You'll be surprised at how common are couples formed not with one, but two grandiose narcissists
at the same time.
Harry and Meghan are a good example for reasons that you're about to find out:
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It would be hard to imagine how a relationship like this could work.
We usually think that any narcissist needs an enabler, or at least someone that becomes
a permanent source of supply, which is the narcissist's fuel.
But two narcissists can become a couple, especially if they both are grandiose narcissists.
In extremely simplistic terms, they become each other's enabler.
And no, there is still no empathy in a relationship like this.
They don't actually care about one another, beyond the fact that they understand each
other perfectly.
And it works... for some time, because their source of supply, the attention and popularity
that they want, resides outside the couple.
In the case of Harry and Meghan, they noticed that once they got the public attention, that
was something that they absolutely wanted to repeat over and over again.
Now, don't get me wrong.
A relationship between two grandiose narcissists is still dysfunctional.
If there is no empathy, there will be absolutely no regard for each other's emotions, so fights
can become really vicious, and I'm not talking about physical, but a psychological way.
As long as they realize that their public dynamic still brings the attention that they
desperately crave, they will stay together.
This is essentially a mutual exploitation.
Because the two narcissists will not trust each other.
And if you are wondering, how can a couple like this have anything remotely related to
INtimacy, without trust?
Well, that's my question too.
Harry and Meghan must have noticed that they could play many games with the media.
And the Oprah interview is the perfect dynamic for two narcissists to combine their thirst
for attention in the most pathetic way.
Because they did not care if people were going to disprove what they said, and people DID,
and they did not care if they would look hypocritical, and they did, and they did not care if they
would look entitled and absurd, as long as they could break the internet and get all
the attention possible.
There is a very good reason the Oprah interview was pulled off the internet, absolutely deleted
into non existence, just 30 days after it was aired.
And I have to make a special video about that reason.
I know that I used to say that they had a toxic relationship, but I was wrong about
the kind of toxic relationship.
It's not that Meghan has been manipulating Harry, or that Harry took advantage of Meghan.
It's like both scenarios coexist.
Because Harry wanted to leave his royal duties, but with a bang.
And he got what he wanted.
He just couldn't stand his brother William, or his father, or even Catherine.
That's why he made that open, public attack.
And Meghan wanted to be worldwide famous, and she got it.
It's a symbiotic relationship that led to Megxit.
And speaking of that, Megxit is the perfect example of how a narcissist treats a divorce.
It is quite hard to divorce a narcissist, because if you're still the main source of
their narcissistic supply, then they would use every tactic in the book to reel you in,
again.
But when divorce is inevitable, something switches inside them.
They are going to use it in the most spectacular way possible to victimize themselves.
Megxit is the perfect example of a 'narcissistic divorce', because the narcissist, or in this
case, the narcissistic couple, is going to play every possible card to smear you.
In this case, the Royal Family.
And again, the Oprah interview portraits exactly how a narcissist puts you in a situation which,
if you don't defend yourself or don't argue with their toxic claims, then you're seen
as like you're accepting, or agreeing with, whatever they say about you.
And if you answer, or make a statement about how their claims are false, you will feel
like you're being forced into clearing yourself, even if you're absolutely sure you don't need
to clear anything.
That must be one of the reasons Oprah no longer wants to be associated with them.
Because they used her.
They used her platform for a vicious attack, just like a narcissist attacks their spouse
publicly to humiliate them, while presenting themselves as victims.
Trying to convince the world that you're insane.
Now, I'm about to give you one of the most important tools that you MUST use if you find
yourself entangled with a narcissist, and you want to terminate the relationship.
If you're divorcing a narcissist, you have to document every single thing, every single
action, text message, phone call, event, because it will not only be helpful to present your
case legally, but also because these toxic personalities will absolutely make you doubt
your own memory with gaslighting.
That's the big advantage Meghan and Harry had in this case.
"Recollections may vary", is as far as the Queen would go.
And that's why Catherine did not clear things up about who made who cry.
That would be lowering yourself to the attacks of the narcissist.
And that's what the narcissist wants.
They want a knee jerk reaction.
They want you to lose your temper, especially if there is people around, if there is an
audience.
They want everyone to believe that you're the villain of this story.
And they are really good at it, in fact.
It's extremely important to document the whole process, up to the tiniest details.
Because that way you can backtrack and reference exact moments and interactions so you don't
rely on your memory when defending yourself against their claims.
And second, documenting the process is a form of self therapy.
Just trying to deal with a narcissist, let alone divorcing them, is going to leave you
diSORiented and confused about yourself, about your own value, and undermine your relationships.
I mean any kind of relationship.
Unless, of course, you make your own map to navigate, documenting everything, and with
the help of a counselor or therapist.
But again, I cannot stress you enough how important is to document everything.
Now you might have a question about these two, just out of curiosity and not because
you actually care.
Do these kind of relationships last?
The answer, again, is not that simple but as long both keep getting whatever supply
they get from other people, and don't mind enabling each other, it can last years.
Provided, of course, that there are no obstacles and frictions such as finances.
Because, if a healthy couple that feels empathy for each other, and built a relationship on
trust and respect could have real trouble in case of financial hardships, then you can
imagine how toxic can it get if there is absolutely no empathy and no trust, because they will
be constantly looking over their shoulder, and blaming each other.
Yes, that is a really miserable way to live, and the worst part is if they have children.
Because no matter if a child becomes the scapegoat, or the one that gets the blame for everything,
or the golden child, that is the one that gets all the praise, they will feel like aliens
compared with other children and their healthy families.
But if you ask me especifically about Meghan and Harry, there is one thing for certain.
Nobody can go through life using and discarding people for too long, and in such a public
fashion like these two.
Because there comes a time when the public just gets bored with them.
And, most probably they will not stop making headlines, just for being related to the royal
family.
That is not something that will stop anytime soon.
The question is, what will they get, besides attention?
And attention could be capitalized, as many influencers do.
But for that, you have to make it a business.
And any business needs collaboration and cooperation and trust between the partners.
If there is no empathy as a couple, there will not be as business partners either.
That's why, when it was suggested that Meghan and Harry would split their brands to be more
independent from each other, I said that this was a great idea.
And now you can see the problem for yourself.
They brought all this attention to themselves because they complemented their victimhoods
perfectly.
Would it keep working if they separate their brands?
Well, let's make a very simple and fun exercise.
Imagine that you separate them, and you stop seeing 'Meghan and Harry' or 'Harry and Meghan'
everywhere.
When you separate them, their victimhood loses its grip, because you break the symBIOtic
relationship.
The big question is, which value remains after that?
What are they really bringing to the table?
What is the substance behind all this attention grabbing?
I'm sure you can come up with a really good answer in the comments.
If you want to refine your observation skills, all you have to do is download my 100+ body
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My name is Jesús Enrique Rosas and it will always be a pleasure, my body language buddies!
Much Love, and Bliss.