- How do you identify in terms of gender identity
and sexual orientation?
- I am a male, which I found out today is cis man.
- I am a bisexual dude.
- I am bisexual.
- A hundred percent bisexual.
- Are you okay with answering some questions
about your coming out experience?
- In the world of professional wrestling,
it was very hard coming out at that time.
So, I had someone help me,
so I am willing to help anyone else.
- He's a pro wrestler, or as I call it, foreplay.
(all laughing loudly) (upbeat music)
- When did you become aware of your sexual orientation?
Mine was at the department store with my mom.
I would always go and look at all of the underwear.
- Oh, the Hanes, the Hanes.
- And then, I would go over to the women
and I'd look at all of the bras and I'd be like, wow.
- Looking at the men's, it was fascinating
but I didn't know why.
And then, I stumbled on some gay porn.
- Did you have to hide it from others?
- I did, yeah.
- Being raised pretty Catholic, yeah.
- I actually didn't.
At 23, I was ready to be like, okay, I have more options.
Like, I could be the all-you-can-eat buffet,
not just like portion sizes over here.
- Being raised religious though, they hit you with that,
give all your energy to the straight thoughts
and the gay ones will just disappear.
That never happened.
- Was there anyone out at that time you looked up to?
- While I'm like, who the hell was out and bi?
- Madonna.
- Well, my time coming out was totally different
because it's like the now, so it's just like,
every celebrity is like,
"Oh my God, I think I'm kind of bi now."
- I looked up to like some other professional wrestler
who had come out like a year ago, his name was Matt Cage.
- Oh, okay, Matt Cage,
so it was like Anthony Bowens also came out.
- Yeah, he came out after I did, so.
- Oh, trendsetter right here.
- I'm just saying.
- Were you afraid to come out to others?
Absolutely. - Yes.
- I was afraid of the people who were gonna punish me
for not telling them something
I wasn't ready to come out with.
- How did your family respond to your coming out?
My family was like,
"Wait, what? That's a thing?"
- I get a phone call, I'm sitting at work.
And then they're like, "So, since when are you gay?
"Last time we checked you weren't."
And I'm like, "Okay, calm down.
"I ran out of girls right now.
"I'm just literally buffering right now until I find 'em."
- My mom said, "Why?"
(all laughing loudly)
That was the thing too where they were like,
"So, are you saying your potential partner
"could be a guy or a girl?
"So, like, why would you choose to be with a guy?"
And finally I was like,
I can't help who's right for me at the end of the day.
- Did anyone in your life have a hard time accepting you?
- Mm hmm. - Not at all.
(chuckles loudly) Not at all.
- Again, kids these days don't know
how f#*king good they have it.
- Oh, I know because I hear stories about how, you know,
and I joined TikTok and I realized
how hateful the world could be, let's be real.
- I grew up in a Christian household.
I would reach out to like friends and they would be like,
so upset, like breaking down, crying,
saying that this was like
me being tempted by the devil and all this sort of stuff.
- How difficult was coming out for you?
It's scary, it's scary.
And it's like, nobody wants to ever admit that it was scary.
It was online for me.
So, it was like, in a matter of a post,
my life was gonna be completely different
and that was so difficult.
It took me like four or five days with the same paragraph,
just to be like, I can do this, I can do this.
- Were there any obstacles you didn't anticipate?
- Gay people.
Yeah, that's still to this day
who I get the most resistance from.
- I got you on that, okay. - You know what I mean?
It's queer people or other members of the alphabet basically
that are the ones that are trying to be like, no.
- Do you feel like you are still coming out?
I would say that I'm constantly coming out
because if I was dating a guy
and another friend would be like,
"Oh, do you have a girlfriend?"
And I would say, "Oh no, I have a boyfriend."
And then, they go, "Oh, you're gay."
And then I'm like,
"Well, no." - That's exactly it.
- You have to weigh it in your head and be like,
is it worth having this conversation?
- That talk is so long too.
- It really is. - Such a long conversation.
You have to pull up things from your past,
you need to be like, "And, in 2009, I slept with this girl."
- You always have to answer that, how do you know?
Is it one more than the other?
And it's like, no.
- Yeah, exactly, you have to answer these questions.
And they expect you to have an answer,
or you're not bisexual, you're just gay.
- It's like the end of an episode of "Scooby-Doo".
They're always trying to be like,
"Aha, he's actually gay." Or something like it's a f*#king
Barbara Walters interview or some s#*t.
- I'm not still coming out as gay or bisexual,
it's I'm still coming out with
having the confidence to reapproach women again.
To where it's like a
little bit more comfortable. - I feel that.
- Because the minute they see any kind of queerness in you,
you're castrated basically.
- And it's just hard though, it is.
- Some cool ones, there is some cool chicks out there.
- How has coming out changed you?
- Honestly, it made me relax.
I didn't feel like I truly started living
until I came out to myself, and then out to everybody.
- I'd say I have a lot less to prove.
And it's like, the minute you relieve yourself of
the ability to convince others
and yourself that you are that thing. (sighs loudly)
- I think it's important to come out as early as you can
and accept yourself, even if you're not ready
to let the world accept you.
- What advice do you have for anyone
who is struggling with coming out?
- The thing that's stopping you could just be you.
And if there are other external factors, I mean,
I definitely would be just thinking about
how you can move towards a more supportive
and uplifting environment
because it does take its toll on you.
- Once you do it, it's so empowering
and you become so much stronger.
- I felt like I was giving a high fives,
there was flags all around, I was like,
"You get some of Nick, you get some of Nick,
you all get some of Nick."