(rhythmic marimba chimes)
- Right Tracey.
Time to make the best ever seating plan
for your dinner party tonight
to show everyone what a great life you have
here in the big city.
And you're definitely not stressed about
that big report you have on Henry VIII.
Who to sit where?
Charlie and Stevie can't sit together.
They had an awkward snog last week.
And Christina just talks about her half marathon
or that thing she cares about,
so she can't sit next to anyone.
Uh, politics is hard.
But wait, if it's hard for my friendship group,
it must have been even harder for Henry VIII,
who had a whole country to manage.
Let's investigate!
(upbeat music)
(snare drum roll)
(trumpet flare)
Welcome to Tudor News Night from Hampton Court Palace
with me, Tracey Tooley.
I wanted to call this episode "Tudesnight"
to combine the concepts of Tudor and News Night
but my producer said no one would get it.
But I've said it now and there's no going back from that.
Am I right, Gary the Camera Man?
- [Cameraman] My name's Dave.
- I couldn't possibly comment.
First rule of history reporting is to talk
to people who were there at the time.
(guitar strumming)
Katherine of Aragon, Henry the Eighth's first wife.
- 'Sup?
- Katherine, I can tell straight away,
you are a hundred percent very cool.
- When you are married to a guy like Henry Hen-Hen
you gotta be tough.
- Cute nickname.
Tough yes, and not just in marriage.
You ran the whole country as Regent in 1513,
while Henry was away at war.
- Yep, my full title was Regent, Governor of the Realm
and Captain General, boom.
- And you won the Battle of Flodden,
a major victory for England
against an invading Scottish army.
- Yeah, the Scottish king, James IV, was killed
and I send a piece of his blood stained cloak to Hen-Hen.
- Bad-ass and you're a scholar,
fluent in multiple languages.
Si, pero no hables demasiado de ello!
- Okay, major history crush alert.
Sounds like you can do anything.
- Everything but one.
I couldn't give Henry a son to king after him.
- Why'd it have to be a son?
- I know, right?
He said a queen would cause chaos
and plus this whole thing
where he thought our marriage was cursed from God
because I was originally married to his brother Arthur,
just before he died.
- Weird.
- Henry is weird.
But also great.
We had so many interesting conversations
about politics and books.
Until he started a-lookin' elsewhere.
- At Anne Boleyn.
- Oh way to bring her up.
- Sorry.
- No it's okay.
It's Henry's problem, really.
He fell in love with her
and did everything he could to get rid of me.
He took me to court.
He broke up our family.
He banished me to this rubbish castle in Cambridgeshire.
- Ouch.
- And the stupid part is, I still love Henry above all else.
Even after all he did to me.
I guess my heart is tougher than I am.
- Deep, thanks for talking to us.
- De nada chica.
- Be still my beating history crush.
Ara-going, Ara-going, Ara-gone.
Time to throw questions at our next interviewee.
Like throwing netballs into the hoop of truth.
Cardinal Wolsey, you were very powerful,
could you crush people at kick of the finger?
- I didn't crush anyone unless absolutely necessary.
(sniffs loudly)
- Creepy, what's your top tip
for people going into politics?
- Have a great big palace to intimidate your rivals
and impress the King.
- Did you follow that rule?
- Follow it?
You're standing in it.
Hampton Court Palace used to be mine, all mine.
- No way, you were a big cheese.
- I was the cheddar, the brie and the babybel, baby.
Look at my elephant tapestry.
- Creepy again but fine.
How'd ya get a place like this?
- Ah the glory days
When Henry came to the throne, he was a young man,
only just turning 18, he needed an experienced advisor.
- So you took all the power.
Look at this poem from Henry's tutor,
John Skelton in 1522.
"The King's court should have the excellence;
"But Hampton Court hath the pre-eminence."
- Sick rhyme.
But sadly my power didn't last.
- Yes, Henry wanted to divorce Katherine of Aragon,
didn't he, the mad man?
- Yes and I had to make it happen.
I tried everything with the Pope, to get his permission.
But I failed and Henry banished me to York.
- I'm starting to see a pattern
of Henry banishing people here.
- At least I still my sweet pomanders.
You smell so sweet and you make the air smell so sweet.
Don't you?
Yes, you do.
Yum, yum.
(kisses loudly)
(sniffs loudly)
oh yeah.
(sniffs loudly)
(fatalistic somber music)
- [Tracey] So I've talked with
two high-flying political animals
who both met their downfall after Henry's first divorce.
But who feathered the nest after them?
Mainly, Thomas Cromwell, the son of a blacksmith
who rose up the ranks.
- Welcome to the Great Hall.
Careful what you say in here.
Some people believe those strange eavesdroppers
were carved into the ceiling to spy on you.
(ghostly garbled whispering)
- Well, aren't you a paranoid android?
Thomas Cromwell, you had a lot of power
after Cardinal Wolsey got into trouble
over Henry's first divorce.
But where did it go wrong for you?
- Uh well, Henry was looking for a wife.
- Another one?
- Another, nother, nother wi...
This is to be wife number four.
- Cripes.
- So I suggested Anne of Cleves, a fine match
from a good German family.
I arranged everything and then the King didn't like her.
- Ouch.
- Indeed, Henry didn't like her
which means Henry didn't like me.
I was locked up for treason in 1540 and then beheaded.
- Jeez Louise, does anyone survive Henry's court?
- I dunno, I mean, I died before him obviously.
- On reflection, that was insensitive, soz Croms.
(slow footsteps)
What a wild Tudesnight!
Doing politics under Henry VIII
was as backstabbing and gossipy as it is today.
With the added twist that he could
have your head chopped off.
But on the other hand, Henry could be very trusting.
And he gave a lot of power to his advisors and his wives.
So, what do you make of all this?
Was Henry a good ruler?
Would you have wanted the job of advising the King?
With lots of power but serious risks if you displeased him?
I'm Tracey Tooley.
Towering titan of Tudor times.
Tood-a-loo.
- [Katherine] Hey Trace, you wanna hang out or whatever?
- Oh my goodness, yes please.
I've got this dinner party tonight,
if you fancy coming to that.
- Sounds rad.
- I wanted to say,
this whole thing about having a son with Henry,
it's actually not your fault.
There are these things called Y chromosomes and...
(guitar strumming)
(rhythmic rock music)