- I didn't know how to do that, like how to actually be...
the Pastor, or the Pastor's wife, back then,
I didn't know how to do that
and so I felt like I had to be other people's versions
of what that looked like. - Fit in a mold.
- To fit some mold, right, and so I--
- And that was very much the culture at the time too.
- Yeah, it was a very not (interrupts self)
And so I'm, here I am, this spunky young thing, right?
With all the edges that I have now, but I went;
"Okay, I have to be a certain way!"
And so all I saw was women in polyester (group laughs)
suits with big gold buttons, and like the gold earrings.
- Saint John! - Uh huh, see,
and the hair that didn't move. - (everyone talks)
- And pantyhose! - [Dianna] Oh my goodness.
- And so I thought, well okay, that's how you do church,
so that's the mold, and I just, it wasn't me, it never
like it never settled, I couldn't even find my voice
cause I was wearing wrong flipping clothes.
- Cause you're wearing pantyhose!
- (group laughs) - You were wearing pantyhose,
nobody can find their voice in pantyhose.
- (group laughs) - At least you were
past the point of having to play the piano.
- Organ! - No, but to your point,
which is terrible, I can't sing two notes in the same key,
or play two notes in them, but there was that pressure
to be that person, right, cause that's the old mindset
and I remember I had that moment
in my closet one Sunday morning,
and I'm just so frustrated as I'm tearing
and ripping another pair of pantyhose,
and I felt the spirit of God saying to me;
"What are you doing?" - (group agrees)
- I was like: "I'm getting dressed for church, thank you!"
He says: "I actually didn't call you to be this girl."
Said: "As soon as you will be who you are,
and speak the way I want you to speak,
you watch what will happen." - (group agrees)
- And so our Church, and actually Philip was kind of having
the same revelation at that point too, which is awesome,
so that's actually when our church began to really grow,
because I started feeling comfortable.
- [Lisa] In your own skin. - In my own skin!
Using my voice, speaking the way I wanna speak,
wearing what I wanna wear, and I just think
that's so freeing, when you actually realize
that you can be who God called you to be.
You know in 1st Corinthians 12 it talks about
the body and all the parts of the body and each have value,
and we get in trouble when I say,
"I don't need the part that you are"
or I look at your part and go, "I should be like you."
- (group agrees) - Which is ridiculous!
- And we'll never find our voice
if we don't actually feel comfortable being who...
- I'm thinking, as you're talking,
I'm thinking of David not wearing Saul's armor.
- (group agrees) - You know, and he was like...
- He didn't wear Saul's pantyhose!
- (group laughs) - Too big!
- I do think that there was that movement
that Ministers all look like, female Ministers look like
(emphasizes) this, we have pictures of me looking like that.
- You and I look the same! - Back then we look the same.
- Both confused! - And I look way older
and confused, way older and confused, cause it was awkward!
And the truth is we've been so busy
trying to prepare messages, that we forget we are messages.
That we're living epistles and so when people see us
and we can't be comfortable with ourselves
they can't hear what we're saying,
and we can't actually be authentically who we are.
I think that that's really important, that we're all...
So I did the same thing, I went through my closet,
cause I would say to John, he'd be like: "I like that!"
I'd be like: "Would so-and-so wear this?
They would never wear this, I can't wear this!"
John would be like: "I'm not married to so-and-so!"
And so I remember I went through a magazine,
and I looked at images, and I said: "I like this woman,
she'd be my friend, and I'd be her friend!
I'm gonna dress who I actually really am!"
And I just went through my closet
and got rid of all of my preacher clothes.
- Your preacher clothes! - I did, I did!
Same thing, probably around the same time,
cause I remember reading your book,
and in the middle of the night I thought:
"I'm gonna call her, we would be friends!"
- (group laughs) - He said, she says, or...
- No, it's Dumb Things We Do,
Dumb Things He Does, Dumb Things She Does.
- Yeah, but then there was, and there was another book,
cause we were at the same publisher,
and I was like: "Why do I not know her?
Oh my gosh, we're the same person!"
And it was so freeing for me! (gentle music plays)
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