Whenever you're here, somehow we end up talking about dating.
Yeah.
And I have become, like, a celebrity matchmaker.
You know that, right?
Yeah, well, I-- yeah, I love that.
Yeah, so who would-- are you dating anyone?
Kinda not really, but.
Yeah, did Brad Pitt say something about me?
Is that what this is about?
Because I saw him Sunday.
I saw Brad Pitt on Sunday, and I squeezed him.
Is that what this is about?
Yeah, you squeezed him and then the security--
His face lit up, and then security was--
Yeah, they whisked him away.
Who are you-- is it Brad Pitt?
Who are you interested in?
Because let me see what I can do.
Well, you know, like, there's so many people.
There are a lot of people.
Yeah.
No, well, you know, you could hook me up with Brad.
I mean--
OK.
But we're just friends, Brad and I.
Don't start that rumor, Ellen.
OK.
It'll get bad.
Just-- just friends.
Just-- yeah, just Brad and I are just friends.
All right.
Brad Pitt.
What about-- why not go after the sexiest man in America?
I know, I mean, you gotta aim high, girl!
[CHEERING]
I mean, Idris Elba.
[SCREAM]
I mean-- Yes!
But I think he's taken.
Yeah.
Is he?
All right.
I don't know.
It's Hollywood.
They don't last, you know.
[LAUGHTER]
Line--
I'll be on that list.
--line up.
Yeah, yeah.
At least get yourself in there.
I know, I know.
Can you make an introduction?
I'll try.
All right.
I don't know when he's on the show next, but I love him.
I think he's fantastic.
I'm going to take a picture backstage
and just leave it there just so you won't forget.
And we'll put it in his dressing room,
and he'll like, oh, Octavia.
We'll just-- you know, we'll just put it in his head.
I love her.
Yeah.
I love you.
I love that idea.
So you were in Instant Family with my friend, Tig Notaro, who
is hilarious, Mark Wahlberg-- and I
understand because Mark always talks about these
like 4:00 AM workouts.
Yes.
And I heard that you did those with him.
I did one with him.
Oh, one.
I see.
I did one, and that was enough that I--
he really rubbed off on me though because I
was kind of stalking him on Instagram,
and I didn't think that it was real--
the waking up and working out at 4 o'clock.
You didn't think he was telling the truth?
I thought-- you know, like every other time,
but they really do get up every morning.
Yeah.
They really do go out there.
No, he does.
Yes, he does.
Yeah, so you did it once?
I did it once.
And how was that?
With him, and then I do it on Mondays with my trainer.
It was--
At 4:00 AM?
At 4:00 AM because Monday is the earliest day that they--
you know, on your schedule.
So that's my only 4:00 AM day.
Mark is in there every day.
I'm only in there on Monday.
Monday, one day.
But at least you're doing it.
Yes, yes
And did you learn some tricks from him, like, what he does?
You know, all seriousness-- well,
not all seriousness aside, all joking aside--
he is such a fitness guru that he actually
has helped me modify what I've been doing with my trainer.
And I love him for that because it's a--
fitness and weight loss is such a personal journey--
Is it.
--so if you have a god like that going, hey, let me help you.
You're like, thank you, God.
Yeah, yeah.
So Instant Family is a true story.
Yes.
I saw it a while back because, as I said, Tig's in it
and Mark's in it, but tell everyone what it's about.
Well, Mark Wahlberg and Rose Byrne
decide, you know, there are a couple,
and they decide they want to open
their home to a child in need.
And then Tig and I talk them into taking three kids.
So they go from one child to three in--
From zero.
--from zero-- from zero to three.
Yeah.
Like, that's called love.
Yeah.
All right.
I know that you're very competitive.
I heard that from Melissa McCarthy
that you're very, very competitive, as am I.
So we're going to play Five Second Rule after this.
It's a really good, it's good.
You know I've been working out?
Oh, that has--
[LAUGHTER]
Yeah.
I don't know that you're working out with that.
All right.
We're going to take a break.
We're taking a break.
All right.