Hey you guys I’m Jo Koy and this is my son, Little Jo.
Look at that. Look at that smile.
Ugh! Precious right?
This is Butt Of The Joke. That’s right, I’m gonna play some of the bits that I did
about him on my special and we’re gonna see how he reacts.
This kid has a debt card. He called me on a Wednesday one time and he was like
"Hey dad, there's only like forty cents left on my debt card."
And I was like "Oh, my God."
Go fuck yourself.
The only time I had a card is when I took my mom's credit card, and I used it without
her knowing.
The fuck did you eat on Monday, asshole? Filet mignon?
What you walk into the lunchroom like a fucking nightclub? Like, “Ahhhh chocolate milk’s
on this mother fucker! Let’s go!”
Dude. Have you thought about getting a job? Be honest.
Yeah.
Where?
Western Bagel.
My son’s about to turn 16 and he looked at me with the straightest look on his face
and he goes,
“Dad, I know what I want for my birthday.”
Go ahead and look at the camera, Jo, and tell them what you want. Say it.
A car.
I know. Tell them the name brand. Make and model. Go.
Porsche Macan.
Yeah. Go fuck yourself.
There’s a thing about 15 year-old boys, man.
He thinks he’s being slick, but he’s not.
Like Jo, I know what you did in there.
“What are you talking about, dad?”
Well I’m just saying like, I was 15, and I know what you did in there.
And you don’t care. That’s the thing. How many times do you take a shower a day?
Just be honest.
Like at least once.
What! You liar!
How do you know I didn’t take a shower, dad?
Jo, you were in there for 30 minutes. And your hair is dry.
At least I was like sly about it.
Like, I at least, like with my mom, I waited until she went to work.
But you don't give a shit!
It’s like right when we’re done eating dinner you’re like,
"I'm gonna take a shower.”
Bought you a big bottle of Head & Shoulders, and it’s empty.
But you still have dandruff.
I don’t...what…
It’s Head & Shoulders, Jo, not Dick in Hand.
We’re cool, right?
Yeah.
I’m not gonna shake your hand. After you just told the whole world that’s what you
do with your hand.
Are you out of your mind? Go buy a towel with your debit card.
This was the funniest thing you’ve ever done. And I had to talk about this on stage.
He’s got dark skin.
Right, he’s got the darker skin.
He’s been going to a lot of the football games from other schools and all the kids
are asking him if he’s half black.
He came up to me and he was like, “Dad, a lot of kids think I’m half black.” And
I’m like, “Alright, what’d you say?”
Yes.
What?? What the f-- Why would you do that?!
“I don’t know, they don’t know.” And I’m like, “Well how about when I come
and pick you up or something and they notice that you’re not half black?”
And he said, “Well, just don’t pick me up.”
Tell the camera what you told the teacher. She asked you what? How did you find out,
right?
Yeah.
And what did you say?
23andMe.
23andMe!!
Cause he saw a commercial and he’s like, “Hey dad, let’s get one of those DNA tests.”
Why do you want to get a DNA test? “Let’s just see. Maybe there’s black in the family,
dad.”
Right, and I go, “Jo. So you told your teacher you were lying, right?” And this is what
he says.
No.
They still think he’s a quarter black!
So I got it.
And we’re gonna do it.
And I hope, I don’t know. I hope it comes back black.
I don’t know.
If the results come back black, I’m just gonna be like, “Um,
get the fuck out of my house.
Go find your real dad. Who the fuck-- Who the fuck is this kid?”
I love this kid.