What's going on, baby girl?
Oh, nothing much.
How y'all doing?
How you doing, Marlon?
Good.
Good to see the audience.
Right?
The TV is watching you.
Remember Superman 3, or 2, back in the day.
When the Zod and them got into the thing that--
Yeah, the glass platelets.
Yeah.
That's what they look like.
That was the old Superman.
I just aged myself.
Yeah.
Well, you know, I seen that too, so--
You look good, baby girl.
But I was like, four.
Thank you, thank you.
Look at you.
You done growed up.
Look at you.
Yeah, I done grewed up a little bit.
I like the hair.
Thank you, thank you.
I like your hair.
Well, you know, I cut mine too.
You inspired me.
Wakanda [INAUDIBLE].
I was talking about the facial hair.
Oh, my beard.
I haven't seen you with facial hair like this.
Yeah, manhood hit me.
I'm going through puberty very late in life.
You grown now, you grown.
It's taking a minute.
Actually these are extensions.
You got a face weave?
I got a face weave.
Yeah, I need a little toupee because of this little hole
right there.
Oh, OK.
Nobody can see that unless they short and they looking up.
It's coming.
I've got a chest this year and a beard.
You've got a chest and a beard?
Yeah.
Did you buy the chest?
God is good.
No, I made the chest.
You made the chest?
You could buy a chest.
I can't a chest.
No.
I been hearing men been our here buying chests.
No, we ain't doing that.
There's certain things I just ain't going to buy.
Men been buying calves, butts and chest.
Now, as a black man, did dig the calves thing.
It's very hard for us to get.
So give me the number to that doctor.
Look, we've known each other a very long time.
Do you remember when we first met?
I think I met you--
I think Jamie Masada did a comedy camp.
And me and Sean went to the comedy camp and you was loud.
You was a little, you were loud.
You were, I'm a B. Yeah, I'm ready.
As a kid, you were like 16?
Yeah, I was 16.
I had an Afro and I was real loud.
Yeah you were.
I didn't think you would remember that.
Because I felt like the first time we met was,
it was like 2005.
I remember at Jamie's, that was like '97.
No I seen you at that comedy camp.
Because I think you--
You had a crush on Sean.
Yeah.
I was trying to holler at Sean.
I didn't have a beard yet.
Yeah, you were 16.
He didn't want to holler at you [INAUDIBLE]..
But I felt like there was opportunity there.
Because it's two years to 18.
No.
You were 16.
You were unready.
I thought I was.
But do you remember, it was like 2005 at Eddie Murphy's house.
It was 4th of July.
He had the water slide out there.
And it was you, Keenan and Sean was at the house.
And I was talking to Keenan and Sean.
And then you kept looking at me like I was crazy?
Because I look at you now like you're crazy.
I been looking at you the whole time like, 2005?
I don't even remember yesterday, girl.
[LAUGHTER]
And you know, it's funny.
Even though I do decent in life, but Eddie Murphy's house
is so nice, I feel poor.
I just left his house feeling so unaccomplished.
I wanted to rob him.
He had 17 things I wanted to rob.
He had statues and TVs.
If I could rob a bowling alley, I would have.
Man, man.
I stole all the candy.
I had, you know I always carried that backpack purse.
I had put so much candy in that purse.
I still got the candy and I labeled each one,
"Eddie Murphy house", "Eddie Murphy house", "Eddie Murphy
house".
You could take the girl out the project,
but you can't take the girl out the projects.
First of all, I never grew up in the projects.
I did.
OK.
You was in the projects?
I was.
I'm proud of it.
I was in the hood.
South Central is--
Y'all ain't messing with the projects.
Hood is all right, but the projects is different.
Yeah I know.
But we both have roaches, so.
Yeah but y'all had a lawn.
We didn't have a lawn.
You had roaches?
Yeah I had roaches.
You didn't have roaches in the West Coast.
Yeah we got roaches.
Those are east coast bugs.
We got roaches that fly.
Wow.
Those are called water bugs.
OK.
Well then we didn't have roaches, we had water bugs.
[LAUGHTER]
OK.
So this is something I've been wanting to bring up now.
I know we friends and I know you love me.
I love you.
I adore you, girl.
And you have helped me in so many different aspects
and gave me some great advice.
But this is what I want to know.
I have auditioned for so many of your movies
that your friends, your family on.
Why do I never get cast?
Here's the thing--
You even made a role.
That said, Tiffany Haddish type.
I auditioned for my film.
I auditioned to play me.
You wasn't right for the part.
I wasn't right for the part?
No.
Here's what happened.
Here's what happens.
Me and my family always say you're funny.
As producers, you hire people and you cast people.
You were always funny.
But you were you was always on 10.
And sometimes you just be inappropriate.
It's like a love scene and you want
to sit on actors lap and fart.
And it's like no, Tiffany, it's not for this scene.
So it was just, maturation hit you.
It's like for me even, right now,
I feel like I'm ready for--
I've been preparing 30 years for what's happening to me now.
And it all happens to you at a certain time when maturity
and that stardom hits you.
Never nothing personal.
We love you.
Always thought was funny.
And me and my family proud of you.
And we thank you for helping, you
put my niece, Shantae, on She Ready.
Yeah, They Ready.
It's called, They Ready.
It's a She Ready Production, because I
have a production company now.
I'm creating my own jobs.
I'm so proud of you.
But I'm happier that you actually employed my niece
so I don't have to.
Because I got too many to take care of.
You go and do a, He Ready?
Because I got some nephews to help out too.
Well, we doing They Ready.
Season two is coming up.
OK, good.
We'll be looking out for some of your nephews.
But we got to go to break.
We'll be right back with more Marlon Wayans ladies
and gentlemen.