[Music]
it's guitar hero stan and kyle are
really good at it
well you kids want to see something
really cool check this out
once i rose above the noise and
confusion
just to get a glimpse beyond this
illusion
i was soaring ever higher
[Music]
are you ready to run carry on my
don't you cry no more
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
game over you suck
is that a computer game no arthard it's
an mmorpg
these are real people i'm playing with
see i'm a hunter level two
i can chat with all these other people i
can even wave to this guy see
hello in the outside world i'm a simple
geologist
but in here i am falcorn
defender of the alliance i've braved the
fargo deep mine defeated the bloodfish
at jared's landing
hmm give me the sword you
i have a warcraft character i'm a noob
but i can log on and get the sword to
stand online
we can't trust the sword of a thousand
truths to a noob
sounds to me like we don't have a choice
give me the sword
[Music]
oh i got it
dad no
dad dad stan
i've never been able to say this before
but
i love you son i know you do dad
ah
your blood work came back great and all
your vitals appear normal all right
yep you check out fine that's great so
can i get a referral from you
for what medicinal marijuana
there's a shop that opened in the old
kfc and they said i needed a doctor's
referral to buy weed
mr marsh you don't qualify for medicinal
marijuana
but you said i'm totally healthy
medicinal marijuana is for people who
aren't healthy
aids patients cancer patients the thc
helps them eat and
take the pain you are in fine shape
well that sucks
dad mom says to stop trying to give
yourself cancer
just gonna get a little bit of cancer
stan tell mom it's okay
did you have fun at eric's house today
stanley well i guess
what did you do well carmen wants to
start a boy band so we're gonna rehearse
and then try to perform at the south
park mall
oh well that sounds nice no it does not
sound nice stanley you are gonna have no
part in that boy band well but dad all
my friends are doing it if all your
friends jumped off a cliff would you do
that too
carmen says we can make 10 million
dollars you are not going to be in a boy
band stanley and that is final
it's not fair dad why can't i be in a
boy band because i said so
dad cartman said we're gonna perform at
the mall at three o'clock my friends are
gonna be pissed off at me let him be
pissed off then i don't understand just
let me go do this one thing and i won't
oh
oh it's over it's over
oh god wow
hey hey sharon sharon you got to come
see this
sharon what is it randy do you have any
oh
randy will you look at that is that the
biggest crap you've ever seen or what
hey stan stan look at this randy
look what your old man made no way huh
never seen one that big have you
guinness world records america uh yes
hello my name is randy marsh
and i believe i took the world's biggest
crap
hey president take a look at this it is
a crap sent to us from the united states
very nice
why not bring broadway to south park huh
think about it brah how hard can writing
a musical be
we need some musicians some actors we
can put on our own shows right here in
town
mr randy marsh
sorry folks we're in a hole just freeze
right there uh this better be important
it is i represent some of the biggest
names in all of broadway
they wish to speak with you really oh my
god
take a break guys this could be it hey
hon hi babe
sorry i was kind of hanging out with the
guys randy it's fine
you do plenty with me did you have a
good time yeah yeah and we really made
some progress with the show
andrew lloyd webber and those guys are
gonna help us with it
it's spider-man
[Music]
you are all looking at the new owner of
blockbuster video
you got your sci-fi comedies buddy
flicks chick flicks all
on blu-ray or dvd
hey you kids looking to rent some dvds
what's he talking about renting a diva d
oh i get it blockbuster's sold it's
creepy
ha ha nobody rents movies anymore people
just don't know we're open yet
little [ __ ] pricks i'm coming
i'm coming son
come on ellen this picture throws like a
girl what'd you say
you heard me [ __ ] you want me to kick
your ass right here
randy sit down you want a piece of me
cause i'm pretty sick of your goddamn
mouth
what do you want to do huh what do you
want to do randy don't you better shut
up [ __ ] standing right here how do
you want to handle it i told you to shut
up
for what arrested me for what i'm not
allowed to stand up for myself
i thought this was america fort collins
can't play
why don't you shut your mouth before i
kick your ass
come on let's go i'm right here randy
sit down before you get hurt
[ __ ] let's move out to the
country
go back to simple living when things
mattered like hard work integrity
how will we make a living by growing
things and
selling what we make with our hands we
can do this sharon
it's time this old world
is getting to me there's just no
trust no integrity
so i loaded up the kids took my wife by
the
arm and i moved on
out to a colorado farm
[Music]
now it's early to bed early it arrives
the crops are plowed and there's no
surprise
city folks are fighting and i don't give
a darn
cause i make my living on a colorado
farm
[Music]
and i'm gonna stay on a colorado farm
[ __ ]
isn't this great stan living off the
land no it sucks i hate this
i want to go back home well you see that
we're talking now
when was the last time we really talked
like this
i hate you so much i think we're having
a breakthrough moment
dad what are you doing huh you're just
in time sit down sit down i've made you
all breakfast again
oh crap now what i have for you is a
nice goat cheese and heirloom tomato
frittata and we're gonna top that with a
little
cream freeze i quit now what i have for
your starters today is a potato
encrusted scallop with lobster foam
and we're gonna top that with some nice
cream freeze lobster foam
it says very clearly on the lunch
schedule that today is pizza day
yes and so this is my take on a pizza
it's an asian slaw on flatbread
deconstructed and topped with a nice
parmesan aioli
dad no i'm gonna tell mom go back to
your other job right now
who says that school cafeteria food
can't be healthy delicious
and gourmet today we're going to be
making the students my tasty baked ziti
with basil and fresh mozzarella
it's all right here right now on
cafeteria fridge
can we have some food please
you