Sometimes things don't go right. Sometimes you
make mistakes. Sometimes the situation isn't
always roses and daisies. And that's okay. The
real solution to having less stress at work and to
feeling so blah and stressed down all the time
about wor is...
Hello, welcome back to my channel where I help you
slay your career and cultivate the successful life
you deserve. For the best career advancement
advice, make sure and click the subscription
button and the notification bell I released two
new videos each week. Are you feeling stressed AF
at work? If you are, this video is exactly for
you. I'm making just for you. My friend stress at
work is totally normal. We all have it, it is
something that always exists. But especially right
now with everything going on in the world, all of
our stress might be feeling a little bit more
elevated. So in today's video, I wanted to share
with you some simple strategies on how you can
handle stress at work. And in life. My most
important strategy is going to be the last one
that we talk about. So make sure that you stay all
the way through. If you're ready to learn my
stress relief tips so that you can have less
stress at work, let's tap that like button, and
The first tip that I have for you to handle stress
at work is to breathe. I know this sounds really
dumb because it's really obvious. Like, you're
breathing right now I bet. I hope you are! The
power of breathing is that simply taking a really
nice deep breath can be something that helps move
you from a reactive state where positive things
don't always happen into a more active state where
you can react accordingly. And with less stress,
if we look into the science behind it, there's a
couple of different things at play. First of all,
if you're facing acute stress, which I'm going to
come back to in just a minute, you are going to be
having an amygdala response. That's your fight
flight or freeze. It's the most primitive area of
our brain from when we were cavemen and we were
facing challenges like saber toothed tigers. Now,
you probably won't find many of those lurking
around at work. However, your reaction to any
stress of work is essentially the same, taking
time to breathe is actually going to allow the
chemical in your brain that actually unaccept
amygdala response time to dissipate so that you
can move into your logic center of your brain. The
other component is our brain just needs oxygen,
especially if we are going to be doing some deep
thinking. We want to be thoughtful in our actions,
especially if we are in a very stressful
situation, we are going to be able to think better
and act better when we have that oxygen for our
brain. So really, breathing is always your friend
on a day to day basis. But especially in times of
stress, know when you are taking that moment to
breathe, one of the things that I want you to be
asking yourself is moving into my second tip to
handle stress at work. And that is getting to the
root of the problem. The question I want you to
sincerely think about an answer for yourself here
is:
What is the real problem here? The thing that
we're feeling stressed about and maybe feeling
anxious, or reactive or having conflict about
might not actually be the source of the problem,
it might just be the straw that broke the camel's
back. Or it might be the thing that's in front of
us that we can actually identify. For example, one
of the ways that I've seen this play out with my
clients in the real world is having a lot of
stress about inbox management. They're being
bombarded in their inbox with action items and
things to do. And they have to reply to this and
do this and think about that. So yeah, it's their
inbox stressing them out. But what is actually
underlying that stress is that they don't feel
like they're in control. If this sounds a little
bit familiar drop, and I relate down in the
comments below. One of the things that I think
especially when I work one on one with my clients
that always surprises people is that they're
usually coming because there is a problem, there
is an obstacle, but it's often deeper than what we
actually think it is. So in till we get to the
point where we really understand the problem,
we're not going to be able to solve for it. And
that means that we're going to have stress, we
resolve that thing, we are going to feel that
stress in a different way. Now this one I know
it's a lot easier said than done. But I promise
you that investing time into this step is going to
be something that is really helpful.
For my next tip to handle stress at work, I want
to come back to something that I mentioned
earlier, which was talking about acute stress.
And that is that you need to consider perspective.
And there's a couple of layers to this. So let's
dive into it. There's two questions that I have
for you, to help you gain perspective about your
stress at work. The first is, is the stress about
thing. So often when we're talking about stress,
it's a bad thing. And we're talking about all the
negative impacts of stress. And you know, we feel
so stressed down and as soon as someone says that
they're stressed, we automatically know that
that's a bad thing. But the thing is that stress
can be a good thing. If we actually look at it
from the psychology behind stress. There are three
different types of stress. One is good, two or
bad.
The first kind of stress is you stress, this is
good stress.
This is the stress that is motivating us.
So sometimes if we're thinking about our stress,
and maybe we are feeling a little bit insecure or
we're facing a little bit of imposter syndrome on
a project that we're Working on the thing is that
this isn't always a bad thing, this stress can
actually really motivate us to invest our
attention, our energy and our best effort to
accomplish the outcome that we're really going
for. And with all this good stress, we might not
actually come into it with the gousto, that we're
coming with it now that we're quite honestly a
little bit terrified that we're in over our heads.
On the other hand, we have the bad stressors, we
have acute stress, and this is actually triggered
by an event. So think about, you get a call from
an unhappy customer, or unclear instructions from
your boss, and there is a tight deadline to meet
it. And you're not sure what you're even supposed
to be doing. These are acute stressors, they're
kind of sudden and instantaneous, then we also
have chronic stress. And there are different types
of chronic stress that you might experience at
work. One great example. And I know one that many
of you guys that watch my videos have actually
faced or are facing is being in a toxic work
environment. Chronic stress is the stress that is
always present. For example, if you have a toxic
manager, that stress of having them is constant,
even though there is going to be also acute
stressors, which they bring into your world. Now
one thing that can be interesting, and it's not
true in all cases, but I want you to be open about
it. And I want you to consider it for those bad
stressors that you have in your life. Sometimes
our bad stressors might actually be a good
stressor in disguise. Like maybe that bad boss
that we're dealing with is really giving us the
motivation, when we kind of are stuck in our
careers to take that next step to either get the
promotion or our dream job. And let's just face
it, anytime that we have the opportunity in life
to take lemons and make a delicious lemon teeny,
we need to drink that shit up. The other question
that I have regarding perspective for you is,
does this really matter? And be honest with
yourself your if you come back to this stressful
situation in a year? Are you really gonna care
about it? I think in our day to day jobs, we just
get so entrenched in the things that we're doing.
And we end up getting really stressed over benign
things. Because of course, all of the little
things add up to the really big things. But in the
sequence of events, is this something that is
going to really, truly have impact on your career
and in your life? If the answer is yes, then yeah,
it's pretty much a valid stressor. But if it's
something that a year from now isn't really going
to matter, then maybe you can stress out a little
bit less about it.
And this brings me into my next tip to handle
stress at work.
And that is to regain control. Especially if
you're a control freak like me, one of the easiest
ways to fuel an enormous amount of stress is to
not be in control of a situation. In my opinion,
if you are not in control, you are in chaos. And
when you're in chaos, things start to take out
through your life, this doesn't mean that things
are completely off the hook and that you're
reckless and things like that. Really chaos just
means that you aren't in control of your actual
day. And the things that are happening because
this means that you can't be sure you can be
confident that you're going to achieve your career
goals. or even your to do list today, when you
have a stress at work. Ask yourself this question,
what can I control? And this is no way insinuating
that you have control over all of the things you
really don't you're dealing with other people
unless you work all by yourself, and then you're
just stressing yourself out. But that's probably
not the situation, you're probably dealing with
your boss, with coworkers, with other teams, with
customers with partners. But in this stressfull
situation, which is causing us stress at work,
what are you actually in control of if the stress
is more aggregate I didn't, because of a lot of
things, one of the things that I do encourage you
to consider is establishing some work life
boundaries if you haven't already done so. Because
when we think about things like dealing with
difficult coworkers and your inbox taking over
your life, or you feel like you're working all of
the time, and that's the thing that's causing you
stress at work, this is something that can be
fixed for it. Now, when we think about the chronic
stressors, like the nonstop email notifications,
work taking over your life, dealing with toxic co
workers are their work life boundaries that you
can set that will help alleviate them. And then of
course, in a more acute situation, think about the
things that you are actually in control of when
you have a stressful situation at work, there is
going to be a ton of stuff that isn't in your
control, that it's totally up to other people who
they decide to be what they do in this situation.
But you can always control the things that you are
in control of this includes your energy, your
effort, your workplace boundaries, all of these
things really add up. And when you're clear on
what you can control, it actually helps you
release the stress and worry an anxiety about all
of the things that you aren't in control of that
are stressing you out at work.
And this actually brings me directly into the next
point.
And this is one of the things that if you're
trying to handle stress at work, i
t's a step that seems really obvious.
But so many people miss this one.
And that is to do a priority check. I can't tell
you how many times I've spoken to a client that is
just stressing themselves and running them into
the ground over something really tiny. That either
wasn't something that was the most important
thing, or didn't really have a huge impact. When
we don't understand how things are prioritized at
our company, on our team. And for ourselves, it's
really easy to enter a state of overwhelm, because
then you just have all of this stuff to do. And
that creates a lot of stress at work. However,
when you know exactly what you should be focusing
on the impact that you are supposed to be having
and how you can best have an impact at work. This
allows you to focus on all of those things. It
also makes you feel a lot better about the things
that you don't need to stress out about because
you don't really maybe even need to do or at least
don't need to do right now. This is honestly one
of the things that knowing your unique awesomeness
quotient, your UAQ has a huge impact on if you
don't already know your UAQ, I want you to
register for my workshop and check it out after
you watch this video. Because I'm going to help
you figure that out so that you know what your
priorities are. Ultimately, if you cannot escape
stress at work, why not just stress over the right
things that are actually going to move your career
forward and are going to bring you satisfaction in
your career.
My next tip is one that has nothing to do with my
channel. But it's something I feel like it's been
coming up more and more in my videos. And it is
because it has such an enormous impact on our well
being and on our stress levels. If you want to
cope with stress at work, I highly recommend that
you find a way to get some exercise in now this
isn't all about like doing some like crazy high
intensity hit training, or you know getting really
ripped or anything like that. Not at all unless
that's your thing. Because when I'm talking about
exercise here, it's not about looking hot. And
it's not even necessarily about all of the health
benefits that exercise actually offers you it's
because exercise is actually going to give you
three immediate benefits. First of all, when you
exercise when you move your body, you are going to
decrease your levels of stress hormones,
adrenaline and cortisol. The second immediate
impact that exercise has is that if you change
your scenery, it changes your mind, especially if
you're facing a different work problem. Something
as simple as going for a walk and just seeing
different things. And getting some clarity is
going to be what actually gets you through that
stress at work, or just makes you feel a little
bit better so that you can tackle it when you get
back to the office or to your home office. And the
third isn't necessary. But most of the time when I
talk about exercise and something like going for a
walk or going for a good run if you're me. And
this is something that just getting outside and
breathing in, you know, nice, clean air, hopefully
it's clean air unless you're in New York City like
me which case it's you know, massive minnows. But
nonetheless, getting outside especially into that
nice, cold crisp fall air that we have right now
is pointing me something that feels really, really
good and decreases your stress levels. And I
promise you, I'm not becoming a health and fitness
channel. But this is something that especially
like for me in terms of stress management, the
best way that I am managing my stress throughout
my career has been through exercise. And once you
have that habit, it becomes the first thing that
you do. And if you're going to go to any vice, in
a stressful situation, exercise is a lot better
than a lot of the other vices that we might have
like my number two vice which is Jen getting back
to something a little bit more traditional and
less sweaty, is my next tip to help you handle
stress.
And that is to commit to either your next step or
to change if your work stress is because you were
absolutely miserable your job you hate your
company or in a toxic workplace, then you need to
commit to actually changing that situation. And
then you commit to your next step. Or if you're
more into a scenario of acute stress, just
identifying what you are going to do next, or what
you can learn from the situation is going to be
something that is immensely immensely helpful. I
think it's really easy when we're feeling stressed
out at work to just kind of stay in that place. I
know it sounds really ridiculous. But doing
nothing is a lot easier than doing something even.
And probably even especially if you're feeling
kind of miserable because of the stress that you
have at work.I'm sure when you actually start
actioning those changes or taking those steps,
you're going to feel a lot better and your stress
level is going to alleviate especially as you get
closer to resolving the actual cause of stress at
work. And this brings me into my last tip to
handle stress at work. And that was to stop being
so hard on yourself. So many of my clients that I
know so many of you are just your perfectionist at
heart and I know because and I know how hard it is
when you just want to be your best bring your best
and really succeed in every single situation. But
you know what, sometimes things don't go right.
Sometimes you make mistakes. Sometimes the
situation is isn't always roses and daisies, and
that's okay. The real solution to having less
stress at work and to feeling so blah and stress
d out all the time about work is to actually tak
some of the pressure off of yourself. And whe
you're ambitious, and when you're tenacious, thi
is so much easier said than done. Trust me on thi
one. But the easier that you can go in yoursel
and really seeing that your career success journe
is a marathon. It's not a sprint. It makes a lo
of stressful situations that you're facing at wor
or career obstacles that you're trying to navigat
so much easier. And I think one of the ways tha
we can really do this is to make sure that we ar
cultivating a positive attitude, because whe
things don't go your way, and especially if you'r
a perfectionist by nature, just like me, it'
really easy to feel defeated when things don't g
right or don't go the way that you're expectin
them to go. However, when you cultivate tha
positive mindset, it allows you to see th
opportunity in every situation, which i
ultimately going to be something that elevate
your career. If you haven't already watched it,
I want you to go and check out this video to
cultivate a more positive attitude at work.
If this video was helpful, make sure and give it a
thumbs up. This is something that really does help
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appreciate when you give it a thumbs up. As always
my friends thank you so much for watching. I
really appreciate you being here. I hope you found
it helpful and I will see you in the next video.
Bye for now.