[CROWD CHEERING] >> Jon: WELCOME YOUNG MAN.
>> THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
>> Jon: HAVE YOU RECOVERED FROM THE LIVE PORTION, THE
BEACON THEATRE PORTION.
>> YEAH.
>> Jon: OF NIGHT OF TOO MANY STARS?
>> IT'S A HARD GIG.
>> Jon: SATURDAY NIGHT.
>> IT'S A HARD GIG.
I HAVE NOT RECOVERED AND IT'S NOT OVER.
>> Jon: IT'S NOT OVER BY A LONGSHOT.
>> IT'S NOT OVER, WE'RE DOING A LIVE PHONE BANK ON SUNDAY NIGHT.
>> Jon: THIS SUNDAY NIGHT.
>> THAT'S WHEN THE SHOW AIRS, YES.
>> Jon: BUT I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU --
>> YES.
>> DOING THIS A WHILE, LAST -- IT WAS SATURDAY NIGHT --
>> YEAH.
>> Jon: I'M TELLING YOU, I THOUGHT MORE INSANE THINGS
HAPPENED THAT SATURDAY NIGHT THAN IN ANY SHOW
THAT WE'VE DONE SO FAR WITH THIS.
>> YES.
YEAH, WELL YOU KNOW, I, I KIND OF, WHEN MY SON WAS DIAGNOSED
WITH AUTISM A LONG TIME AGO. >> Jon: RIGHT.
>> AND I ALWAYS KIND OF --
>> Jon: HOW OLD IS DANIEL NOW?
>> HE'S 17 YEARS OLD. >> Jon: RIGHT.
>> AND I ALWAYS THOUGHT, YOU KNOW, EARLY ON I KIND OF DIDN'T
WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT, PARTLY BECAUSE I'M TRIUMPH THE
INSULT COMIC DOG'S HAND UP THE ASS. AND I KIND OF LIKE
TO -- THERE HE IS.
>> Jon: THERE HE IS. >> HOW ARE YOU?
>> Jon: HELLO!
>> AND I THOUGHT MAYBE IT'S BETTER PEOPLE JUST LOOK AT ME AS
AN ASSHOLE, YOU KNOW?
>> Jon: SO IF THEY WERE TO SEE YOU AS HUMAN --
>> YEAH WELL, IT'S KIND OF CREEPY ESPECIALLY WHEN
I DO THE VOICE. BUT I FIGURED, LIKE AT THIS POINT THIS SHOW HAS
GOTTEN SO BIG. >> Jon: RIGHT.
>> AND IMPORTANT. >> Jon: YES.
>> THAT LET'S JUST PICTURE IT AS A COMEDY, AS A CHARITY EVENT
RUN BY AN ASSHOLE. WHAT IF A CHARITY EVENT WERE RUN BY
SOMEONE WHO'S DISTURBS BUT WELL MEANING?
>> Jon: VERY WELL MEANING.
YOU KNOW, THERE IS NOTHING I THINK TO RAISE THE HUMAN SPIRIT
LIKE SEEING PAUL RUDD ON HIS KNEES.
>> YES. YES.
>> Jon: TAKING FULLY CHEWED WHAT APPEARED TO BE D'AGOSTINO'S
CHICKEN.
>> I THINK IT WAS ZABAR'S.
>> Jon: WAS THAT A ZABAR'S?
>> YEAH, IT WAS A CLASSY EVENT.
>> Jon: AND THIS GENTLEMAN IN THE AUDIENCE --
>> YES.
>> Jon: WON THE BIDDING AND CAME UP.
>> ACTUALLY, THOSE PEOPLE CAME ON FOR FREE.
>> Jon: FOR FREE.
>> YEAH, A LOT OF THE SHOW IS --
>> Jon: AUCTIONS.
>> AUCTIONS. THE BEACON THEATRE IS FILLED WITH ABOUT 2500
PEOPLE. >> Jon: YES.
>> ABOUT 75 OF THEM ARE REALLY RICH AND CRAZY AND
WILING TO AUCTION, WILLING TO BID, GOD BLESS THEM.
>> Jon: THEY'RE CRAZY AUCTIONS.
>> THEY WANTED TO SUPPORT THIS CAUSE.
>> Jon: CHRIS ROCK DID A LIVE AUCTION IN THE THEATRE,
LOUIS CK TOOK SOMEBODY OUT. >> YES.
>> Jon: CAN I TELL THEM WHAT JOHN OLIVER DID?
>> SURE, YEAH.
>> Jon: THEY BID, THERE WAS AN AUCTION TO BID TO COMMIT A
CRIME WITH JOHN OLIVER.
>> YES, AND IT HAPPENED! THE CRIME WAS COMMITTED.
[APPLAUSE] >> Jon: IT WENT OUT THAT NIGHT
WITH A CAMERA AND COMMITTED A CRIME.
[LAUGHTER]
>> IT'S THE -- IT'S THE WRONGEST CHARITY EVENT.
>> Jon: AND YET IT'S SO LOVELY BUT THERE ARE MOMENTS IN
IT. >> YES.
>> Jon: THE MOMENT WITH OWEN SUSKIND.
WITH RON SUSKIND'S SON OWEN.
>> WELL YES. THIS IS THE CRAZY THING THAT ON THE ONE HAND --
>> Jon: YES. >> PAUL RUDD LITERALLY THIS
HAPPENED THAT WITHIN TEN MINUTES OF EACH OTHER.
>> Jon: YES. RIGHT BACK TO BACK.
>> PAUL RUDD REGURGITATED, RECEIVED REGURGITATED FOOD.
>> Jon: FOOD. >> TEN MINUTES LATER
LITERALLY GILBERT GOTTFRIED WAS MAKING PEOPLE CRY. YEAH.
>> Jon: BUT, CRY WITH EMOTION NOT LIKE HE WOULD NORMALLY --
>> WITH EMOTION -- WELL YEAH. YEAH. NORMALLY THEY'RE CRYING
OUT OF AGONY.
>> Jon: NOT LIKE GILBERT WOULD NORMALLY DO.
>> YEAH, NOT THE AGONY KIND OF CRYING HE USUALLY GENERATES.
>> Jon: YES.
>> NO.
IT'S LIKE IT'S AN INCREDIBLE MOMENT.
>> Jon: IT'S AN INCREDIBLY MOVING MOMENT WHERE HE ISTHE
CONDUIT THROUGH WHICH THIS YOUNG MAN OWEN COMMUNICATES HIS
FEELINGS TO HIS FAMILY AND TO OTHERS AROUND HIM.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Jon: IT'S AMAZING. >> RIGHT.
WELL THE WHOLE SHOW IS ABOUT RAISING MONEY NOT TO CURE
AUTISM. >> Jon: RIGHT.
>> BECAUSE A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE WORKING ON BIOMEDICAL RESEARCH.
MY WIFE AND I COULDN'T GET OUR KID INTO ANY KIND OF SCHOOL OR
PROGRAM THAT WAS ADEQUATE FOR HIM UNTIL HE WAS SEVEN YEARS
OLD.
AND PEOPLE WITH FEWER RESOURCES THAN US --
>> Jon: RIGHT.
>> IT'S UNIMAGINABLE TO US WHAT THEY HAVE TO GO THROUGH.
AND, AND THE KIDS. THEY DESERVE BETTER.
THESE ARE, YOU KNOW, LAST YEAR WE HAD A MOMENT, I DON'T KNOW IF
YOU SAW LAST YEAR'S SHOW OR SAW IT ONLINE, KATY PERRY DID A
DUET. >> Jon: YES. WITH JODI DIPIAZZA.
>> WITH A LITTLE GIRL.
DID EVERYBODY SEE THAT? WITH JODI DIPIAZZA?
>> Jon: YEAH, IT WAS AMAZING.
AND SHE, AND THIS LITTLE GIRL PLAYS THE PIANO AND THEN THERE'S
THIS MOMENT WHERE SHE RECEIVES SPONTANEOUS APPLAUSE AND SHE
SMILES. AND PEOPLE --
>> Jon: SHE JUST LIGHTS UP. >> SHE JUST LIGHTS UP.
AND THAT'S THE KIND OF THE THING PEOPLE ARE SHOCKED, A LOT OF
PEOPLE JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND -- >> Jon: RIGHT.
>> THAT THESE ARE WHOLE HUMAN BEINGS AND
THEY'RE ENTITLED TO NOT BE OSTRACIZED AND WRITTEN OFF.
THEY NEED TO BE GIVEN THE CHANCE TO HAVE THE BEST LIFE AS
POSSIBLE. >> Jon: RIGHT. YEP.
[APPLAUSE] >> AND THIS ALLOWS ALL KINDS OF
PROGRAMS. THROUGH OUR SHOW, WE FUND, WE FUND PROGRAMS ALL OVER
THE COUNTRY, SCHOOLS, PROGRAMS, A WIDE RANGE OF THINGS.
>> Jon: BUT "THE NIGHT OF TOO MANY STARS"
THE LIVE AUCTION PART
ON COMEDY CENTRAL THIS SUNDAY NIGHT, I URGE YOU TO
TUNE IN. IT'S MARCH 8, 8:00 PM.
WE'LL DO A PHONE BANK. WE'LL SHOW ALL THE GREAT --
>> Jon: YES, LARRY, DAVID AND MARTY SHORT WILL BE AT THE
PHONE BANK.
>> Jon: THEY'LL BE AT THE PHONE BANK ALL NIGHT.
WE'LL DO THE SKITS AND STUFF AT THE BEACON WILL
BE ALL IN THE SHOW. >> YEAH.
>> Jon: IT'S GOING TO BE GREAT. OBVIOUSLY JACK AND TRIUMPH
YOU CAN SEE FRIDAY NIGHTS AT 11:30 ON ADULT SWIM.
THE GREAT ROBERT SMIGEL, EVERYBODY.