- Boo boop!
So fancy!
Better than botox!
We're in a race against time.
It might get a little messy.
Don't you hate when a recipe just won't give up?
Oh, thank God most of this is parmesan.
(jazzy music)
Hello everybody and welcome to "My Drunk Kitchen - Pie Day".
I don't always love sweets.
So today we're going to be making a savory pie.
And not actually a pie, a series of mini pies,
in this peg-board looking thing.
Call back.
(satisfied hum)
Look how fancy this vodka is.
This vodka says I'm beautiful both inside and out.
The first step in making a shepherd's mini pie,
is to have all the ingredients,
which I have laid out before you
and I've also put in a list right here
for your viewing convenience.
Now my goal for this episode of My Drunk Kitchen...
(Snapping noise)
Hello?
And My personal goal for this My Drunk Kitchen
is to make it an episode that you
can actually follow along with.
So do your best to try and make this.
Heads up, if it sucks at the end, don't make it.
But this is a journey we'll go in together.
And so, here we go, Step number one.
Ooh, have the recipe.
Whisk first four ingredients in a large bowl.
Why wouldn't you just say what
the first four ingredients were?
Flour, paprika, salt and ground pepper.
And then, this is one third, got it, okay.
(clatter)
(Panicked gasp)
Awe, these are adorable and heart shaped, oh my god.
Is it just me or is a tablespoon always
way bigger than you think it is?
♪ And I'm gonna hate it ♪
If you have coarse kosher salt.
That's a real mouthful, coar-sh kosher sh-alt.
Coarse col...
Coar...
Coarse. Kosher. Salt.
Phew, say that ever, once.
Freshly ground black pepper.
I mean, are we having a "teal" moment or what? You know?
Man, cooking is time consuming.
You know, what minute are we at?
Two and a half? One?
Depends on how much editing Hanna wanted to cut.
She probably cut a lot.
I've been filming for 20 minutes.
So today we are using bison meat,
which, guys, I don't need to tell you the facts.
But bison meat is actually a lot
better for you than ground beef.
I'm a big bison advocate, especially
since we live in North America,
where the bison are naturally from.
Where are cows from?
Nobody knows.
So now that we've got this dry flour thing happening,
we're going to cook it in sections
until it's cooked enough for humans to eat.
You can't see it but I'm cooking just so much meat.
Oh wow, that looks really beautiful.
Chopped onion, carrot, celery, garlic to pot.
We're not gonna...
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
I don't get it.
The thing about drinking vodka
is that it just looks and tastes bad.
I know what you're thinking: "Hanna, why wouldn't you
just peel the carrots beforehand?"
And I know what I'm thinking: "You're right."
The good news about a measuring cup is that
you can use it in so many different ways
as a vessel, as a container, as
a place to put peeled carrots things.
That is great, measuring cups do a lot for everybody.
Measuring cups, 2020.
(Gong)
(chopping)
Oh god, nobody really like carrots.
♪ Carrot on my wayward son. ♪
Oh my god, the ingredients list is so long.
Onions, celery, garlic, Boom-Ba-Ba-Boom-Bee.
Okay so, because we don't hate ourselves
instead of buying so much celery
that we'll never use again, we just bought celery
in this convenient plastic thing.
Guys, have you heard about plastics? They're amazing.
Surely, it won't get out of hand.
Okay, great, next...
(pained grunts)
(satisfied humming)
Guys, this is what I call a "meat n' greet" am I right?
(gong)
I don't know if you know this but I...
(phone rings)
That's my phone. Quiet on the set, this guy.
(Choir singing)
Oh, you know what would be great?
You should dice the onion, good suggestion.
- Aw...
- Wow, another perfect dicing job by me.
Okay, next step...
Onions, celery, garlic to pot,
cover and cook until vegetables soften.
(irritated sounds)
Okay guys, so the recipe that I'm following
actually calls for us to be cooking this bison in a pot.
Now obviously I have wildly departed from that,
but I will cook the vegetables in a pot.
Because, you know what?
It's never too late for you to course correct.
A decision you embarked on might not
ultimately be the one you wanna go to.
That's okay, guess what guys?
In the end, The Sun envelops the Earth.
(laughter)
Also garlic is in this.
Many tasty.
So traditionally, a shepherd's pie
you're making mashed potatoes from scratch
Because you're like "Wow, I'm so bored and we're starving
and potatoes are everywhere",
but today, we are able to get potatoes out of a box.
So, I'm gonna make some instant mashed potatoes
very rapidly right now. Here we go.
(flat laughter)
Yes, there it is, pow. Cooking sure involves
a lot of different things, all at once.
What a joy and a relief!
Two tablespoons of margarine.
Heat up water, margarine and salt
to boiling in a saucepan. Oh my god.
Have I told you guys how much I like milk?
Potato flakes, yay!
Let me love you!
Ooh, so flaky.
Then, what's the next step? Oh, don't do all that at once.
Cool. Fun way to order everything, recipe.
Fun new fact.
Oh man, this is really why they say
"read the recipe ahead of time."
Wow, they win.
This is how we should structure recipes.
The order of events should be sequential.
Why have a list of ingredients?
Perhaps because you're ordering in bulk.
Okay fine, I get it, I don't cook a lot.
Doesn't mean I don't wanna try to cook sometimes.
There should be a cooking series for people
that are just trying with very low expectations.
Oh god, I already used this to do this
and now I'm just gonna put it in the meat.
(nervous laughter)
Please don't ruin it.
All this for 12 minutes of content.
So, to update you from the handycam, here we go baby.
Right now, we have the meat and the veggies
hanging out, chilling, I'll talk to you later.
Oh my god, what's going on over here?
We got the mashed potato city.
That's just butter, just cold, cold butter.
What's the chicken broth for?
Don't you hate when a recipe just won't give up?
You know what the best thing about
instant mashed potatoes is?
Is that they're rooting for you, dude.
They want to work out.
Mm, at this point I'm so hungry,
Also, a little drunk...
- [Editor] That eating mashed potatoes is all you want?
- This mashed potato stuff is great.
Here's a little fun fact, I'm holding parmesan.
Mix your parmesan in with your
mashed potatoes, because you love yourself.
(satisfied hum)
So, in the world of shepherd's pie,
you put them in a large cooking dish casserole thing
and then you cook it for 30-40 minutes.
And I'm like, "Wow, I so much don't
have that kinda time, nor desire."
instead, that's why I'm using this,
so I can make a bunch of mini pies. Right?
Because, what is pie day all about?
I'll tell you. Math?
(aerosol spray)
So, I'm gonna fill all these little pockets with meat.
(Sped up speech)
Yum.
Okay, now that you have your delicious...
Not cupcakes, mini pies.
And I'm gonna stick them in the oven
at 400 degrees, for 20-ish minutes.
"Why?" You may ask. I don't know.
Let's find out how it went. Yeah!
Oh! It came in and out of the oven!
Ooh! this is just a towel!
Oh my god, is this some thyme and some sage?
Ooh, hello new friend, let's see how you taste.
Ooh, too hot to touch! I'm in pain.
Oh my god, that's like a tiny cupcake except way better.
(gasp)
My god guys, it came out so perfectly.
(sigh)
Oh my god.
Oh my god, it's gonna look so "high society"
I think I'm choking myself with my own anticipation.
(deep breath)
(pop)
boop-boop.
Ready? This is how you go from sass to class
♪ A-Dee-Dee-Dee-Dee-Dee ♪
if you do this, your guest will hate you.
And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen.
This is your shepherd's pie mini pie.
Wow. Well, at least we go that one picture, am I right?
Here is something that you can eat
that is bite sized, not really pocket sized.
Definitely don't put it in your pocket,
You would ruin your pants.
Happy pie day everybody! If you have any sense of
why 3.14 is a valuable number to us mathematically
please inform me in the comments below,
(dog barks)
Because I would love to know.
He knows! Dogs know everything.
I will never speak ill of our lord and master, cats.
Okay, here we go. Bite, bite bite.
Oh thank god, most of this is parmesan. Mm.
(whip cracks)
(pleased hums)
You're welcome.
Oh my god! This is fantastic.
Would it have been better with
any of the other ingredients? Yes, absolutely yes.
I actually have an entire full bottle of red wine here
and I definitely should have added that.
Mm. Thank god for parmesan, because this game is parmes-on
And also, if you actually wanna see the recipe
I was heading towards, go ahead and
click the link in the description below.
It called for some red wine, which I did not add
as well as a myriad of other ingredients,
which I also did not add.
But that is all to say that...
(Baby crying)
There's a baby in the house, I'll be quiet.
Anyway guys, it was very tasty,
I hope you make it too. Happy Pie Day, everybody!
(blows kiss)
(Jazzy music)