of manipulator,
“I'm so powerless”,
but, their primary tactic is to manipulate through “I'm so helpless”,
but that's another way of manipulating, alright?
So, those are the primary forms of manipulators.
So, how can you handle these manipulators like a boss?
If you're not, then you need to make sure that you have a plan,
make sure you're not going to have any kind of negative backlash and
if you are, make sure that you are seeking the help of a family member,
a friend, some kind of support system, whether it's a counselor, a therapist,
somebody who's going to be able to help you.
Make sure you have a stash of cash,
make sure you have a plan, make sure you have a safe place to land;
If not, make sure that you have called "The Domestic Abuse Hotline”,
I'm going to make sure that that number is below so,
make sure that you definitely have a plan for where you're going to go.
Make sure that you know how to set and
enforce healthy boundaries and stop playing along,
that's part of setting and enforcing healthy boundaries,
to stop playing along.
They're going to be upset for a while, but that's okay.
They will eventually start making changes
because what's happened is they've conditioned you,
you now have to start conditioning them back.
You're now going to start teaching them how to treat you,
in a different way that you've taught them;
you're now going to teach them something else.
If that means that you're going to no longer have them in your life,
then that's what that means.
So, that's number two.
If you need to end the relationship with this toxic person,
I have a whole video on that, you can definitely check that out;
how to end the relationship with the toxic person.
Because they do get into your thoughts,
they get into your brain waves, I've been there.
In the middle of the night, you're thinking about it,
you wake up in the morning and thinking about it,
you’re brushing your teeth, thinking about it,
you're walking the dog, you’re thinking about it…
It's a constant thing.
So, I always say, I never leave my thoughts unsupervised.
You have to start raising your vibrational energy,
you have to start changing and shifting every single piece of yourself.
So, how are you going to start doing that?
You're going to have to start listening to audiobooks,
you're going to have to start making sure that everything you do,
is dedicated to changing your thoughts,
change your thoughts, you change your life… How do you do that?
Listening to YouTube videos, you're listening to the books you want to listen to,
your input, equals your output, change the people around you.
Don't have people around you saying things that are not helping.
Are the people around you supportive?
Or they are not supportive?
Look around.
Who are the top five people in your life?
Are these people helpful or not?
When you walk away from them,
do you feel better or do you not feel better?
Those are the three ways to handle a manipulative person like a boss,
because you are a boss and
if you are so ready to slay and
you are so ready to get away from these toxic people and
so ready to make a change,
then, make sure you have subscribed to this channel,
hit that notification bell,
you have grabbed my free “Crush my negotiation” prep worksheet,
at winmynegotiation.com.
You have joined my free private Facebook group,
at “Narcissists Negotiators with Rebecca Zung” and
you have liked this video, you have commented on this video,
you have shared this video, you have joined my community
because you never want to give up, you never want to give in,
that's when they win, that's it.
They are way more afraid of you than you are of them,
I promise you that, I know this for a fact, I have been there, for sure.
It is time. This is your moment.
Today is the best day for you to start negotiating your best life.
I'm Rebecca Zung.
I will definitely see you in the next video.