- Hey everybody, happy Thursday
and if you hear some rummaging,
they are pulling out all the bushes and trees
around my apartment and I have been waiting for hours
but they won't shut up.
So I apologize if you hear like (mimics power tools)
'cause they're doin' the work.
But anyway, so today's video is kind of a follow up
from a video I released on January 17.
I'm looking at my laptop and it's called
Are People with Borderline Personality Disorder Bad?
The reason that I'm doing this follow up is because
there was a ton of chatter in the comments about,
well not really about,
from people who had been emotionally hurt,
physically hurt, or just hurt and upset in general
by those with borderline personality disorder.
And many of them felt upset because
they felt that when I was talking about in the video
by saying that people with borderline personality disorder
aren't bad, I was
in some way negating their feelings
or telling them that they have no right to be upset.
And they were arguing that people with borderline are bad
and I just really wanted to talk about it
with all of you wonderful people,
clear the air so that we're all on the same page.
You with me.
Okay, so I'm gonna start if off, people with BPD,
are not bad, period.
End of discussion.
That's it.
Are there people in this world who are bad?
Yes and that's a distinction I want to make.
Having borderline personality disorder
does not equate to us being a bad person.
Having depression doesn't mean that.
Anxiety does not mean.
ADHD doesn't mean that.
Eating disorder, I can go on and on and on for days.
Because a diagnosis does not equal
us being a bad person or a good a person
or a thoughtful person.
Like the actions that we take
are the things that we have to take responsibility for.
We can't blame it on a diagnosis.
That's part of the whole reason I do my channel
is so that we can help ourselves
realize what's going on, understand what we're going through
and work to be better humans in general.
Can someone with BPD have hurt you?
Of course!
Can you be upset and really hate their guts?
Yeah.
Should you hold onto that
and shout at people in the comments?
Probably not, because there in lies what our own work is.
I know if I was really hurt by someone
and I harbored that, that would just
fester in my body and I'd be so angry.
And so if you find yourself just still full of anger
from being hurt by someone,
I would encourage you to reach out for help
and start talking about it in a healthy, happy way
with a therapist so that you can get some insights,
you can gain a little bit of, you know,
tools and tricks and tips,
wow that was a mouthful,
So that you can better help yourself
when you're really feeling icky, bad, down,
all of the above, okay?
I just want us all to understand
that a diagnosis doesn't make us a bad person,
the actions we take do.
And people with BPD can lash out,
they can be hurtful.
That's why there's such a stigma out there
and why a lot of people have told me
that therapist don't take them,
because they find out they have BPD
and they're like no, no, no.
And I just wanted to set the record straight
that that doesn't...
BPD doesn't mean you're a bad person.
It doesn't even mean you're a difficult patient.
That would be like lumping everybody into a big tent
and being like you're all the same.
We know everyone experience a diagnoses differently.
I have a video about quite borderline,
where people actually take the anger, frustration,
the reaction, and all of that stuff out on themselves.
So there are very different types of BPD
and to lump all of them and say
everybody with borderline is bad,
is just perpetuating a terrible, terrible stigma
and I can't be a part of it.
And so if I find you leaving comments like,
I'm not going to approve them.
I don't want you guys fighting in the comments either.
That's something that is
just difficult for me and I don't really,
that's not what this channel about.
The channel is about us communicating,
having a healthy, open conversation about mental health.
Is it fair for you to say
that you've been hurt by someone with borderline?
Yes.
Is it fair for you to say everybody with borderline is bad?
No!
And I think that's the distinction
and that's just what I want you all to hear.
And I am so sorry.
I take full responsibility if you felt
that the other video negated
or in some way made it feel like
I wouldn't take your feeling seriously
or wasn't taking into consideration
people who've been hurt by those with borderline.
In all honesty, that's for another video
and I'm happy to do it.
Let me know in the comments if you want a video about that,
'cause I'm more than happy to talk about
what it's like to live with a borderline
who's not taking responsibility for their actions,
because I think that's important too.
But what I want to get across
and what I wanted to get across in that video
is that a diagnosis doesn't make us a bad person,
the actions that we take do.
And we all have to take responsibility for our actions,
because that's what affects others
and in the end, ends up ruining our relationships.
So I hope that that's clear
and you understand that I'm not upset with either side,
I just want you all to understand
where I was coming from
and that I in no way meant to hurt
anybody's feeling, make you feel like I wasn't hearing you
or anything.
I would just ask that you don't fight with each other
in the comments because then I'm like a referee.
Nope that's too far.
No, I hear you, but I can't approve it
and then I kinda feel like an asshole in the end anyway.
Okay, I love you all.
I hope that you like this video.
I hope you understand where I'm coming from
and if you want more about that,
just let me know what topics
you'd like me to talk about in the comments.
I love you all, bye!