Ever since the explosive Oprah interview aired, I’ve been wondering why Prince Harry has
stayed with Meghan Markle and continued to support her through her attempt to destroy
the reputation of the royal family.
He doesn’t seem particularly happy to me, and there are times that he seems downright
distressed.
It’s been reported that Harry was surprised by some of the things Meghan revealed during
the interview, including her claims of racism from the family.
So if he isn’t very happy and maybe feels blind sided by her at times or even silenced
- why does he stay?
The obvious answer is that he has a child with her, and is about have another.
And many people who’ve known Meghan and Harry up close have talked about how Harry
almost seems hooked on Meghan.
But I think there’s a little more to it, because I think Harry stays with her because
Meghan gives him the opportunity to play out the drama cycle with her.
For those of you not familiar with the drama cycle, let me explain -
It’s a situation in which one person identifies themselves as the victim, and accuses someone
else as the perpetrator.
This creates a vacuum for someone to step up as the hero, in order to save the victim
from the perpetrator.
Which is of course exactly what is happening when it comes to Meghan, Harry and his family.
In one of my previous videos I had mentioned how I think Prince Harry always had this desire
to save his mother, to be her hero, but of course couldn’t since he was only a young
boy when she passed away.
And now Meghan Markle is having him play out his fantasy by playing the Diana-esque victim,
who he’s rescuing from his monstrous family.
This desire to play the hero, and rescue the victim is a very attractive feeling.
In fact, I find myself trying to do the same thing sometimes - which is to rush in and
solve problems for the people around me, regardless of whether they’ve asked for help or not.
It’s so attractive because it fuels a sense of self-importance.
Look at me - I’m a protector, I protect my family.
But this feeling only lasts as long as you play into the narrative of victim and perpetrator.
For Harry and Meghan the supply of perpetrators is seemingly endless - from the British press,
to the British people, to Prince Charles cutting Harry off financially, Princess Anne asking
about the baby’s color, or the the firm locking Meghan up in a tower, to Kate making
Meghan cry (which I don’t believe for a second by the way), or Prince William telling
Harry to take it slowly with Meghan.
But the problem with playing into the drama cycle is that your view of the world becomes
very black and white - i.e. you’re either on our side or our enemy.
So the ultimate result is that you are very fragmented from family and friends, constantly
perpetuating your own victim status.
Now Meghan of course is the queen of tossing people out of her life, from half siblings,
her father, and extended family, to friends, and her ex-husband.
Every time driving home the point that she is the victim, and they are the perpetrators.
And we’re seeing Harry repeat the same pattern of isolating himself from his friends, his
home and country, and his family.
I mean you can hardly be the defender of the ultimate victim without punishing the people
who supposedly victimized her.
The drama cycle is also a form of maintaining intense control in a situation that would
otherwise feel very out of control.
You see when Harry and Meghan feel wronged, it feels easier to them to buy into the narrative
of being wronged, rather than taking any responsibility or ownership of their own actions.
The position of victim is a very empowering one, since it gives them the moral sanction
to punish the people they feel wronged by - which is exactly what they did when they
lashed out at the royal family during the Oprah interview.
And in order to maintain their sense of moral superiority, Meghan and Harry keep perpetuating
the drama cycle.
I found it very interesting that Meghan Markle after Prince Philips passing, pointed out
that she and Prince Philip had the most in common since they were both outsiders.
This not only served the purpose of drawing attention to her, but also once again reinforced
the point that she’s a victim.
What’s incredibly ridiculous though is that Prince Philip and Meghan Markle are nothing
alike.
With his death, there were so many moving tributes to an incredible man - and the most
important thing that many people pointed out was that he represented the old guard - the
stiff upper lip - the get on with it perspective that is very much emblematic of him and her
Majesty the Queen.
Those of you already familiar with Prince Philip’s life will know all this - that
he actually lived a harder life than we would expect.
Despite being born into royalty himself, as a Prince of Greece and Denmark, his life was
torn apart when the monarchy was deposed in Greece, and Philip and his entire family were
banished.
His father went off to live in the south of France with his mistress, and his mother was
placed in an asylum.
So Prince Philip was left without a country, with out a home and without a family.
During his long marriage with her Majesty the Queen, Prince Philip sacrificed his work
for the sake of duty, leaving his career in the navy to stand a few steps behind his wife
and serve the people.
And I haven’t even mentioned his time serving during the war, and the major difficulties
he faced at court during his early married years.
Through everything, Prince Philip’s motto was to get on with it and make the best of
it.
So it is interesting that Meghan would compare herself to Prince Philip, since they literally
represent opposite philosophies.
Now please don’t misunderstand, I’m not saying people shouldn’t talk about their
problems and should just bottle everything up.
Not at all, people should share their issues but not on the public stage, not during a
sit-down with Oprah which is carefully edited to make themselves look like the righteous
victims.
Personal problems are just that - personal, and family issues should be solved anywhere
but on the public stage.
That’s what make’s Prince Philip’s life a successful one.
Yes, he had issues, but he worked through them privately and continued to do his work,
an example by which Prince William and Katherine definitely live by.
William and Kate are literally antithetical to Meghan and Harry’s Drama cycle, because
they embody the empowerment cycle.
This is the idea that instead of being the victim, you think of yourself as the creator,
meaning that you take responsibility for your life, stop complaining about things happening
to you, and recognize that you have the power to change your outcomes.
The perpetrator in this situation becomes the challenger, someone who offers the creator
an opportunity to evolve beyond their limitations.
And the hero turns int the coach, so instead of rushing in to solve the victim’s problems,
the coach is someone who pushes the creator to over come their challenges.
Katherine definitely could have played the victim game, since she certainly faced her
fair share of media scrutiny and struggles on her way down the aisle with Prince William.
But that doesn’t seem to ever be the way she looks at herself.
And Prince William has served as a great coach, empowering Katherine to overcome the challenges
posed by entering the royal family, and the incredibly harsh spotlight that comes with
it.
And it is this commitment to privately working through their issues that has earned William
and Katherine the respect of the world rather than intense annoyance that more and more
people feel for Harry and Meghan.
So while Harry feels a sense of purpose at the idea of playing Hero to Meghan the victim,
I don’t think it’s going to bring him any sort of happiness or fulfillment in the
long run.
I think Prince Philip’s life is such an inspiration - and as the former Australian
Prime Minister Tony Abbott said of Prince Philip’s passing, “Death is inevitable,
but a good life is not.”
Thank you everyone for tuning in!
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