- Uncle Roger thought induction stove
is the worst thing you can cook on,
but some people out there are animal
and they cook food in coffee maker.
- I made a boiled egg in a coffee maker in a hotel room.
- If you traveling, and you can't afford food,
maybe the solution is not coffee maker.
Maybe solution is don't travel.
Hello, niece and nephew.
It's uncle Roger.
Hotel is terrible place.
If you've been to hotel, uncle Roger guarantee
they don't wash the coffee maker at all.
And now in this weejio, this niece here,
she making a whole meal in coffee maker.
Haiyaa. It like she wants to get diarrhea on purpose.
Everybody is disgusting in hotel room
because not our house, we don't give shit.
We treat hotel room like how, how to basic treat his house.
Remember this just comedy weejio uncle Roger,
just joking around.
Don't go attack anyone after this. Just laugh.
- I made a boiled egg in a coffee maker in a hotel room.
Ordering room service at hotels can get pretty expensive.
And when you travel often,
sometimes you just crave home cooked food.
- What? This is your home cooked food, haiyaa!
What kind of broken family you come from?
Your mother making food in coffee maker.
You need to get new mother.
I think this girl mum is psycho.
♪Psycho psycho. ♪
- First, here's some items that are easy to carry
in your luggage.
Instant oatmeal packets, instant ramen.
- You know what easier to carry than all those thing, cash.
You can use this to buy food
instead of making it in coffee maker.
- Flour tortillas, small paper plates, aluminum foil sheets
and plastic cutlery.
All of these items fit perfectly
into one food storage bag and nicely-
- That looked like most depressing holiday ever!
Also imagine if you get stopped
at custom carrying the pack of shit.
(Roger sighs)
Uncle Roger rather get stopped for carrying white powder
and by white powder I mean MSG.
(Roger snorts)
- Once you arrive at your destination
you can hit up a local convenience store or grocery
and pick up small items like half dozen eggs,
make some bacon bits and-
- Wait, what?
- Once you arrive at your destination,
you can hit up a local convenience store or grocery.
- So you gonna go to store anyway?
So what do you just get food from store?
Why bother packing that sad food in bag?
What her logic? Haiyaa!
- Oatmeal. Place instant oatmeal in a coffee maker carafe.
Fill the reservoir with filtered water and turn it on.
- Look so sad.
- Sit for a bit.
Pro tip. If your room offers complimentary teabags,
just add it to your oatmeal for some extra flavor
- Ew, who add teabag to oatmeal!
Why you want your oat to taste like earl gray tea?
Oatmeal is the saddest food ever.
It's so sad even MSG cannot save it.
It like white people congee.
Congee is one of uncle Roger favorite dish ever.
It a classic Chinese breakfast dish
or something you eat when you sick, that right?
In Asia when you sick, you just eat congee.
Nobody need doctor.
Mom, I have COVID.
Just eat congee.
(Roger laughs)
- (Beep) offers complimentary teabags.
Just add it to your oatmeal for some extra flavor.
Yes for tea bagging.
- So dirty this niece. But being tea bag by someone
still more hygienic than using hotel coffee maker.
Sorry, children.
Ew, look at that.
- I also love a little bit of-
- So sad.
- On top.
Gently, place eggs in the carafe.
-Add filtered water. -I guess
Turn on the the machine
and allow the to sit for about seven to 10 minutes.
Peel and enjoy.
For some ramen, place the packet contents into the carafe.
Add, you guessed it, filtered water, turn it on.
- So she making instant noodle now.
Who pack oatmeal with instant noodle?
What is...
(Roger groaning)
- Mix and enjoy straight out of the carafe.
Make sure you clean the carafe really well
with some soap and water afterwards.
Here's what you can make with an iron.
- So she gonna destroy the coffeemaker
and now she gonna destroy the iron. Haiyaa.
- Form an iron sheet pan by folding-
- Who travel with aluminum foil?
- Who packing for a trip going,
"Okay. I pack shoe. I pack Jean. I pack my underwear.
Feel like I'm missing something.
Hmm. I know. Travel essential."
- Allow the iron to heat up
and you can cook items like bacon.
Then use some of that bacon fat to fry an egg.
You just need a little bit of patience.
- Wait, so you have to hold the iron this whole time?
How much free time this woman has?
Are you unemployed or something?
(upbeat music)
- Or make a quickie quesadilla on an ironing board.
- No no no.
- Then tortilla spread on the cheese and iron it out.
- First of all, iron not replacement for real fire.
You want to cook? Use the real fire.
You want to wok hay? No such thing as iron hay.
Also, when business people they actually want to use iron
to iron their shirt
and now they smell like bacon and tortilla.
This woman gonna get them fired.
- Feeling fancy.
Use the coffee maker to make actual coffee this time.
Now get a small container of ice cream
and make yourself an affogato dessert.
I may not be in a suite, but I'm sure living the sweet life.
(Roger laughs)
- You can tell the exact moment she regret her decision.
She trying hard to pretend that it tastes good.
But uncle Roger bet after the cameras stopped rolling,
she just go ptooey ptooey ptooey.
Secretly she just dying inside.
But it not only her.
See, this another weejio.
Can this chef make a 3-course meal in coffee maker?
Haiyaa, why you all torturing uncle Roger like that? Why?
- I'm Alexis.
And I'm the senior food specialist here at tasty.
- Oh.
- No.
- You can leave it.
- No, don't take her rice cooker.
(dramatic music)
- I don't drink coffee. And I think I have-
- You don't drink coffee?
So how you wake up?
Is it just the voices in your head?
- It feels hot.
So I think I can actually go ahead and add the shrimp.
So we just wanna make sure
that the shrimp is cooked through and pink.
It's actually turning pink.
You can see it turning pink
- It turning pink because it embarrassed
to be seen with you.
If uncle Roger hang out with woman
who puts seafood in coffee maker, I turn pink also.
Auntie Helen has new boyfriend now
and I hope her new boyfriend only make food
for her in coffee maker because that all she deserve.
- I'm allowed to say like give myself pat on the back,
but this is really good.
- She gonna make salmon in coffee maker.
- Next I'm going to poach the salmon.
It needs to be enough oil to submerge the salmon.
- Aah, she making salmon confit.
- Salmon down so that it'll actually fit in the coffee pot.
I'm gonna to infuse the oil
with some peppercorns, lemon rinds.
- Okay, decent ingredient.
- I'm getting the oil to about 180
and this salmon in.
So, ooh. This looks really gross.
The fat is clearly leaving the salmon.
- Ew.
Ew, you're right it gross,
the fat leaving salmon
and you should leave kitchen. Haiyaa.
Salmon is beautiful fish and you treat it like this.
It looked like the salmon mutating.
It tried to grow leg so it can escape from there.
- The fat is clearly leaving the salmon.
- Also niece and nephew, this not fat.
This a protein in salmon called albumin.
And when you cook salmon too hot, it all come up like this.
It make uncle Roger put my leg down from chair.
I think because in this coffee maker,
you can't control temperature.
The heating at bottom.
So bottom part hotter than top part.
Uncle Roger don't know why she used thermometer
to measure temperature.
You can't even control that shit.
- And then, but it looks like...
Oh my God, it looks like it's covered in warts.
There's like little balls of fat.
(Alexis laughs)
- That her little dance when she sees gross thing.
- Okay. The salmon, I don't know.
- Look just like auntie Helen before makeup.
- This needs a thorough wash after what just happened.
- Yeah, no shit.
- Onto part two.
So for this, I'm gonna like simmer some beans.
And just putting beans in a coffee pot feels wrong.
What, what she say?
What she say?
- I just put in beans and a coffee pot feels wrong.
- Putting beans in coffee pot feel wrong?
But putting prawn and salmon in there feel right?
What this woman thinking?
Uncle Roger would hate to be her roommate.
Good morning, time for my coffee.
(Roger spits)
Why coffee tastes like fish?
Did you make salmon again?
Haiyaa.
- So hopefully those tomatoes can blacken and kind of...
- Run for your life tomato, they gonna torture you.
- Hopefully they can get some char.
Ooh. Okay. There's some sound.
- Just like Jamie Oliver weejio.
You hear sizzling. I hear your ancestor crying.
- Ooh. There's a little bit of-
- Not enough color.
You might as well eat it raw if look like this.
- I'm almost done.
So I'm gonna text some friends,
see if they wanna come up and try it and-
- You're gonna to text your friend
don't invite other people to eat this bullshit?
If your friend invite you to their place
to eat coffeemaker food?
They not friend.
- I feel like they gonna have
some inclination that something's up but,
I don't think they would guess a coffeemaker
- I get courses here.
- Okay.
Her voice is most annoying voice uncle Roger ever here.
I changed my mind.
She deserves to eat coffeemaker food.
- Wine and dine.
- Wine and dine mi honey.
Wine and dine mi honey.
That all uncle Roger hear.
Wine and dine.
(Roger laughs)
(beep)
- We've got some white beans with olive oil perched salmon,
steamed asparagus ribbons and blistered tomatoes.
- I like it.
- You like it?
Haiyaa, where are your taste bud?
Where your taste part?
- This challenge today
to make all these three courses with a twist.
- What was the twist? Oh God.
- I made all 3-courses using only a coffee maker.
- Stop.
- Agree, stop making food in coffee maker.
Haiyaa.
(camera shatters)
I hope her new boyfriend always cooked for her.
I hope auntie Helen new boyfriend always cook food
for her in coffee maker.
That all she deserves.
(Roger laughs)
- (beep) All right. Let's try coffee spitting scene.
Let's try to not ruin any of my furniture or laptop.
(Roger spits)
Lets hope I got it.
(Roger laughs).
(beep) If they invite you over
for coffeemaker food.
They not friend.
Friend don't try to give friends diarrhea (beep)
Nieces and nephews, feel free to Photoshop this still.
It can be an uncle Roger meme, you know, right?
Just put the text on it.
(Roger laughs)
(beep) And by white powder, I mean MSG.
(Roger snorting)
(Roger laughs)
you can clearly tell I've never done coke before.
(Roger laughing)
(Roger snorting)
This is how people do Coke.
(Roger snorting)
(Roger laughs)