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Hi everybody!
My name is Justin Stoney and I'm the founder of
New York Vocal Coaching here in New York City.
Welcome to episode 16 of Voice Lessons To The World.
The show where we want to answer your
questions about singing from all over the world.
And I'll give you a chance to ask questions later,
but our question for this week comes from Charles B. in Ontario Canada
and Charles writes, "Dear Justin, everybody says my voice is great,
my voice teachers, my friends, my family, they all love my voice.
However, I think I sound bad, I can't stop judging my voice.
Do you have any tips?"
Now Charles that's an awesome thing to bring up.
And I think that so many of us judge our voices
and this judgement can cause a limitation for us.
We know it causes frustration and lack of growth.
But a lot of us still always want to make good sounds.
We're afraid to make bad sounds
and we judge our voices all the time.
We think we sound bad.
So I hope I can help you sift through some of this today.
The first thing I want to bring up
is that you can't hear yourself properly.
That's right, you can't hear yourself right.
Now, part of the reason that I'm employed is because that's true.
If that was not true, I would be out on the street.
Because if you could just sit at home and sing
and say, oh well that sounded good I'm gonna do more of that
and oh well that didn't sound so good I'm never gonna do that again,
then everybody would be able to just sit at home
and get good at singing.
But part of the reason why you can't
and usually why you need instruction
is because you can't hear yourself accurately.
So, why we know this, is if you hear yourself on an
answering machine or something and
you hear it playback, you say oh my god I sound like that?!
You expect this deep rich voice but what
you hear back is some tinny whiny sound.
Now why is that true?
We have resonators when we speak and when we sing
and some of those primary resonators
are the nasopharynx and the nasal cavity.
These are two areas that are actually behind the ears
and so you can't hear those resonators very well,
but those are some of the best resonators
that we use for our sound making.
So, the sound that comes out to all of us is
different than what we hear in our heads.
So Charles, I hope that that alone is helpful for you.
That what you're hearing is not actually what we're hearing.
So if you're judging that you're actually not
able to judge it with a hundred percent accuracy.
The second thing I want to talk about
is what this judgment that we all do causes.
We live in a culture with reality TV shows that have
people going in front of millions and having their voices judged.
And if you do well you move on to the next round
and maybe you become, you know, the greatest of stars.
And if you don't do so well you might become a laughingstock.
And so we have this environment and a culture of judging singing
and that's not actually necessarily so healthy.
Because you don't want to go onstage,
you don't even want to be in the voice studio
or in your practice room, with a judgmental mindset.
Judging the voice too much causes physical tension
and a hold of the breath.
Just think about if you were gonna
listen and really scrutinize something,
think about the tension that just listening causes.
Actually let's go ahead and try it.
Just take a listen to the sounds in your own room.
Just take a pause and just really listen hard for a second.
And you notice when you go and just listen,
typically the body freezes and the breath freezes.
So just the act of listening and scrutinizing causes
us to hold on in a way that we don't want.
We know that the best performers go out there judgment-free.
They've got an ease about them,
they're not trying to make it right, they're just letting it go.
That's one thing.
Another thing is that if you aren't trusting your sound
if you're constantly judging it all the time
you're going to want to hear it better so that you can judge it.
So you may just push it out into the room for
that to happen so that you can hear it better.
You'll take it out of our friendly resonators.
and you'll push it out here.
Now the problem with that is that you're gonna hear it better,
but we're not going to hear it as well.
And it's going to sound better to you but not as good to us.
Interestingly, when you rely on the resonators that we want
mostly for singing, you won't hear it as well
and it won't sound as good to you.
But to us we'll hear it better and it will sound better.
So there's a little bit of trust and like a leap of faith
that goes on when you make sound,
to not push it out there where you can hear it
but to rely on the mechanics that you know are going to make you sound good.
Then the next thing and I've talked a little bit about this before,
is that we need the bad sounds.
We absolutely have to have the bad sounds.
If you want to make the good sounds you have to have the bad sounds.
In technique you have to have the bad sounds.
One thing that we've mentioned before is cracking.
If I want to have a great sound I've got to be okay with cracking.
If I have...
♪ Somewhere over the rainbow ♪
And then I go too far...
♪ Somewhere over the rainbow ♪
Or I don't go far enough...
♪ Somewhere over the rainbow ♪
Or I go both, and I crack...
♪ Somewhe- ♪
I'm back and forth between too much and too little,
too much and too little.
But being able to go back and forth,
being able to find something in between there, being ok with cracking...
♪ Somewhere I find that middle ♪
♪ 'ere too little, 'ere too much ♪
♪ Where ♪
Right in between.
I have to be ok with cracking if I'm going to find that in-between.
That's on a technical level.
A bad sound - cracking. Which, leads to good sound - mix.
But on a stylistic level, I just want to mention to you Charles and everybody,
let's just think about some of your favorite singers.
I know that they've got great voices,
but can you think of some nuances
to your favorite singers that are actually not the prettiest sounds?
Some of them might have a little gravel,
might have a little breathiness,
might have a little vocal fry,
they might have a vibrato that's unique or uneven,
they might push their voice a little too hard sometimes,
they might not have some strength in some areas.
But those uniquenesses are actually what is making
that singer remarkable and special.
Interestingly the bad sounds, quote-unquote, are the things
that are making that singer stand out.
So I'm not saying don't work on your voice.
I'm not saying don't aim for perfection.
But just know that a lot of times the sounds that
are not necessarily the best are a part of the singer's
whole package that makes them unique.
So if we sit and say, well I'm not gonna go out there if I make bad sounds.
I'm not gonna go out there until it's perfect.
Then truly we're missing out on a special singer.
Because there's nobody that's gonna go out there
and make perfect pristine sounds all the time.
It's just not realistic.
So we want to allow less than perfect sounds
to be a part of our style actually as we're growing.
And maybe just because it sounds great to leave it alone.
So then what do we do with judgment?
How do we get through this?
One thing is, to have people that you trust.
You said that you have a voice teacher,
family and friends who support you, that's great.
I'd encourage you, Charles and anybody,
with a great situation like that to listen to them.
If you're the only person that listens to your voice and says well this is terrible,
then probably you're wrong, because everybody else loves it.
So you need to find a way to love it too.
And that's the second thing, you need to be in a positive environment.
Whether that's in your vocal studio, or in your practice room,
the environment that you make for yourself needs to be a positive one.
If you're constantly giving yourself negative messages all the time
when you sing and saying well this sounds bad,
with voice and singing that's something that's really gonna stand in your way.
You need to fake it till you make it.
You need to tell yourself that it sounds pretty good
even before it does, or maybe it already does.
You still need to constantly reinforce a good message to your singing.
It's going to pay off big time so that you don't have those holds
and those limitations that the negative thoughts cause.
And then finally, I just want you to experiment.
Go ahead and be okay with the cracking,
be okay with the experimentation and the making of bad sounds
when you're in the voice studio, when you're practicing,
because it's the only way that you're going to have
a good solid technique and a wide spectrum,
a variety of sounds that you can make in your performances.
So Charles and all, I hope that you can work through
that judgment and get to a better place so that your singing can be even freer.
And I hope that's been helpful for you guys today.
If you have questions that you'd like us to answer on the show
you can send an email to
Questions@VoiceLessonsToTheWorld.com [♪]
So we just encourage you guys not to lose the joy, [♪]
don't lose the passion, don't let anybody tell you [♪]
that you can't sing especially if that's yourself, [♪]
because deep down you know it's not true. [♪]
Get with a great voice teacher in your area. [♪]
If you guys are in New York City you can check us out at [♪]
www.NewYorkVocalCoaching.com [♪]
And if you like these videos you can visit [♪]
www.VoiceLessonsToTheWorld.com [♪]
I'm Justin Stoney, we'll see you next time. [♪]
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