There's a poll that confirms that Kate is at least twice as popular as Meghan in the
US.
And maybe it has to do with the one reason you're about to find out.
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Even if one has to take any kind of poll with a grain of salt, it is not difficult to pinpoint
why Kate leads in popularity.
And the first reason is one very easy to grasp once you answer a very simple question I'm
about to ask you.
How many times have you heard Catherine talking on a video?
I mean, any video, or clip that you've seen of her, how many times have you seen her talking?
It's a strange question, right?
but it's important to establish how perception, or the perception of a person, works.
It's even more relevant if you try to remember the most striking or memorable moment of Kate
that you could remember.
Did she need to talk, or was she talking, or giving a public speech at that moment you
remember?
Just from the past year we still have fresh the Golden Dress from the James Bond Premiere
and her appearance at the earthshot prize.
But the fact is that her appearances have been mostly an exercise in body language.
It's not that she doesn't give speeches, it's that in most of her appearances, we cannot
hear her talk.
Now, let's make the same question about Meghan.
It's much easier to remember all the times we have heard her talking.
And to be fair, let's count only those times after she started her relationship with Harry.
It's highly likely that the clips or videos from Meghan that were more impactful for you,
include some sort of speaking, or talking, because there are so many of them!
And of course, it doesn't help that many times, what she said has worked in the exact opposite
of what she intended.
Just like when she was visiting South Africa, saying that no one had asked if she was OK.
Now, you might be wondering what does NOT talking have to do with popularity?
well, there is one huge fact about our perception, that is mystery.
Mystery is something that every single person should be able to handle in a healthy way.
You should never reveal everything about you on one sitting, because you'll instantly become
boring.
I know I'm oversimplifying this concept, but this applies to literally everything.
There is no way a personality can be interesting, there is no way YOU can be interesting, if
you don't nurture a bit of mystery around yourself.
I understand that this can sound like a weird suggestion, but I'm not saying that you should
lie or fool people into thinking you're something you're not.
That is not mystery.
Mystery is showing people just enough of you, so they keep guessing the rest, and surprise
them from time to time with a new angle that they just weren't aware of.
And that fits exactly with Kate's piano playing.
It took everyone by surprise and it was totally unexpected.
But the only reason it had that impact, is because it was surrounded by an aura of mystery.
This is one of the most important skills that you can acquire, for many reasons.
And the most important one is that you want people to perceive you as interesting.
And many people have the misconception that being interesting is having a lot of knowledge,
or having traveled a lot, or playing more that one musical instrument, or having many
hidden skills.
I want to be very clear about this, because most people who have a lot of knowledge end
up bragging about what they know, or where they have traveled, or the cultures they have
known.
And that doesn't make people interesting.
In fact, that makes people really boring.
Now, it certainly helps if you have diverse interests, and make time to explore those
interests.
Having general knowledge and nurturing your curiosity is one of the best investments you
can do for yourself.
But popularity, or being interesting, or having a magnetic or even charismatic personality
starts with mystery.
That is why the greatest conversationalists are the ones that TALK LESS.
Because, instead of talking about themselves, they are masters at making the conversation
be about you.
So, you have a great time talking about yourself... because everyone loves talking about themselves!
and then, maybe you realize you don't know that much about this person, precisely because
the conversation was about you.
So, they have still this aura of mistery, just for being good at conversations.
And that's why I asked you about how did you remember both Catherine and Meghan in terms
of talking.
But there's another angle: there are people that are really good at making us think and
reflect, and they are talking all the time.
Jordan Peterson is literally talking all the time.
But a lot of what he says is valuable, because the man knows what he's talking about.
But notice that the big difference here is that he doesn't talk about himself, or about
his personal issues, or what's going on with his personal life.
And this is the problem.
The more you expose about your personal life, the LESS interesting you'll be for other people.
There is no way around that.
If the moments we always remember about Meghan is she whining again and again about her struggles,
her personal life and that kind of topics, that turns her into a boring person.
And boring people are not popular.
You cannot escape that.
What's really counterintuitive is that Kate lives a very public life.
As public as it can get.
But the question is, do you really know what's going on with her personal life?
In this moment, you're searching inside your memory and realizing that most things that
you know about Kate's personal life, is from gossip sites, or second-hand evidence.
So... Kate's very private, indeed.
In fact, the Royal Family is quite private, if you think about it.
Of course, now you're thinking about Meghan.
What about her?
she claimed that she wanted privacy, that she didn't want to be in that spotlight, that
she, along with Harry were going to live a quiet life... and what happened?
Yes.
She has talked so much about herself, about her personal life, that she has been slowly
erasing any mystery that she could inspire, in the same way Kate does.
Meghan has played the victim to ellicit a response.
So people could understand her suppossedly "unbearable situation", understand her decisions
and be, in one way or another, relatable, at least as a victim.
Now, you don't have to do a lot of research about the lives of celebrities to find out
that when their personal dramas begin to play a greater portion of their message than the
actual value they offer to their audience, their popularity just crumbles to the ground.
It's not that their audiences are coldhearted or anything.
It's because, if you're an actress, they began to follow you thanks to your roles.
If you're a Youtuber, they began to follow you because of the value you offer.
And if you're a musician, they began to follow you because of your music.
The moment your personal dramas start to spill out and erode the real value you've been giving
to your audience, that is the start of your downfall.
More or less, what Adele became in that sobbing apology.
I don't make the rules, and I'm sure that no matter who are your idols, they have been
through really tough stuff, at any point of their lives.
And maybe they needed to vent it.
They have the right to do so.
But it cannot be the most important, or the most intelligent way to connect with your
audience.
First, because every personal aspect of your life that you reveal, reduces your mystery,
and how interesting you are perceived.
And second, you risk being seen as a privileged, whining brat.
Especially, if you have millions in the bank, all the fame in the world and act like you've
been "struggling".
I know it's never fair to compare people, but it's really hard not to compare both duchesses.
And this time it was a very counterintuitive reason why Catherine is more popular.
The one and only reason is that, even if she has an absolutely public role as part of the
royal family, she's really private about her personal life and that is extremely fascinating
for anyone.
Like a giant cartoon magnet.
Don't forget to apply this tip for yourself.
If you want to refine your observation skills, all you have to do is download my 100+ body
language tips, right in the description of this video.
My name is Jesús Enrique Rosas and it will always be a pleasure, my body language buddies!
Much Love, and Bliss.