Well hi! Sorry this episode is a little short and a little late.
Asynchrony is actually based in the Bay Area so that fire you've been hearing so much about is pretty much in our
backyard.
Some people we love didn't exactly make it out so, um... we were a little, let's just say, uh... distracted this week.
Anyway, we will be back at our normal operating temperature next time with dick jokes and all.
Assuming our eyes can focus long enough through the grief-fueled day drinking to see a typewriter.
And yes, we use typewriters.
On a more personal note, we wanted to thank all of you so much.
Getting to know all of you twisted motherfuckers has been the highlight of our year.
The love you've given us, consensual or otherwise, is one of the things that's gotten us through a lot of carnage.
If you didn't know, we raised almost $6000 for Extra Life.
And for our first time extorting strangers out of money for charity, we're pretty fucking psyched how it turned out.
Now we have one more favor to ask you.
A lot of people we know are going to be suffering in the coming months.
And if you can, we would love your help. We setup a fundraiser to benefit the Oakland ghost fire here.
If you have any extra cash left over for your kilo of sweet sweet Colombian nose sugar, please go here to donate.
Consider it a personal favor to me, your friendly neighborhood fister man.
And anyone who donates gets thanks in the next show. Alright enough of the real shit.
Onwards and upwards motherfuckers.
Yeah, that’s what the bouncer said.
Mad Manny’s Merry Manly Mart for Magnificent Merchandise, Macho Materials, and Majestic
Machinery.
That... was a lot of alliteration.
I will install Norton Antivirus on you I swear to god.
What exactly are we here to buy?
I don’t know I guess we’ll know when we see it?
Okay, well, after you then.
*thud* DAMN IT.
Sorry, dude. Looks like you might have to stay behind.
WHAT?! NO! NOT COOL! I WANTED TO GET MY FLEEK ON.
It’s okay, we’ll get you like a scarf or something.
Oh haha mother fuc-
Man that dude has some serious pent up energy.
Waiting around for a few hundred years will probably do that to you.
We should if we can get him laid tonight.
Not sure.
Maybe we can just get him a lapda- err... forehead dance.
Yeah, maybe introduce him to a nice figurehead or something.
Maybe find you a special someone while we’re at it?
Umm...
I...
Edna I-
Wooooooow if sputnik here thinks you need to get some ass, then the situation is critical.
What has gotten into you?
That sentry got her circuits all sparky.
What do you mean a while?
Yes.
Bumped hard drives?
He get all up in your software?
Oh EDNA...
Did you at least use a firewall.
Oh no... you catch any viruses?
Well, well.
You dirty little slut.
What do you mean by that?
Look I get the sense that we’re about to unpack some serious interpersonal shit.
And as much as I want to be the arbitrator for armored-couples counseling, maybe we should
focus on the task at hand?
Couldn’t have said it better myself.
... I don’t know how I feel about this.
Yeah we understand that, let me...
... us take the lead here.
Okay...
I guess.
Found anything?
Well, nothing you would be interested in.
Find something?
Nothing jumps to mind.
Where do you think it all came from?
Do we care?
Well hey there valued customer!
I think I’m finally okay with this.
Fucking took you long enough.
Welcome, to Mad Manny’s Merry Manly Mart for Magnificent Merchandise, Macho Materials,
and Majestic Machinery my merry awwMMMMMMigos.
What can I do for you?
We... are umm...
Spit it out, what what, time is money and you boys are breaking the bank.
Are you Manny?
Look at the brain box on this one.
We’re in the market for some... apparel.
What chu mean?
We need some lounge wear.
You mean like a dress?
No we-
Or like, a sexy harness.
No-
How about a leopard print thong.
Wait-
What about a nice set of pasties?
Red neglige?
Spanks?
How bout a decorative butt plug.
No look buddy-
Come on buddy.
Help me out here.
Help me help help you so I can get you the fuck out of my store.
Oh.
Brotherhood?
Yep.
Oh right.
Got just the thing.
Why’s that?
Well won’t this be fun then.
You almost done in there?
Yeah just a second.
Hows it look?
Dear god, I hope this works.
Damn dude, can you hurry up already?
Aww... who's a pretty kitty witty?