Intro music plays ♫♫
[Mac] "Oh! What's that, you were supposed to get booze!
[Frank] Ooh! This is ham!
soaked in rum
it is loaded with booze.
M: God damn it, Frank.
Eating your drinks? That is genius.
F: Ow! What the --
What the -- what is that??
M: Oh yeah"
Hey what's up guys, welcome to a very special episode of Binging with Babish
Where to celebrate 100,000 subscribers we are going to make
Both a show-accurate recreation of, and my own version of,
the insane drinks and dishes dreamed up by It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
maybe the most legendary of which is Rum Ham
Now I don't want to waste this whole ham, so I'm just going to take a large slab of it
you might call it a ham steak
put it in a bowl with a whole lot of rum
soak it overnight, just as Frank describes.
While that's soaking, though, we're going to make ourselves a delicious
brown sugar glazed ham with pineapple rum sauce.
We're going to start by scoring the meat, like so
I'm cutting a little too deep here, try just to cut into the surface of the skin, not into the meat itself
Now we're gonna make a brown sugar rub
With just a whole lot of brown sugar, some salt and pepper
that we're going to liberally rub all over the roast before placing it
in a 350 degree oven for about an hour and a half
until the center registers about 135 degrees Fahrenheit.
Now it wouldn't be rum ham without rum,
so we're gonna make some caramelized pineapple that we're then going to crank over high heat
add about half a cup of rum,
get your torch ready, and engage slow-motion.
Cool.
Stand back and have a fire extinguisher at the ready,
you don't want crispy eyebrows or... to be dead
Make sure all the alcohol's burned off,
take it off the heat, and let's get our ham out of the oven.
It's already beautiful.
Hack off a couple slices and plate it up with our beautiful pineapple sauce
You can see that I've got some Riot Juice at the ready, we'll touch on that later
Now this might be a delicious way to eat ham, but it's not gonna get you drunk
For that we're gonna need our glistening, rum-soaked slab of ham
that we're gonna take a bite of
and immediately spit out because it's really really disgusting
[Dennis] This is one of the few times where it is acceptable to be shirtless in a public forum
so I'm blastin bare chest the whole time, what do you think?
[Mac] Smart. [Frank] I think you're gonna be cold as shit
[Dennis] I'm not gonna be cold at all. Cause I'm gonna be wasted on graiin alcohol
[M] Graiiin alcohol, baby
Whenever there's a potential riot, I'm gettin blasted on grain alcohol
[D] RIOT JUICE!
[M] Like rum punch!
[F] Put some of that on my bug bites
[D] We're not gonna be wasting our fine grain alcohol on your goddamn bug bites, idiots
Riot juice is a drink to be consumed, in public, during a potentially violent sporting event
so let's get a container that we can bring to the ball park
We're gonna start with grain alcohol, and add what I can only imagine is blue Gatorade
that's blue flavored Gatorade. They couldn't come up with a name for the flavor, so they just called it blue
Now, this may get you drunk and effectively bring you back to your college days
but let's see if we can make this actually palatable
because boy, it is rough.
We're going to start with the same kind of high-proof hooch
that we're going to add to a cocktail shaker filled with ice
And some blue curaçao which has the added benefits of color, flavor, and more alcohol
And then to help make this extra-drinkable, we're going to add a little bit of pineapple juice
Close up your cocktail shaker, and shake well to combine.
Now, not only does this stuff look just like Riot Juice,
it also tastes really, really good
while getting you completely and utterly drunk
it's so good that I've actually made it for myself a few times since shooting this episode
[Mac] ...2, 1, FIGHT MILK!
The first alcoholic, dairy-based protein drink
For bodyguards...
[Charlie] ...by bodyguards!
I drink it every morning so I can fight, like a crow!
It's crow's egg!
MIILK
Made fresh!
[M] By bodyguards... and Charlie
[C] What up!
Now on to the brainchild of Mac and Charlie: Fight Milk
This, of course starts with milk
And it's surprisingly hard to get crow's eggs unless you're Charlie
so I've got some quail's eggs here, which are pretty awesome
because apparently they're a lot safer to eat raw
There's a very low chance of getting salmonella,
so I'm going to dump a whole bunch of these
in here along with what looked like vodka, from the video.
Now I'm not a bodyguard, so this is not official fight milk
but it's gonna give us a very similar flavor to what was consumed in the TV show.
Just mix that up and what we've got here is a combination of milk, eggs, and vodka,
so as you can imagine it doesn't taste... great
So let's see if we can't improve on that
I thought a great direction to go would be a makeshift eggnog martini
so we're going to add our quail's eggs, our vodka, and some milk,
along with some eggnog spice.
we've got allspice, cinnamon, nutmeg,
and a little bit of simple syrup for sweetness.
Then we're going to shake very, very vigorously
because you want to emulsify those eggs
and make a nice, creamy drink like this
I've already had a lot to drink so far today
with the Riot Juice, so I'm just going to have a sip of this just to try it.
Maybe just one more sip, it's pretty good, so...
ah, that's very good, maybe one more sip...
[Frank] Okay, the butter goes on, then the peanut butter.
[Charlie] Hmm? What're you doing?
[F] Peanut butter goes in the middle?
[C] No! Do not put peanut butter on that!
A Grilled Charlie has peanut butter last
[F] Okay, either inside or outside?
[C] Peanut butter outside! Chocolate inside!
Butter inside, cheese outside!
*knock*
[F] Go away!
Whatever you do, don't make a Grilled Charlie
unless you're in the mood to scrape a whole bunch of burnt cheese off the bottom of your pan.
We're going to start by buttering the wrong side of our bread
and placing it cheese-side down in a hot skillet.
We're then going to top that with some chocolate syrup
Another piece of buttered bread - again, wrong side down.
We're gonna try and flip that but, of course, it's gonna be burnt to the bottom,
get some nice, melted, crunchy cheese there, and then we're gonna top the other side with peanut butter
before scooping and serving. Now, this was actually not as bad as I thought it was gonna be.
The cheese was kinda lost in the peanut butter and the chocolate
but it was good enought that I had more than one bite, I'm ashamed to say, here you go.
But as it is with most of the foods in "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia," I feel we can do better.
So we are gonna start with some brioche, then we're gonna put some melted butter,
top it with some good, eating, chocolate; and a nice slab of brie
that we're then going to top with another slice of brioche smeared with peanut butter.
We're gonna toast that up just like we would any other grilled cheese sandwich before slicing and serving.
Of all of the "It's always sunny" iterations on this episode I almost wanna recommend this one the most
but it doesn't hold a candle to Milk Steak
[Dennis] Let's talk about your likes and dislikes... How about your favorite food?
What that would that be?
[Charlie] Um, Milk Steak.
[D] What?
[C] Milk Steak.
[D] I'm not putting Milk Steak! I'm gonna put steak! [Mac] Just put steak and then we'll...
[C] Don't put steak! Put Milk Steak! She'll know what it is.
[D] No, she won't know what it is, Charlie. Nobody knows what that is.
[Babish] I think you guys know how Milk Steak is prepared.
We're gonna bring about two cups of milk to a boil before
dropping a once beautiful rib-eye into the boiling milk until palid and mishapen.
Remove from the milk once it looks like it's maybe... done, I don't know.
And before digging in, we need to add Charlie's preferred accoutrement which is a few handfuls of jelly beans.
I know this looks absolutely scroumptious, but as soon as I managed to scoop a bite into my mouth, well...
Sorry you have to see this. It was not only the flavor but the texture that was the stuff of nightmares
so I know that we can improve on this one.
We are gonna start with half a pound of bacon that we're gonna render on about a quarter cup of water
until we get all the fat out and it's crispy brown.
We're then gonna brown some boneless shortrib in the bacon fat; now I know this isn't quite steak
but it's beef and it's fatty, it's delicious and it's actually gonna work very well braised in milk.
So after we get a nice brown crust on those we're gonna take them out, add our bacon back to the pot.
Crank up the heat and deglaze with - you guessed it - milk.
Scrape up all of that delicious fond off the bottom of the pot and then add some sage, rosemary and a few carrots for sweetness.
Along with a couple cloves of garlic and our browned pieces of boneless shortrib.
Make sure they are propped on top of the vegetables so they are sticking out of the liquid a little bit.
This way they can continue to brown as they braise in the oven for about 2 hours - 300 degree oven.
Once they are butterknife tender we are gonna take them out of the braising liquid and cool them
so we can slice them into pleasing little cubes.
In the meantime, we're gonna make a bacon gravy.
This is just like a sausage gravy but with, instead of sausage, bacon.
How did you know that?
So just like we did earlier we are gonna render and brown about a quarter pound of bacon,
before adding a few tablespoons of flour, effectively creating a roux.
And then adding milk to create gravy.
That we are then going to mix up and make sure we get the consistency right.
Taste for seasoning, add salt and pepper as necessary and get ready for plating.
Now in lieu of jelly beans, we have a rosemary and pea shoot gel - I'll make all of these recipes available when I have the gumption to type them up.
I'm gonna go for a chef's table kinda vibe
so I'm gonna line these up with some deep-fried parmesan-polenta cubes
and then top each of our pieces of shortrib with some of our bacon gravy.
Garnish with some mustard microgreens, this is gonna give a nice and peppery bite.
Swirl with a bit more of our rosemary/pea shoot gel.
Add some edible flowers for color.
Wipe up the swirl of rosemary/pea shoot gel when we realize it might've been a poor design choice.
Opt for some dots instead and let's dig in.
Now while this might have strayed ever so slightly from what Charlie had in mind
when he ordered Milk Steak in that restaurant, this turned out really, really good
and was one of the few plates in the history of this show that I ended up leaving totally clean.
But then again, I was blasted on grain alcohol.
*coughs with disgust*
Oh man!
*coughs with disgust*