- It's the middle of winter
and the wind is blowing.
You're at the grocery store
and you're pushing your cart out to your car.
You get to your car, open the trunk,
load the groceries, and you turn,
you see that the cart return's about 50 yards away.
And now it's starting to sleet and blow.
What are you gonna do?
Are you gonna take the cart back?
Are you gonna leave it?
Are you gonna try to fit it in between cars?
What's your move?
In this video, I'm gonna talk about
how little things like that
impact your confidence and the way that you view the world
and also talk about some little changes that you can make
to improve your confidence.
I'm also gonna talk about some trends
that I see going on in our culture and society
to help you better understand what's going on
and also how to position yourself within that.
You know, a lot of times,
it's easy just to kinda ride the trends
as opposed to assess them for yourself
to realize what's really going on
and see what your thoughts really are in the trend.
You know, I always see people, so many times,
all they do when they're talking about politics,
is regurgitate the last talking head that they saw
and whatever news station that they like,
and they don't even think things through for themselves.
And it shows,
'cause you ask them one question to clarify their position
and they don't know.
They just get mad because they've never thought it through.
It just sounded nice when the silver fox said it on TV.
So anyway, I wanna talk about a big picture
called renter versus owner mentality.
And bear with me,
this is the first time I've talked about this
and I've been thinking about it for probably six months.
But it's still kind of just the framework,
and I'm sure I'll get more clarity as time progresses.
And I can work through these ideas more in my head.
But I wanted to get this out
'cause I think it's very interesting,
I think you'll appreciate this.
So what do I mean by a renter's mentality?
Well, what does a renter of a house do?
Do they really care if something goes wrong in 10 years?
No, it's the owner's responsibility.
Are they really keeping that thing up and clean
as they would if it was their own?
Usually not.
Whereas an owner living in their house,
they are, because they take responsibility.
I wanna talk about your perspective
on being a renter or an owner of the world.
I know it sounds kind of ambiguous and a big idea,
but I think it'll make more sense that I get through it.
So, so many people are either on one end or the other.
And the people who view themselves as a renter,
what might they do?
Probably not return carts.
Probably litter.
I mean, a big trend that I see
is these bird scooters, and these Uber scooters,
you know, the motorized ones that are electric.
People think it's funny to kick 'em over,
and to throw 'em into lakes.
Why do they do that?
Think about that,
why are they really doing that?
Why are they vandalizing these scooters?
Because they can.
There's no way they could get in trouble for it
and they're a renter,
so they're getting away with what they can.
They're sticking it to The Man
because as a renter,
you feel like the establishment and everyone is above you.
They're out to get you,
they're out to control you.
Your city, the police, the government,
the Illuminati, whoever.
They're all against you.
You're a renter,
so when I get a chance,
I'm gonna stick it to 'em.
It's just like when people go out to restaurants
and the minute they're paying,
they act like they're some big boss in the room
to the person because they can.
It's their big chance to feel powerful.
To get back at the establishment.
Haha, these people put these scooters out there,
I'm gonna show them.
This is my time to get back at them.
Who?
Who are they getting back at?
Some investor in Silicon Valley?
Some kids in a startup?
They don't even care!
They just want any instance
that they can get back at The Man.
Who's The Man?
Why are you doing that to the Uber?
I mean, Uber's like a private company.
Why are you doing that to the bird scooter?
Ah, haha, it's funny.
Haha, they're never gonna get me.
Haha, it's funny.
It's so ridiculous.
When you look at people who have low status,
that people treat poorly, right,
they go out, anywhere they go,
people kind of ignore 'em.
At work, they don't get promoted.
What kind of mentality do you think they have?
Almost always, a renter's mentality.
And that builds on itself.
Because the more people treat them bad,
the more they wanna feel that power and that influence.
The one time they actually have an impact on something.
If that's throwing away $150 scooter,
well, at least they're doing something
and they're having an impact.
At least they know they're real
and they can make some sort of move in this world.
It's very sad and it shows the lower status.
Renters have the lowest status.
Now what about an owner?
An owner might grab a cart that's not even theirs
and put it back.
An owner might volunteer.
An owner realizes the police, the government,
it's just them.
Who do you think makes these bodies up?
It's just them.
They could be a police officer,
they could run for the government.
They could be in that position.
They're doing us a service.
I'm not saying that either branch is perfect,
but they're an owner,
they're a part of it.
They're helping,
they're not isolated.
It's not people against them,
and as an owner, you don't litter.
You don't feel good about that, okay?
So that's the big picture,
and I'd ask you,
how do you feel about those things?
When you don't return the cart,
how do you feel about that?
'Cause that leads me into my next point.
When you do things
that you feel like you're slipping one by,
what does that do to your integrity?
How do you feel about yourself?
Renters feel like if no one's watching,
then anything they do bad or out of character,
or that has low integrity,
it doesn't matter.
'Cause no one's watching, no one's there.
An owner realizes everything they do,
their subconscious is watching.
They know what they're doing.
Their self-confidence, and self-image,
and self-esteem is massively impacted by that.
And I would argue,
that is the most important viewer.
You're watching the movie of your life
in real time, all the time.
There's already even a split second
where you don't see what you're doing
and your brain is forming an image of who you are.
That's why integrity,
when I was younger,
I remember I used to take a little karate!
And one of the things was integrity.
And I always remember thinking,
what is that?
Why is that really important?
Like integrity?
And then you realize that integrity aligns
with what you feel about yourself,
which is the most important perspective
you can possibly have.
Talk about true confidence.
Talk about integrity.
I feel like those two things are very, very well aligned.
You don't see people
with true rock solid confidence and charisma
that don't have a lot of integrity.
They live along the moral lines that they've decided
are the right moral lines for them.
That they can feel good about,
therefore they can be confident in their actions.
Even when you're making an action or making a decision
that you're not completely sure about,
if it falls within your lines of integrity,
you can do that confidently.
That's why leaders all have strong integrity
'cause a lot of times you have to make decisions
with ambiguity around there.
There's no clear cut decision.
But are people gonna believe you
or follow you if you're like,
yeah, I think we should do this.
It's ambiguous.
No, and one guy's like no,
what about this?
Versus a guy, even if it's ambiguous decision,
and not everyone's behind,
he's like I see it this way,
I feel like this, we're gonna do this.
People aren't gonna question that
because they can see he's confident in it.
And the only way to gain true confidence in that
is to have integrity as a person.
Now, let's look at a little more
of a scientific perspective on this
as opposed to just my thoughts.
So charity has been shown through data
to be an attractive characteristic.
Both as far as attracting someone of the opposite sex
or someone you're attracted to,
or just being an attractive person for other people,
a charismatic person, I should probably use that term.
Why is it?
Think about it for a minute,
why would you think that a charitable person,
or someone seeing a charitable gift or donation,
why would that be attractive to other people?
Because it shows abundance.
Is anyone who doesn't have enough for themselves
gonna give someone else something?
Probably not.
They have their necessities covered.
Any time people see abundance, it's attractive,
'cause number one, the person is successful,
but number two, it shows a mentality.
I have enough, I'm fine.
It means a lot for me to help somebody else.
And it also shows kind of a growth, mature mindset.
Because as we do grow,
this is another thing that I kind of,
when I was growing up,
you hear these people like Tony Robbins and stuff,
and their books, these people who have been around
and studied successful people.
So you know they know what they're talking about.
But they're like, the highest happiness is giving back.
You know, giving away.
Like I'm not happy making more money.
I always remember thinking,
yeah, easy for you to say.
You have a bunch of money,
you've made it all, right?
I haven't.
Let me be in that position.
And then you do realize,
not that I've made a ridiculous amount of money or anything,
but you do realize that by helping people,
it really does provide a true sense of satisfaction.
And like a dopamine spike, when it boils down to it,
from a scientific perspective,
we're all looking for dopamine spikes
that makes us feel good.
And when you help people,
it really does create a dopamine spike.
And you can continue with that.
Because as people make more money,
it gets to a point where the dopamine spike
doesn't go up as much anymore,
and every time we help people,
it does continually have that.
So giving back and helping people is a continual source
of true satisfaction for people.
This is a little different type of video
that I normally do.
Let me know in the comments below what you think.
I'm trying to kinda partition my videos into two things.
Number one will be analyzing kind of trending things.
You know, sometimes politics,
sometimes just very interesting interactions
that I can break down and teach what's actually going on
to help you out.
And then some of are gonna be more what I call talking head,
where I'm just on here going through,
whether it be studies, or ideas that I have,
that I think help and can contribute
to your social confidence and social awareness.
So, let me know what you think about that.
If you wanna see what I mean
with one of these analysis videos,
I've got one right here of Bill Maher
going up against Ben Shapiro.
It's called an alpha battle analysis.
They're both very well-spoken,
and they're kinda going at it.
So I'm gonna break down the strategies they use
so you can click here
and I'll talk to you in that video now.