Come and gather with me beneath the learning tree, for you are the soil and my knowledge
is the seed which I will now spill upon you.
You seem so comfortable and natural in your videos.
You obviously enjoy it.
How long have you wanted to be on camera?
Mitchell C. Gelderfordsham
If you looked like this, wouldn’t you want to be on camera?
But when did I first realize it?
Probably when I was a kid.
I was maybe five or six years old.
My parents were shopping for a new car, and we were walking through the sales lot, and
they just so happened to be shooting a commercial there that day.
Well, most directors of local TV ads wouldn’t recognize a good shot if it hit ‘em right
between the eyes, but this one knew a good thing when he saw it, and he turned the camera
on us.
A few weeks later, I was watching our local station and there I was.
Me.
On TV.
I knew then what my destiny was.
And a mere twenty some-odd years later, I fulfilled that destiny.
I never found out how big of a sales spike that car dealership got as a result of the
ad I was in, but I’m pretty sure they owe me some money.
If they’re still in business.
How much of your on-camera persona is you, and how much is just a character?
Manuela Wakabayashi
It’s all me.
Strength, confidence, self-possession.
You couldn’t possibly fake being this amazing.
How do you deal with online harassment?
Dizzy Stenchelfine
You can’t let it bother you.
That’s the main thing.
People say all kinds of things on the internet trying to get to you, trying to hurt your
feelings.
You gotta have a thick skin.
Don’t let it bother you.
And when someone does do something that crosses a line, you can mute them, or block them,
or report them.
Go through the proper channels to take care of this kind of thing.
And don’t get all worked up about it.
For example, look at this: I got a notification from Twitter just now about an account I reported
for harassment a few weeks ago.
Probably just a heads-up to tell me the account has been banned.
Let’s see what it says.
“We reviewed the account you reported and found no violations of our rules.”
What the hell?!
How is that—?!
The fuck?
This will not stand.
Fortunately, I have the phone number of Twitter’s corporate headquarters.
I’m taking this all the way to the top.
Yes, hello, would you connect me to Jack, please?
. . . Steve Shives.
I’m a Twitter user.
Over twelve THOUSAND followers, so I’m kind of a big deal.
. . . Thank you.
Putting me right through.
She knows what’s up.
Jack?
Steve Shives.
That’s @steve_shives.
Got a little problem here, Jack.
Hoping you can help me out.
I reported a tweet awhile back that was obviously harassment, and I just got a notification
that says it doesn’t violate Twitter’s rules.
What are we gonna do about this?
Sure.
The tweet says, and this is an exact quote: “Your last video sucked.”
. . . That’s it.
. . . What do you mean, that doesn’t constitute harassment?
Who the fuck are they to say that to me?!.
. . Well, what the hell am I supposed to do?
. . . Because that video didn’t suck — it was awesome!
Who are they to tell me it sucks?
Let’s see them produce a forty-eight minute video essay detailing all the reasons Jimmy
Smits should have played Batman!
How would they feel if they made that video and I told them that it sucked.
I mean, theirs would have sucked, but that’s not the point.
This is some bullshit!
I never would have expected Jack Dorsey to be this worthless!
. . . Well, then who are you?
. . . Who the fuck is Jack Shempley?
. . . No, there’s nothing else you can do for me today!
Do you believe this shit?
. . . Hey, it’s Steve Shives again.
I called a few minutes ago.
You remember me?
. . . You remember how I asked you to connect me to Jack?
. . . Well, which fucking Jack did you think I meant?
. . . Why would you assume I meant Jack Shempley?
I had no idea who Jack Shempley was until like thirty seconds ago.
. . . Can you put me through to Jack Dorsey, please?
. . . Why not?
. . . So?
Call him in Sedona . . . They don’t have cell service in sweat lodges?!