#1 Tattoos
Now this is the tip that inspired this video in the first place.
Now you know me, I’m Zeus, god of everything, and I was casually reading some evolutionary
biology to look at how dope the shit I created in the world is, and I found out that evolutionary
biologists theorized that tattoos can signal how tough you are.
Back in the uncivilized caveman gangster days, tattooing was way more painful and risky than
it is today.
You think the caveman monkey dudes were wearing gloves and using sterile needles and shit?
Fuck no!
Making literal stab marks in your skin back then exposed your body to tons of different
infections and only the strongest cavemen with the best health and immune systems were
able to survive it.
This ability to withstand infection and bodily harm signals to potential female mates, that
you’re healthy and strong and would produce good offspring, and it showed potential rivals
that you’re not the type of dude to be fucked with.
Now I’m not saying to go out and get a tattoo just to impress a girl, that’s stupid, unless
of course it’s a Based Zeus tattoo haha….
But what I am saying is, if you already have one, then show that shit off baby, because
if not, you’re leaving pussy on the table!
#2 A salon-grade hairstyle and haircut.
Now you’re probably thinking, “oh zeus, obviously a nice haircut makes you more attractive,
that’s dumb!” well listen here motherfucker, 99% of guys don’t have the best haircut
they could have and it’s losing them beauty points in the process.
Most guys don’t understand face shapes, what hairstyles look best based on your face
shape, hair color, hair type, and tons of other factors.
So what you want to do is go see a professional who does this shit every day, and knows exactly
what they’re talking about.
A lot of times, barber shops can be a bit too casual and it’s hard to find a good
one, so here’s the zeus master plan for you to get a dope ass haircut, every time
baby.
You want to start by finding the most expensive and high end salon in your area, and then
you want to book an appointment with one of their best hair stylists, preferably someone
who focuses on men’s hair.
Then you want to have them suggest you the best haircut and style for you based on your
face shape, hair type, and all that other shit.
Once you’re happy with what they suggest and you get the haircut, you want to take
A FUCK TON of pictures of it.
Like take pictures of it from every single angle and make sure you have them saved.
Then, in 2 weeks, go to your normal barber, show him all the pictures of your last haircut
and have him recreate it.
2 weeks is short enough so that the shape of the hair will be relatively the same so
your barber can see how it was done before.
And 2 weeks is long enough so that you could probably use a slight trim to get it cleaned
up.
And boom, you’ve now just shown your barber how to give you a salon grade level haircut
and paid significantly less than having to shell out a ton of money, every time you go
to the salon.
You’re welcome.
#3 Super white teeth.
You ever meet someone who has like celebrity level white teeth and you’re just like “holy
shit, that motherfucker has some white ass teeth!”
Yeah, you know what I’m talking about…
When their teeth are so white you can’t stop looking at them?
Well what’s stopping you from getting white teeth like that and boosting your hotness
points?
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#4 Having a tan
You know how bodybuilders always become either orange as fuck, or bronze as fuck for their
bodybuilding competitions?
Well, that’s because having a tan increases the contrast of your musculature and makes
your muscles on your body look WAAAAAAAAAYY more defined.
This added definition makes you appear bigger, leaner, and stronger.
I’ve mentioned that having a tan can make you look more aesthetic before but I never
realized how much this makes a difference until recently.
A few weeks ago, I was chilling on Mercury in between a marathon orgy I had with the
goddesses on Venus, and since Mercury is way closer to the Sun, I noticed I got pretty
tan while hanging out there.
When I came back to Earth for my 4th orgy of the day, I was immediately swarmed by all
the girls in the Playboy Mansion.
They all commented on how much more muscular I looked, and how I looked way better with
my tan!
Now I’m not telling you to go sit in the sun all day and risk sun-damage to your skin
just for some extra pussy, but if you’re spending a lot of time out in the sun anyways,
and you have a tan, then be sure to take a few extra Instagram pictures with your shirt
off because the difference it’ll make will be huge.
#5 Well-groomed eyebrows.
Now, when I see you want to have well-groomed, I want to emphasize the importance of making
sure they look natural because otherwise you’re gonna end up looking like one of those dude
makeup artists with the crazy eyebrows drawn on and then at that point you might as well
put glitter on your face and eye shadow and the rest of that shit!
Now I’m not hating on the make up guys, hell they’re making so much money they’re
balling nicely and I respect it, but if you follow their makeup advice, you’re not gonna
be winning any hotness points from the ladies.
The best way I’ve found to get the best eyebrow game is to occasionally get them done
professionally.
Eyebrows are something that are too difficult to properly take care of yourself.
Now if you’re a guy whose naturally blessed with good eyebrows then hey, skip this tip,
but if you’re not then this tip can SERIOUSLY make you look way more attractive.
Eyebrows are the only part of the face you can change without plastic surgery, so use
this to your advantage and make sure they’re looking bomb.
When you go to get them done, emphasize to the person that you want them to just look
clean and groomed, you DON’T want them to be shaped and feminine looking.
You want them to look natural.
I’d even go so far as to show them pictures of how you want them to look, and show them
pictures of what you DON’T want.
I’ll have some examples on screen now.
And that my disciples is it.
In summary:
Tattoos A salon grade haircut
White ass teeth Having a tan
And well-groomed eyebrows.
And don’t forget to hit the link in the description to check out Ollie at a dope discount,
and get your smile the whitest it’s ever been.
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it.
Now, Zeus out!