[american accent] Sever this cookie is not sweet enough.
Go get me a new one right now!
Go do your job properly
and get that damn chef to cook me something that tastes good.
And I'm taking my gratuities off too!
[music]
Cheers and ahoy there cruises
I'm Ben, I’m Ben? [laughter]
[ben] Really?
I have had one sip!
I'm David and this is Ben from Honest Cruising.
This week we're going to be having a look at what not to do on a cruise.
There's plenty of things and this is not meant to be a preachy video all.
It's just a little bit of fun and we're going to be having a good old moan.
Number one.
Don't moan when you're on a cruise.
We know everybody likes a good winge but not on holiday!
Yeah if you have any problems with your cruise.
Just go to get services and they will try and sort it out.
Exactly we've seen so many vocal people on our cruises
who are just constantly moaning.
There was always the serial moaner I would walk past in the bar.
What? Serial moaner?
What's funny about a serial moaner.
You do get serial wingers or serial moaners.
You walk past them you see them at the pool in the morning about something.
Then morning in the restaurant.
It's like for God's sake just enjoy yourself.
You are on holidays. Do you know what I mean?
And if you are going to moan just do it in your cabin.
[laughing] To whoever you’re travelling
[Ben] You can't say that! If you do wanna moan do it in your cabin?
[David laughing] Oh my god! I just got that.
[laughing] If your gonna moan just moan in your cabin.
[high pitched laughing] I didn’t mean it like that.
So somewhat to-dos on a cruise.
Make sure that you always dress appropriately.
Most cruises will have a dress code for a certain restaurant
or sometimes the whole ship.
There's nothing worse than your in your tux
and somebody walks in with a t-shirt with a tux printed on it.
So if it's a formal night
and you want to go to formal night
and you're going to go to a dinner or whatever.
Make sure you dress up formally because it does bring the mood down for everybody else.
Everybody tries so hard.
Yes and there's plenty of other places if you don't want to go to formal night.
You can go to the buffet or some of the more casual restaurants.
So we just say respect the dress code.
Its there to make things feel really nice for people
Another thing to do is,
if there's a dress-up night,
go for it. It's always so fun.
Yeah, I know. Get involved.
Don't be one of those people who are just like.
“Bah Humbug, I don't wanna do it”.
Just get dressed up and do.
So the next one must be one of our biggest bugbears.
Lifts or elevators if you are in America.
Don't use them, seriously, honestly, don't use them if you don't need to.
Just for two reasons really.
Well, you can use them but somebody else needs it more than you.
But it's such good exercise.
Especially when you're on a cruise and your eating like a pig.
You need to get the exercise.
But there are so many people who do need to use it
and we've seen people waiting for ages for a lift
and people just abuse the lift systems.
It's like, just use the stairs.
And we have like, say the end of the night,
and you can't be bothered to walk up that one flight of stairs.
So you get the lift.
But if there was something that needed it
you'd get out.
Because we've seen queues for this lifts before
and we are like come on guys
you can literally walk up one flight of stairs
quicker than you been waiting for this lift.
So this is my biggest bug bearer on a cruise.
[Ben] Bearer? [David] Bearer, yeah.
[Ben] Bear. [David] Bear? Are you sure?
[Ben] Bug bearer. There is no such thing as a Bug bearer.
We have not even had half a glass of wine and we are acting like we are completely trollied.
One of the things I really dislike on a cruise
is people that don't wash their hands that when going into the buffer.
Or even worse
don't wash their hands in the toilets as well.
Oh my god yeah.
You will not believe the number of people that we saw coming out of a toilet.
When you sat there washing hands and they just come out of the cubicle
and they have literally just not washed there hands.
Walk straight back into the buffet
and start manhandling the tongs.
Which you are going to touch in two minutes.
That's anywhere though. It's disgusting.
I think they need to reinforce the washing of hands when you go into the buffet.
Some cruise liners are so much better than others.
But it comes down to personal responsibility at the end of the day.
This goes down to people even touching the food.
Where somebody just actually goes and just goes and touches the cake
and then takes it off instead of using the tongs.
Or people pick up the food, like if it's in a bowl, to look at it.
And they literally go like this.
Have a look at it. Oh no, I don't want that piece then put it back.
Yeah, that's really bad.
Or the people that like stick there head--
[Ben] Oh yeah, under the little heater.
Guys, you are going to be roasted in a minute.
[David] Why would you do that?
[Ben] Maybe they want an extra tan under the heater. I don't know.
One more thing is to just respect your neighbours on a night.
Some cabin walls are like paper.
So when you're being all loud and leary walking down after a night out on the tiles.
[american accent] GIRL! I HAD SUCH A GOOD NIGHT TONIGHT. BANG BANG BANG BANG.
Just have respect for your other cruisers because you don't really wake them up.
We've been down where we've had screaming kids running up and down
it at one o'clock in the morning before.
Its like guys come on seriously.
We respect you, you respect us as well.
This is why we always say to take ear plugs.
You've got to think that there are complete strangers
literally ten, not even ten feet away from you,
a meter away from you.
Yeah definitely wear ear plug.
Its such a great thing and it's stops the creaking and stuff in the--
Yeah because sometimes the cabins creak on a night.
Because of the movement of the ship.
Nothing, nothing else. [laughing]
Sexual innuendo!
Seriously, so bad.
[David] When the boats a-rockin' don't come a-knocking.
[Ben] When the boat rocks.
One thing that really, kind of, gets a lot of discussion going is tips.
Personally, I don't like them calling them in gratuitous because they shouldn't be.
There should just be a service charge.
They should be included.
It's the where they call them gratuity means that people feel like they can take them off.
I mean you shouldn't take them off because if you have an issue
you need to go directly to customer services and they will get it sorted for you.
It seems to be like a like a recent trend.
We have seen it on a lot of forums where people are saying;
‘I had a really bad experience with one waiter so I'm going to remove all my gratuities.
I am going to go down to guest services and have them all removed.’
That's so unfair.
These people on the cruises work so hard.
Below minimum wage, you are affecting everybody if you take off your tips.
Some of the things I've seen people complaining about so petty.
Really guys, come on, enjoy your holiday. Just have a good time and enjoy it.
Have a drink. Put your leg- put your feet up.
Put your legs up!
[laughing]
There is like a trend here.
Another thing is, sometimes the way people speak to the servers.
Oh yeah!
We've had a couple of occasions where in the dining room we have heard people,
they don't like their food which is fear enough,
but then is the way they speak to the servers.
They start screaming at the servers.
Like guys come on have some respect for fellow human beings.
Do you know what I mean?
If you don't like your food.
Just say to them and the server will be more than happy to take it back.
So lastly we are going to have something a little more positive.
Instead of moaning and not enjoying your cruise.
Try to let your hair down and enjoy every single second.
Okay so remember to let your hair down and enjoy the cruise.
I let mine down so much that it fell out.
It's such a good crowd and you can have such a good laugh with everybody.
99% of people are so friendly and so happy
and want to get involved and have a good time.
Don't be that other 1% who drag it down for everybody else.
Okay, guys, that's it for this week.
We hope you enjoyed some of our do-not-dos on a cruise.
Please don't take these too seriously.
It's all just a good laugh.
Why not have a good moan yourself in the comment section below.
So until next time, Happy Cruising.