I have been somewhat of a pushover for the majority of my life since listening
to the podcast I've been trying to assert myself more one thing I can't
seem to shake is constantly being interrupted how can I rise above and
overcome this obstacle should I read the hashtag the hashtag fellow hardcore and
there's a little layer in there cuz I put rise above in there you know I
thought about this because I would say I don't get interrupted a lot yeah but I
don't I think that's kind of the current state of me and I think there's a reason
why I don't get interrupted a lot and it's not because you know people are
gonna think oh well that's because you're gonna bash people in the head
with a club mm-hmm that's not the actual answer of why I don't get interrupted
yeah so one thing I think is important is you've heard me say this before the
less people talk the more people listen so when I'm in a group of people that
all want to talk and I want to talk over each other and they want to cut each
other off you get in that group right there III don't talk yeah I don't talk I
let there's I sit there I listen to him and i plot then I think and I put
together my thoughts correctly so that when I do decide to say something it's
going to have impact mm-hmm and then I wait for the right moment right because
if there's people that are bickering back and forth I wait for a lull in the
fire and when that low comes then I make my point in a very direct manner
I might even I might even have to wait until the conversation is like all but
over hmm wait till they're done with their
little fire fight yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep yep and then I'm gonna
talk they're done and and what I when I talk you know I'm gonna do it since I've
been thinking about it's gonna be articulated in a way that I can present
my full point and I so I think that's an effective way to do things I think
I think if you let people speak a bunch you let them get it out of their system
and then when you decide to talk they don't have anything left to say so
that's a way to stop getting cut off so this is almost like flanking right this
is flanking the fact that when people have a bunch to say and they got all
these thoughts in their head and they want to get them all out let them get
them out don't try and fight that battle they've got a bunch of things they want
to say let them say it all so as we know when you listen to someone else talk it
you you now know what their ideas are you know what they're thinking there's a
power and not saying anything because it allows you to think and it allows you to
hear what other people think and it allows you to hear other people so in a
conversation you get to hear other people's counters to what people are
saying and you're not you're not having to expend any ammunition to yourself
someone else is doing it you know the third or fourth or fifth peace person
the conversation that's expending ammunition and running their mouth to
try and solve kantor some point that someone made let
them do that because by the way then you get to see what the other counter is hmm
so I think being assertive doesn't mean talking more I think being assertive
means talking less talking at the appropriate times monitoring and
understanding the fire fight that's happening so that when other people have
expended their ammunition you can step in and you can take your shots in a
simple clear concise manner that's what I think yeah I think you're right I
think you built up this reputation though that's a little added element to
your specific situation which is where when you talk it like you're not saying
fluff you know you're you know when you talk it's like something well that's a
good point so if you don't want to get cut off and 70% of the things that you
say aren't really that impactful and don't add a lot to the conversation well
then there's a good chance that when used to open your mouth to start talking
someone else doesn't think it's gonna be important so they just jump right on top
of you yeah but if you say less and to your point if the things that you say
generally are well thought out and clear and are gonna have imp
well then we have a good chance that you're not going to be cut off even
people actually want to hear what you're gonna say yeah
don't talk just to talk ever yeah see and that's a hard shouldn't say ever but
hardly ever yeah yeah that's a hard on the because and it's not like people are
interrupting you on purpose because you have nothing to say you know like you're
just talking fluff that's nice it's not a conscious on purpose thing a lot of
the time I think anyway doesn't feel like it is um it feels like it's like
subconscious you know like how can someone see fit to actually follow
through with interrupting somebody if they don't think like okay this isn't
quite that important at the very least at the very least what I'm about to
interrupt with is more important so it's very some people think that what they're
about to say is really important yeah here's another thing it's like the
little boy that cried wolf right if I yeah if I talk and talk and talk and
talk and talk I'm taking away the value of each one of those statements that I'm
in because I'm making so many statements that not all of them can have a high
level of value so if well who do you who do you pay more attention to the person
that makes 100 statements yeah and what are those okay let's say you want to pay
attention the person that makes a hundred statements how much can you pay
attention tell those hundred statements how much do you how much do you gather
from those hundred statements oh it's it's a limited amount mm-hmm it's one
percent per statement right what's one person you have to feel you will do you
think I make some hesitate that's one percent per statement if the person says
one thing how much percent do you pay attention that on that's right rosette
so there you go yeah makes sense to check