Thanks for being here on my birthday show.
[APPLAUSE]
This is a cute picture.
Every day I come out, and there's something different
here.
This is me.
I don't know how old I was.
Come on, that's--
Anyway, it happened.
I'm now 60 years old.
[APPLAUSE]
I did it.
My actual birthday was on Friday.
Portia took me out for dinner that night
and then we had some lovely wine.
And then we-- well you know what happened.
[LAUGHTER] We played boggle, and then, um--
It's amazing that I'm 60.
It's even more amazing, I've been
doing this show for 15 years.
That's-- [APPLAUSE] really amazing.
And, just because I'm 60, I don't
plan on changing anything about the show.
Although today, we have to kind of wrap it
up quickly because I need to get home to see Wheel of Fortune.
[LAUGHTER]
It's supposed to be a big milestone.
They say, oh you're 60.
It's a big milestone.
It's-- to me it's not important.
I have never paid attention to numbers.
Which is-- it explains my crippling debt.
[LAUGHTER]
I was born in 1958.
It was a different time.
TV was black and white, presidents were only white.
[LAUGHTER] The Bachelor wasn't a TV show.
The bachelor was a word you'd describe
your 50-year-old uncle who just hadn't met the right lady.
[LAUGHTER]
Yea.
Some people are surprised that I'm 60, which is a compliment.
But I think there are a lot of people out there
who look great for their age.
Like, my friend Rob Lowe.
I think he never seems to age.
What about me?
[CHEERS]
What about me?
I forgot about you.
You forgot?
You suddenly forgot?
No.
You don't even know how old I am.
I don't.
Maybe I'm your age.
No, I'm not your age.
No, you're not as old as me.
I'm far away from being your age.
Hi Sophia.
What's the--
Hi, you will be wondering why I'm here.
Well, it's my birthday.
Well, yeah, happy birthday.
Yeah.
Yeah, I was wondering on my way here why I was coming here.
But then I realized it was your birthday.
Yes.
And I came here to help you celebrate.
OK.
Because-- I mean not that you need help celebrating.
But I wanted, you know, to help.
Because it's going to be such a fun day for you.
You're going to have a lot of surprises.
This going to be like um, like A Christmas Carol.
OK.
You know?
Christmas Carol day for you.
All of your-- all of your old friends.
Really?
Yeah, like your age are going to be here.
And new friends.
You're going to be like Ebenezer Scrooge.
Who?
You don't even know who that is.
It's an American, [LAUGHTER] famous, old person.
but I love you.
And I have something special for you, that's most important.
I didn't just come here to say happy birthday.
Hold on.
OK.
I-- it's something that you're going to really, really enjoy.
And that you're going to need.
OK.
She left.
She has nothing.
[LAUGHTER]
[HORN HONKING]
[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]
It's for you.
Hey.
Hey, wait.
This is-- you have to learn how to do it.
It's not that simple but--
OK.
You have to be careful.
You have a little key and everything.
Look at this.
And you can put your old people accessories here.
Like if you need like your glasses and--
What is this, coupons?
It's coupons.
[APPLAUSE]
Thank you so much.
Maybe you don't need it in the next 30 years, but you will.
I will.
So put like a little cover--
OK.
--and you will.
I love you.
Thank you so much for being here.
Go, go, go.
Try it.
OK.
[APPLAUSE]