Sometimes I feel like success comes when you really dig deep inside yourself and just accept
yourself for who you are. And you decide that that's the person you're going to be. And you lean
into it that that often is where success comes from because people sort of see that there's an
inner truth being expressed or a certain kind of comfort when you've accepted yourself.
Just being true to who you are I think it's the key to success.
Have you ever felt like learning English was just too hard? Like you would never
be successful? Well Luke, from Luke’s English Podcast, joins me in the studio today to share
some tips that can help you to push through the most difficult times of learning English
and finally gain fluent, confident English communication. Luke, welcome to the show!
Thank you very much for the invitation, it's always nice to be on your show.
So Abhishek says that in 2 months following the tips from our videos,
they have gotten the confidence that they needed to finally start speaking!
Well if you hit the subscribe button and the bell down below then we promise to help you
understand fast speech, be understood by anyone, and connect with the world just like Abhishek has!
I hear a lot of English lerners saying as well like you know,
"I can't, I'm an adult, I'm too old, I can't learn it." Whatever...
But it's really one of the big excuses for kids, I mean they've done studies now that
adults are better language learners because of the way that we can logically think about
things and piece things together. Kids make like a lot of mistakes and everything. It takes them
a lot longer but they have like so much time on their hands as well that, you know, they're
just all day like listening to their parents and playing around with it and stuff and so...
It's just something that 12 hours a day they're working on and that most adults
- can't actually spend that time doing it. - Plus kids have got no sort of limiting mental
factors like adults will you know, feel bad if they haven't made progress in a certain amount
of time. They feel self-conscious, they're proud, all those sorts of things. Kids don't seem to be
weighed down by all that stuff and so their language learning
journey is probably a lot more smooth and is...
There are fewer obstacles, whereas adults will put all sorts of obstacles in their way
though, "Oh, I'm not good enough for this, I've got an accent blah blah." So yeah, it does take
time you've got to, you know, it takes time like in the same way that kids do it. But also
you can speed that up by referring to language learning materials, you know, grammar books,
and practice activities, and teachers and stuff. As long as you don't get stuck in your head and
start, you start getting stuck focusing on grammar and self-editing all the time, then
it ruins your fluency. Kids don't get stuck analyzing grammar as they learn,
you know. We can do it faster than kids because kids take a long time. We can
do it faster than kids. We just have to try to prevent ourselves getting discouraged or getting
or having a confidence bruised or whatever, so it's like a battle
to maintain that motivation and confidence while also you know, doing the right kinds of practice.
A few years ago I read a book by Ryan Holiday called The Obstacle is the Way. This book talks
all about how the most successful people are able to turn the barriers and obstacles that
inevitably show up in life into opportunities. For example, did you know that Steve Jobs was
actually fired from Apple in its early days? It’s crazy! It was a company that he created.
Yet he turned this into an opportunity to get the experience that he needed
to actually be a great leader and to learn how to build products that could change people’s lives.
He later rejoined Apple as CEO and made it one of the most valuable companies in the world.
I remember there was this woman, I can't remember her name but a surfer that was attacked by shark
and like lost a leg and everything. It's like you think this person's never going to surf again.
And she was actually able to, you know, turn that into her own sort of advantage and became I think,
having that weakness and everything made her a much better surfer because she had to kind
of get over it, you know, and and learned to make it into something that was in fact advantageous.
I watched the documentary about climbing and it was these two guys who were climbing up El Capitan
in Yosemite National Park. And this, and you know trying to do it in record-breaking time
or whatever, and this one guy he had an accident and he lost his uh index finger
on his right hand. And for a rock climber, I mean you would normally say that is it,
that's game over, you can't climb if you've lost your index finger, it's absolutely crucial. But he
actually decided that he would sort of like train his middle finger to do the same job and, you
know, he spent many months training his finger and working on it, working on it, working on it until
he got it strong enough to be able to continue climbing and as you said that became like his kind
of unique thing that it turned into a strength. That he worked on it so much and it meant that
he was a better climber than he was before somehow because of this uniquely shaped hand that he was
able to form different types of grips with his middle finger, and so on. So, yeah, I think
- it's another example of what you were saying. - It's really like that strength comes out of
adversity so like when it's easy really, success never comes out of things being easy
it's always when things are really difficult and you find a way despite things being difficult,
right? Yeah, necessity or something it's the mother of invention. Yeah it's true
when you've really fought, it's a bit like when you were a student at university,
when I was anyway, that I would get say six weeks to write an essay and I wouldn't do it at all,
I just wouldn't be able to. And then the last two days I'd suddenly go into overdrive and
stay up all night and write the thing so, when your back is against the wall sort of thing,
you know, it just shows what you can do or if you're mountain climbing and you
feel completely exhausted but you put you keep pushing because you've got no choice,
and your body responds. That if you ask your body to do something that, you know,
that it has a tremendous amount of potential that you can get from it, if you just ask it, you know,
when you're really forced to, that's when you see what you're capable of.
There was like an example we had Leo, I don't know if you've heard of the Speak Your English Podcast,
that adversity he worked it, kind of challenged him to work much harder and to
reach that goal despite what other people might believe.
I would say that in the beginning there was a lot of prejudice, I think. I remember applying for
positions where I would go for an interview and people would really like my resume but the
moment they saw me or the moment they talked to me they're like, "Oh, so you're not from Canada?
You weren't born here?" I said, "No, I wasn't born here." But I would show them, I would try
to show them the other skills that would bring to the table and of course in the beginning
I had to prove myself. But to be honest with you Ethan and everyone watching this, I think the
biggest impediment to becoming the kind of person that I wanted to become or to to reach higher
levels in my professional life, I think it was within me. I think to a certain extent
I am my worst critic. And I think for a very long period of time I had a really hard time
accepting the fact that I was different. But I couldn't see that difference as being
a differential, I couldn't see that as, "Hey, you know what? I'm different, that's actually better."
Because I'm different I can use that as leverage to get to where I want to be.
So, what problems and barriers are getting in the way of your success learning English?
I’d invite you to reflect on how you could turn them into opportunities
or advantages. You can even have a conversation with a friend about this,
or comment about it down below and discuss it with other RealLifers.
You know the way that Batman um is scared of bats but then he uses his
fear and turns it into his own superpower? Like his weakness becomes his strength,
that he becomes fear itself, you know ,and then he starts speaking like this which is
kind of strange and scary. So like Batman I decided that rambling would be my
super hero power and I thought actually this is kind of the thing that I do. So I kind of
decided that yeah okay, I'm gonna be the rambling guy, but then, but also I am working on it too,
you know, accept yourself for who you are. But, you know, it doesn't mean you can't
still continue to work on yourself, but you know it's about balance, finding the right balance
between accepting yourself for who you are and trying to just be that and still trying to make
little improvements and adjustments too. So I think there's just so much energy required to
when you're trying to be something that you're not, you know, and and really once you accept
who you really are it's just like all this, you're happier right? Because in general you're
not trying to waste all this energy trying to be this person that you're not, you're trying to hide
something, or trying to be like other people. So when you do kind of own up to who you are,
you accept that, I think not only will you be more successful but you'll be happier. You won't be
so hating of yourself and these things that maybe are imperfect. Well, If you ever feel
lost when natives speak too fast, you are not alone. When I first started learning Catalan,
there was a series that I really wanted to watch, but I just could not understand it on my own.
A friend of mine agreed to watch it with me and explain the parts that left me confused. Now, you
may not have a friend to help you do this, so why not let us be that friend? With our RealLife App,
you will get an interactive transcript for full interviews with experts and teachers like Luke.
Plus, we explain all of the difficult vocabulary so that you can confidently understand
the real English speech. You can practice your speaking, too! Just press a button and instantly
be connected to a learner like you in another part of the world for a fun and dynamic conversation
in English! And, it’s all free! I bet this sounds like a dream, right? Well now with the RealLife
English app, it’s a dream come true. So download it now by searching for RealLife English in the
Apple App or Google Play Store. Or just click here or in the description below.
You also have to switch off your editor which is a thing that people say that means that if you're trying
to come up with funny ideas, you've got to kind of cancel out that voice that tells you to stop.
There's a voice that says no you can't say that, no that's unacceptable, no you'll look like a fool,
you're going to make a fool of yourself. You just switch that part off and that liberates you to
just kind of come up with anything and similarly if you're practicing your English I think you
should switch your editor off a bit as well, you know, sometimes on if you're trying to analyze
you know, the grammar and correct what you're saying but if you're trying to work on fluency
then switch off your editor and just sort of let it all flow, go with the flow. And then
the other thing is about nerves and just if you do if you have nerves in a public speaking situation
and just the ways that you prepare for it, just the way you have to breathe, you have to prepare for
the the Stand Up, you know, I've got to get my material ready and get it all prepared and
practiced, similarly you've got to prepare for a presentation or job interview, but yeah breathe, try
to enjoy it, even if that sounds crazy just try and enjoy it. And you know, body posture is important
having holding yourself open, trying not to let yourself go into a defensive body posture which
can encourage those nervous feelings control your breathing, open out your body and try to enjoy it
and I apply those things to Stand Up and I think you could probably apply the same things
to speaking English either in a high pressure situation or just generally
practicing and communicating.
You know, Anna from English Fluency Journey is a learner who has faced
a lot of adversity herself on her journey to gain native like English. Let's watch a clip of
my interview with her. - People who criticize usually don't do anything. They don't know anything about
your work, about your experience, about what you've been through, they are just talking.
That's their job. To just speak like around you, so just don't mind that. If this is someone
who you look up to and whose advice you would love to get, then of course you better
listen to that person. But if this is someone who you don't even know, who doesn't know you, you know,
it's just pointless. It's just pointless to waste your time on those people's opinion because
because you're just gonna waste your time. So you better do what you feel is best for you, for your
family, and if you enjoy learning English, and if you enjoy working on your pronunciation, and
speaking with an American or British or whatever accent just go for it just do it. You do you.