Hi, everybody.
Welcome to the show.
Thank you for being here.
Actually, thank you for being there.
I'm guessing you're there.
You might not be there.
Some of you thought you had enough time
to run to the kitchen and get a snack,
so some people may not be here.
So I'm going to wait for them to get back.
Thanks to those people, we all have
to sit here and wait for them.
[CHUCKLE]
You know what?
I'm just going to go ahead.
Well, we're more than a month into our quarantine,
and I know that this is a difficult time
for so many people.
My hope is that I can lift your spirits a little each day.
You know, I've been working out a lot,
so I feel strong enough that I can lift all of your spirits
at the same time.
[CHUCKLE]
If I could put you on my back, I would squat all of you
right now.
Wait, what?
I don't know.
OK.
So I am very, very grateful that I'm
able to do the show from home.
But recently, I was thinking about ways
that I would make it a little more like the show
that I used to do in my studio.
So what I used to do is I'd come out
and, occasionally, I'd just be in a wild and crazy mood,
and I would throw a mint in the air really, really high up
and catch it in my mouth.
Anybody remember that?
Yeah.
It was a long time ago.
20, 25 years ago.
Not really that long ago.
That's an exaggeration.
OK.
Like 15.
No.
It was just--
I did it this season.
Oh, OK.
I guess you didn't pay attention to that part.
Anyway, I thought I could do it here.
I don't have any mints, but I do have some olives.
I haven't gotten through my tequila yet,
so I haven't moved on to vodka.
So I still have some martini olives ready to go,
and I don't want to waste a lot of them, but here we go.
All right.
I'm going to it seated, too.
I've never tried this before seated.
[CHUCKLE]
Oh!
Almost!
Got it?
No.
Almost.
Hold on.
This is good TV.
[CHUCKLE]
Anywhere close?
Oh, my eye.
You did it?
No.
Oh.
No.
One last one.
I think this is the one.
Please.
Well.
I didn't do it.
I'm going to still give you the point.
And usually when you toss it up, I
do the number it took and give you a point.
I'm still going to give you the point, though.
Thank you because that was harder than I thought.
I didn't rehearse it.
I don't know if you could tell, but I didn't rehearse it.
[LAUGHING]
I think you used up a lot of time.
Well, that's all we've got now is time.
Another thing that makes it feel like my regular show is
my executive producer, Andy--
usually, Andy is kind of behind the camera
dropping things making a lot of noise,
or texting, or giggling if I say a word like [INAUDIBLE]..
But because of social distancing, he's in the yard.
Yup.
Living here three weeks so far.
Yes.
God, I miss my kids.
[LAUGHING]
All right.
Andy, since you're here and I don't
have anyone else to play with, we're going to play a game, OK?
Yes.
This is a brand new game.
OK.
I don't know if this is going to work,
but the olives sure did so let's see how this does.
So you have to get--
you make noises only.
OK.
I can't-- I don't want to see you.
You're going to have to move into a different area
because I can see you in my monitor right now.
So you move someplace where I can't see you,
and there's an envelope, and you open the envelope,
and you have to make noises.
Or you can move around, but I can't see you anyway.
And I have to guess what you're trying to get me to say.
It's called "Huh?
What?"
What?
Huh?
What?
So you can make noise and you can move your body around,
and then I'm going to guess what you're trying to get me to say.
Just by sound, but I act.
Yes, but you can act and make sound.
OK.
I have my eyes closed and it's--
OK.
[MOANING AND GRUNTING]
[BABY CRYING NOISES]
You know, if you're a baby, then that's--
No.
[GRUNTING]
[BABY CRYING NOISES]
[LAUGHING]
I have no idea what you're doing.
It's a woman having a baby.
Oh my God.
Yes.
I was pushing and then it cried.
Oh my God.
Well, there could have been up a slap and then
and then the baby cries after that.
OK.
Then I would have gotten it.
OK, great.
OK.
Let's do another one.
I like this game.
Do another one.
[VOCALIZATION]
[LAUGHING]
Don't make me laugh.
[VOCALIZATION]
Are you tickling somebody?
No.
[VOCALIZATION]
[LAUGHING]
I'm sorry.
You're going to have to tell me what you're doing.
A woodpecker.
Well, that was probably good.
It sounded like a woodpecker, actually.
There's no way I know how to--
[GRUNTING]
[LAUGHING]
I don't know.
You have to at least be able to see.
Well, the whole point the game is that--
Who made the rules?
I did.
[GRUNTING]
[LAUGHING]
Nothing?
[LAUGHING]
Are you Santa stuck in a chimney?
It's a sumo wrestler.
Oh.
Yeah.
Sure.
Is there another one?
Apparently there is.
It's going well.
OK.
I don't even know what this means, but--
OK.
I don't know what this means, so this might--
[INAUDIBLE]
Lightning and thunder?
A whale breaching.
Oh, this I've got.
OK.
This one you will definitely get.
All right.
[BUZZING SOUND]
It's a weed whacker.
You're getting the weeds along the side of a driveway.
For [BLEEP] sake.
[LAUGHING]
[BUZZING SOUND]
You--
Oh!
Ah!
[SCREAMING]
[LAUGHING]
Please tell me.
I have no idea what you just did.
A swarm of bees, and I was getting stung.
Oh my God.
Have we had enough?
Yes because I need to-- my eyes are soaking
wet from crying laughing.
All right.
That's how you play "Huh?
What?"
Thanks.
Oh, tWitch.
tWitch, could you guess any of those?
No, and I was watching him.
[LAUGHING]
Oh my God.
Look, next time I don't close my eyes
because we'll play it again.