Hey guys, thanks for joining this week. We are talking about
something that I know we can all use and
I know this is going to be one of those videos that you can just watch over and over again if you're ever
Needing a little dose of confidence in your life
so this week, we're going to dive into
Self-confidence, and more specifically I'm going to give you five tips
That you can start implementing in your life to increase your own self-confidence
And if you haven't already don't forget to hit the subscribe button below so you can be informed when I upload my latest videos
So let's get right into this week's video
So the first thing towards having more self-confidence is self-care, and this can mean a lot of different things you know everything from
Getting your nails done getting your hair cut regularly you know wearing the clothes that make you feel the most confident
So for some women may be wearing heels makes you feel confident for others
Maybe just a cool pair of flare jeans and a great t-shirt. That's where you feel the most confident in yourself
For a guy you know sometimes
Wearing just a baseball hat and a cool t-shirt is something that makes you feel really confident or wearing a really nice
suit it makes you feel a little bit better about yourself, and you have more self-esteem in yourself, so anything from
You know like I said getting your hair done getting your nails done and going to the gym is great
Self-Care now after we're done our energy level has increased we feel great about ourselves
And also the payoff is our body start looking great in the minimum. You start seeing those results
We start going to the gym a little bit more something that's really simple that I know increases
Anyone's self-confidence, and their energy level is standing up straight
And this is something that I struggle with for years because I always slouched over
And I think it's because you know I'm a woman and at times people would look in certain areas
And I would feel a little self-conscious, but the minute you kind of put your shoulders back
And you sit up straight or you or you walk?
And you're just standing up straight you have more confidence in yourself your energy is a little bit lighter and more positive
Whereas when we're sponged over or excuse me slouched over and we're walking tend to just kind of
Not have as much confidence in ourselves
So definitely putting your shoulders back standing with a little bit more presence this isn't about arrogance
Or cockiness is just about just self loving just standing straight even when you're about to approach someone either in a restaurant or a bar
Gives you a level of self-confidence that you wouldn't have had had you been you know kind of slouched over
So definitely stand up straight to help increase your self-confidence
The next is make a list about you now
if you've seen any of my videos, and when I've been talking about dating or just trying to
attract a great partner into your life
Or meet a great person one of the things that I always recommend is make a list of what you're looking for and helps you
to get really clear as to the things that are important to you and the things that you would want in a partner and
I have my clients get very specific
I mean sometimes we're talking a couple pages long of just everything that they would want in a partner
And it really helps them get excited
And hopeful and it helps them really get clear as to what they're looking for now
This is something that I want you to do for yourself you make that
Stephanie list or Bob lists or whatever and you list all the things that make you an amazing?
Human being all the things that you really love about yourself. So if you're a person that
You know is very
Nurturing and that's something that you just love about yourself that goes on the list and as you start going down the list on
everything that you love about yourself really be in that moment of
Appreciating who you are maybe even in this list you write down all the things
Physically that you love about yourself like you love your arms
Or you have you know great legs or anything you have a flat stomach whatever it
Is that you love about yourself the next thing is surround yourself with people that love you
unconditionally that are going to lift you up when you fall and this is so important because we're human and
we're going to fall we're going to have moments of
Self-doubt and we're going to have times where we're going to forget who we are and all the great qualities that we have within ourselves
And these people are in your life to help you remind yourself of all of that
It's not their job to fix you or to constantly be that person in your life
But they're there to help you along the way there help you to give you that little boost of self-confidence
That you need so you can then run with it and take over the show and say okay
I remember who I am now, and I got this and go back to that list and reread it you know
Maybe that's what you need to do is have someone remind you of everything you know that you've done that makes you an accomplished amazing
Smart talented person
And then go back to that list and really sit with that list and read it and be in the moment of each of those
Things that allows you to be the person that you are
The next thing is learn how to unconditionally love yourself. This is where you embrace
Everything about yourself
this is where you embrace all the stuff that even you don't love you know we can be so
Self-Critical at times and we can have such negative self-talk
You know when we're looking in the mirror and our selves or we're trying on clothes or we're doing
Anything just all of that negative talk that comes forward we can be so hard on ourselves
This is where you have to embrace
everything so if you have some curves that you don't like and
Your stomach's not where you want it to be or you have the flabby arms?
Or you know your hair isn't what you would want it to be you want to have really straight
Fine hair, and you've got the big hair the reality is when we're so hard on ourselves, and we're so critical
We're searching for this ideal. That doesn't exist
Perfection doesn't exist even the people that you see that you think
You know are so beautiful or have it all they have
Insecurities themselves they have stuff about them that they wish that they could change
So this is about being human and realizing that we're all perfect the way
We are that we should love everything about ourselves
That just because we don't maybe look the way we want to look or have the things that we want to have
Doesn't mean that. We're less than it's about loving yourself and having the confidence in yourself regardless of the things that you don't always
Love about yourself the next thing is positive self-talk and this is
we
critical in order for you to have
healthy
Self-confidence, and self-esteem in yourself if you don't have positive self-talk you won't believe in yourself
You won't think you're a good person everything that you think and believe is because the story that you're telling yourself in your mind
So one of the things that I always tell clients to do when they're trying to practice having more positive self-talk is
start practicing number one
self-Awareness
When you can be aware as to when those negative thoughts are taking over or starting to creep in you can immediately start
Shutting them down, and they're not going to be easy to shut down in the beginning, and that's okay
Don't judge yourself for it
but one of the ways that I only teach people to
Start to be aware when that negative stuff comes in is how do you feel?
when you're having a negative
Moment, and you're just letting that negative self-talk take over you feel it everywhere. You feel I know for me
I don't feel good. I feel ouch you know sobs over or I just feel my energy levels low
I don't have confidence myself. I'm not believing in myself. I don't feel hopeful and positive
I don't feel all the things that I want to feel so if I'm not feeling that and I'm feeling something else stress or
being anxious or
You know anything just unhappy
There's always a story that I just told myself that me that allowed me to get to that place and what is that story?
So practicing self-awareness
will allow you to
Stay connected with what you're feeling
So what is going on in your body?
One of the things that I tell people to do is set a reminder on your phone throughout the day
So as the day goes on when that reminder comes on check in with yourself and really check in. How are you feeling?
are you feeling stressed or irritated or Angry or
You know unhappy or anything and ask yourself? What am I feeling you'll
100% be able to answer that question and then ask yourself again
Why do I feel that way and when you start really digging into that you'll come to the answer?
sometimes it can happen right away, and you'll get that answer as soon as you ask the question and
It takes a while to get there
But the minute you get there that's when the self parenting comes into play and what I mean by self parenting is self parenting
it's
Basically the long and the short of it is it's how you treat a child
You know if you were a parent, how would you treat your child and I learned about self parenting years ago?
But I didn't really get into it and really start practicing it honestly until I became a parent
But you don't need to have kids in order for you to self parent
This is about giving yourself the stuff that you would give someone that you love
Unconditionally or someone that's a great person great friend. You know mother father spouse anything in your life
How would you treat that person?
You know if that person came to you, and they were just feeling low and they had no self-confidence
They didn't believe in themselves
What are the things that you would say to that person to help them through it and help them remember who they are?
so now when a negative thought comes in I immediately go into a parenting mode and
I imagine what would I say to my son if that was something that he was thinking about?
Himself, I would immediately go in and tell him the truth, but that's 100% not true
You're an amazing person
And I would encourage him and love him and give him all the support
That he needed and validate everything that he's going through her feeling self parenting is
absolutely huge, and this is something that will a
percent change your entire life when you learn how to do it
it's a huge aspect of self-love and
It's the thing that will allow you to take control over
All of that negative stuff that comes in you know we can't stop our ego from happening. It's there
It's always going to be with us
It's always going to have
These thoughts that come in that want to keep us where we are they want you wants to keep us stuck
It wants to keep us living in fear and all of that negative stuff is what's coming from your ego?
But when you get in touch with who you are your soul your essence all of that. Good stuff
That's on that list that you made that's when you remind yourself absolutely not. I don't need any of that negative self-talk
That's happening right now
And you're able to change your story and the more you practice this the easier
to become and that negative voice gets smaller and smaller the other thing with positive self-talk and
Making your list and doing all this stuff is sometimes
You know people are so low that they they struggle with making that list you know for me
It actually took me a couple of days to make my love to keep going back
To it because it's so easy to look at someone you love and go boom boom boom
This is all the things that make you amazing and you're giving your that's do that, but when it comes to ourselves
Sometimes we can struggle. We'll probably have a good 10 to 20 on the list, but after that it's like what else about me
So it took me a while to get there and but the minute
I had that list I put it somewhere where I always knew what it was
Usually I carried it around with me, and I brought it out any time
I was having a moment where I needed to go back to it where I needed to give myself that boost in order for me
to really believe in myself
The other thing is you know listening to positive affirmations
While it's not going to completely change your world it is something that helps
You to come up with new stuff to think about in terms of yourself
So sometimes when we're struggling with that list listening to affirmations is really helpful
I know at a certain point in my life when my
Self-confidence has been low at times listening to affirmations was huge and it was something that I did
Right in the meringue when I was getting ready, and it was something
I did you know before I went to bed and I would just put a headset in and just listen to it
It allowed me to kind of remember who I am
And it helped me to really start loving myself to remember that I am a good person
Go down that list that I made of all the things that make me an amazing human being
So I hope you guys got some great takeaways from this video
This is definitely something that you can watch over and over again when you're feeling down
You know just remember self confidence is something that we're not going to always have at every moment of our lives
And it's something that takes practice all of these things take practice, but when you start to put yourself first and really start loving yourself
You will know that you're an amazing and amazing human being that you're capable of anything that you want to achieve?
or anything that you want to have in your life, and
Really doing these things will help you to get to a really happy and content place in your life
Where you believe in yourself? You know you're a good person, and you truly truly love yourself
so if you liked this video
Please give it a thumbs up if you have any questions
Or comments. Don't forget to leave it in the comment section below and I will see you next time