( music playing )
As you know, Etsy is a place to buy handmade stuff.
by people who are really great at making terrible things.
But did you know that Etsy has lots of unique handmade bras,
or as the French call them-- bras?
I did.
I'm gonna see if Link can tell
which bras are actually-- I used to say braw.
- I mean, I gotta be-- - Braw.
I said braw until, like, seven years ago.
But we're gonna see--
I'm gonna tell you about two different braws--
- Braws. - And then you're going to tell me
which one is real,
and then I 'm going to tell you
- which one is real. - Got it.
And then if you get three of these right,
you win something that rhymes with bra.
Actually, you just win one of the bras that we're gonna talk about.
Oh, not a spa? Dang it.
That's what you were thinking about?
Yeah, I am a bra expert.
Okay, which one of these is on sale on Etsy?
But I'm not an expert at removing them.
Okay, thanks for that.
A Doughnut Sprinkle Custom Bra
featuring two frosted doughnuts on the cups
with pink icing dripping from the bra,
that will make your eyes glaze.
Or Cereal Bra,
which is covered in dried breakfast cereal
with two oranges on the bra cups,
representing a healthy balanced breakfast.
What?
Which one's actually sold on Etsy?
You almost got me excited about a cereal bra.
- But then you added oranges to it? - Oranges. yeah.
Well, I didn't add the oranges.
'Cause a doughnut sprinkle custom bra is like,
man, I can see a Katy Perry music video right now with that.
Mm-hm, I can see one of those just... like that.
I've always got a Katy Perry music video
in the back of my mind.
Well-balanced breakfast with cereal.
Man, I think you made up the cereal one
to tempt me into choosing it.
So the doughnut one is real.
Let's show him the real one.
You're right, Link! Look at them doughnuts!
I am. Trust me.
I'm only looking at the doughnuts.
Well, it's on a mannequin.
Yeah. And, ladies, if you're nursing,
the doughnuts can be cream filled.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's optional.
Got one right.
Show me another brover the shoulder broder holder.
Oh, goodness, what?
Over the shoulder brover holder.
It's bolder holder.
Over the shoulder bover holder.
Which one of these is real?
A Spice Rack Bra, where the cups are sprinkled
with actual spices including bay leaves,
black peppercorns, red pepper flakes,
and Mediterranean oregano.
Sounds stupid.
Or Crochet Mitten Bra
that serves not only as a bra but also as mittens,
so you can keep your hands warm inside the cups.
So if you open your oven,
then you can, like, grab something out of it with your bra?
Well, those are oven mitts.
These are just mittens for uh...
When it's cold outside.
- Oh-- - Which one's real--
Spice Rack Bra, Crochet Mitten Bra?
First of all, I'm making the Cereal Bra and I'm making the Oven Mitt Bra.
- Okay. - That's on me, y'all.
You can't have it.
Crochet Mitten. Crochet Mitten seems like total Etsy Lane.
Show him if he's right.
You're right, Link! Look at that!
Are those hands?
Now that-- I believe that is a man behind a mannequin.
- First of all, I think you're supposed to put your own hands - Own hands.
...on your own breasts.
Typically, keep your own hands to your own breasts.
- This is not model. - I'm not sure I consent.
I just picture him carrying around that mannequin torso
everywhere he goes,
like, "This is my friend Tina."
I hope you don't mind if I brought her along.
Please do not give voice to this man.
Which one of these is right?
Battleship Board Game Bra,
which is encrusted with a plastic grid
with white and red pegs
and features two battleships
on the cups,
or the Willy Wonka Candyland Bra,
iced with swirls of taffy
and a big lollypop
for a splash of sweetness
Splash of sweetness!
Which one is it, man?
Did you get pinched...
- Sweetness. - ...when you said "sweetness"?
I've always said "sweetness" like that.
- You know, a Candyland bra... - Mm-hm.
I can see how someone in their garage could make that.
But, I mean, I can also see you walking into your garage,
someone discarded a Battleship game.
Lots of discarded battleships out there.
"Hey, we should turn that into a bra."
It's got great supportive qualities.
Um, this is a toss--
Well, I think I wanna guess Willy Wonka, which--
but my instincts are telling me
I should go big or go home.
I'm saying, Battleship is real.
Let's see if he's right?
Wrong! That is not Battleship that I've ever played, Link.
That is the Candyland Bra.
This is what happens when kids grow up hearing they're good at art.
Stop telling them that. They're not.
They suck at it.
Maybe, like, one out of a hundred is good.
That's not a bra. That's a bad swimsuit.
Show me another one.
You almost were gonna get the sweep,
but now you got just--
now it's just everything's hanging in the balance.
Yeah. Well, it's not hanging too low, thank goodness.
That's right. Which one of these is real--
the Money Bra, containing actual cash,
but no coins because it's not common "cents"...
or Bra-And-Order Bra,
featuring oversized stainless steel handcuffs
placed over the cups?
Get it?
Not yet but I have ordered it.
Ah... yeah.
Money Bra or Bra-And-Order Bra?
I mean, handcuffs, underwear, they're both--
I know where you're going with that.
- I passed-- - That can be--
I passed shops like that.
- Right. - Don't go in.
I pass them.
'Cause a money bra.
To buy a bra that already had money in it
and you're paying money for it,
it seems like they would say, like, "Add your own money."
I don't think you can buy money with money, is what I'm saying.
- Okay. So-- - Not even on Etsy.
- So your guess is B? - Bra-And-Order Bra.
- Bra-And-Order Bra? - Show those handcuffs!
Let's see it.
No, it is the Money Bra, man!
Look at them ones!
How do you-- How does that-- Is that upside down?
Do you need to see breasts in it?
Can we get the breast filter?
I don't have trouble imagining breasts in that, honestly.
Okay.
Incidentally, this is Trump's plan
to fix the gender wage gap.
The gap's right there?
Okay, next one.
Link, you've just fallen off the wagon, man.
Which one of these is real?
The Persian Cat Bra,
featuring densely and incredibly warm cat fur,
or the silky satin lining
for those cold winter nights,
or the Knit Dog Bra,
made specially for those dogs
that need that extra support?
You're telling me there's a bra
that a dog wears?
D-D-D-Dog?
Maybe.
If you get it right, you win.
If not, I get to wear this bra.
But the Persian Cat Bra is a woman wears Persian cat fur--
- Cat fur. - ...that's fake.
Is it real Persian cat fur?
Because it can't be.
It's not cat skin. It's cat fur.
You get the fur off of the cat.
- Shedded. - Cats shed all the time,
shedding everywhere.
But dogs, pregnant dogs,
have lots of teats that hang very low.
- Lots. - You need to, like, gather them up.
I think it's, like, 24 teats.
You need to really gather them up,
so, um,
I think it's a bra for a pregnant dog,
Knit Dog Bra.
Let's see if he's right.
You're right, Link! There it is!
-
There's nothing worse when you can see
the nipples of a dog through its shirt.
I've always said that.
The only picture we've got of a bra in action
had a dog in it.
Put your hand through this side...
- Oh, seriously? - ...and a hand through this side.
- You made this? - No.
You ordered it. I remember.
This is the Candyland Bra we just talked about.
This is the one that's a swimsuit. Hey.
You look great. Congratulations, Link.
Thank you. You know what time it is.
You know--
Oh, my gah--
- I'm Gwen. - And I'm Dan.
- I'm Michael. - And this is Saoirse.
We're at the most northwestern point
in the continental U.S.
Cape Flattery.
And it's time to spin
the Wheel of Mythicality.
The kids look so happy!
Click the bottom link
to watch this episode from the beginning.
And click the top link
to watch us taste some sub sandwich shop cookies
in "Good Mythical More," and rate them.
And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality's gonna land.
Rhett:
you'll wanna buy it twice.
Get our GMM T-shirt in gray and blue,
available at mythical.store.