So what you're saying is... yoo-hoo!
Has this ever happened to you?
(Martina) My arm is soaking wet! (Simon) Oh, you gotta come and snuggle...
You can pull it in more
How about this?
(Simon) Hug me. Okay we're safe like this... are you alright? (Martina) It doesn't feel practical...
Very practical right now
My ass is getting wet! I can feel it soaking through!
Oh man, umbrellas are the worst!
(Simon) No, you're getting me in the eye! (Martina) You should get higher
Hold on, how are we supposed to love each other this way?
(Simon) Walk forward. (Martina) You can go up, I can go down
(Simon) If you go down you're gonna get me in the eye!
Sharing umbrellas is impossible
But don't worry, we have the solution for you!
[infomercial music]
# love is... #
(Martina) You gotta, like... (Simon) Wait
(Martina) Is that right? (Simon) Is this how it's supposed to be?
(Martina) There's two sides! (Simon) Okay, all we gotta...
How does this lock, hold on.
(Martina) You didn't read the instructions! (Simon) Look, it's in-the-spanishes!
"Presiona el boton para abrir"
What the *baaa* is "abrir"?
(Martina) You can figure this out, I believe in you.
(Simon) Look, we're gonna get this right. Okay...
So you see this *baa* right here?
That should go up like that.
Hold on. Look, we got two umbrellas. That's good enough.
(Simon) Voilà! This was so easy! (Martina) Oh my, it's so big!
Wow, I can move so freely now!
Look at us, we're both getting coverage and we're showing people that we love each other!
This is incredible!
Sexy, free and single and ready to bingo?
It also works with friendships!
Yay! Friendshiiiiiip....
# secret lovers, that's what they all say... #
(Martina) Baby, get out of here! (Simon) Sure!
Friendshiiiip
Look at all these single umbrella suckers!
Loveless, with no joy or happiness or purpose in their lives
Oh god, no one loves you!
(Martina) # somebody really lonely # (Simon) All lonely, by yourself
(Martina) Keep moving! (Simon) Loverless person!
Loverless!
Okay so I think maybe we should have kept the instruction manual for this
because we do not seem to know how to open it. It's much more complicated than it seems.
You would think that you'd just pop it open and that's it, and it looks like that's it
but there's so much more to it.
(Martina) Okay so here's what I think happened.
I think they have a couple of loose floating spokes on the inside (Simon) Yeah.
And that's why you're supposed to open slowly in order to keep the center part tented like this.
(Simon) Yes, some of this looks really wrong. Like this spoke looks really bent and busted.
(Martina) But I don't think it's busted, Simon. I think it is not hooked on because it has to be able too unfold at the same time.
(Martina) That's what I think it's happening. (Simon) It still works, it still covers us.
(Martina) It works great! (Simon) It's not glorious as I expected it to be
But hey, now we can let the world know that we love each other!
I love this umbrella! I'm serious!
I'm going to use this umbrella because Simon is really tall and, when it rains, people in Korea all use umbrellas
(Martina) Everyone has an umbrella. (Simon) Except... here's the thing
If I'm 6'5, and everyone here is like 5'8, when they hold their umbrellas above their head it's really at my eye level
So I'm doing Matrixes around everyone's umbrellas so that I don't become cyclopes.
And then if I try to, like, stand besides Simon with my umbrella, it's exactly the same thing.
(Martina) So this is legitimately a great idea. (Simon) It is solving our problems.
So if you wanna validate your love, make sure you pick up this couple umbrella on Gmarket.
or else you're proving to your boyfriend/girlfriend that you don't actually love them.
You know what's pretty funny about this? We just realized we are filming and that today is Black Day.
We're walking around like the super in love couple on the most depressing single day of the year in Korea, so...
(Martina) You know what else I saw that we should get online? (Simon) What?
I saw an umbrella that has a cup holder built in!
(Martina) It's perfect for me if I had a coffee cup to hold, right? (Simon) Right?
It's amazing! We gotta find it. We could put a beer in it and make a really long straw!
And we're gonna have a beer umbrella!
Getting drunk in the rain!
Drunk drunk in the rain...
I'm thinking of a different song here.