Donald Trump's still not accepting
the results of the presidential election,
but we have a sponsor who may be able to help.
(Conan singing nonsense)
(intense music)
Hi, I'm Shaquille O'Neal.
Don't believe me?
Then I'll see you in court.
And I'm Meryl Streep, and I'm also wearing a suit.
Don't believe me, then I'll see you in court, as well.
Is reality not what you want it to be?
Did you lose a presidential election
and aren't able to accept that reality?
Then hire us.
The law firm of O'Neal and Streep.
And we will help you
[Together] Sue reality.
If you want to challenge the fabric of reality itself,
you need Shaquille O'Neal and Maryl Streep in your corner.
And that's who we say we are.
My socks and my shoes are large
because I'm Shaquille O'Neal.
I'll take on your case with the same determination
that won me four NBA Championships.
And I'll give you the same passion
that won me the number of Oscars that I have.
Most of the women I date are very much tinier than me
'cause I'm large.
We've helped thousands of clients.
Reality said our client wasn't famous.
We took reality to court and won.
Reality said our client wasn't a good singer.
We took reality to court and won.
Reality said our client wasn't Black.
We took reality to court and won.
Reality said our client wasn't handsome
and alluring to women.
We took reality to court.
Why did we put that one in the ad?
We lost.
Don't trust us?
Take it from this person who knows us.
[Deep Voice] You fools.
Reality says that President Trump
didn't win the 2020 election.
You know who to call, Donald.
Call the law firm of O'Neal and Streep.
Dial 555-555-5-5555.
[Narrator] With offices located in New York,
Paris, Rio, Mars, Prague, and Wakanda.