you're so vain you probably think this
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hi my name is father Mike Schmitz and
this is ascension presents oh you know
that song uh you're so vain it's from a
long time ago
but there's a line in it you're saying
you probably think this song is about
you and describes how this guy walks
into the room and he thinks everyone's
looking at him or she's like you think
that everyone's looking at you and
everyone is looking at you basically
vanity yeah I'll talk to a lot of people
who will say something like well vanity
is not really something that I wrestle
with vanity is not really a part of my
life I mean it's not like I think I'm
the best at whatever or that and that's
not that I think I'm so beautiful or so
handsome or so athletic or so like oh
okay that's an interesting thing because
yes we associate that kind of mentality
or like I'm not gonna go get liposuction
or I'm not gonna get like plastic
surgery just to make myself look better
so I'm not very vain or sometimes I even
go out without even doing my hair I'm
not very vain you know that kind of idea
that's one aspect of vanity that is just
the symptom of the the root of what
vanity is usual vanity is a vanity is
could be just a lot defined or described
as an inordinate preoccupation with what
other people think very very simply now
I'm gonna break that down a little bit
welcomewelcome because it's not just
caring about what other people think
that's actually a decent thing it's an
it's important to be able to be
sensitive to how you're being perceived
how you're coming across how you
communicate yourself to be aware of what
other people think and to actually even
care about what other people think is
not a bad thing they actually can be a
very good thing especially for trying to
love people to be okay I'm gonna
struggle I have an arrest against vanity
means I'm no longer in a care what other
people think no actually that's an
overcorrection the first word is
inordinate right so an imbalance two
preoccupation with what other people are
thinking about you it doesn't just mean
don't care what other people think
because you have to because we're
relationship with each other and because
we're called to love them and how can we
love them unless we care about them and
care about what they think this way you
can see how vanity could be like Oh
thinking more of ourselves flashing our
peacock feathers kind of a situation and
wanting to be noticed but it also can be
not wanting to be noticed it can it can
be like the puffing up your chest or
whatever the thing people do you know to
kind of be you know out there to be
noticed because I want people to look at
me it also can be the I shrink back and
want anyone to look at me it can't be
the person who gets you know is the
loudest person on the bus a lot of is
person in the room who was like kind of
the COA they're like the center of
attention and also can be the person who
refuses to actually share what they
think the person who refuses to share
their opinion because both that like
person who's like you know look at me
and the person who's like don't look at
me that comes from the same wound and
that same wound is I care an inordinate
amount about what people think it drives
my desire for attention or it drives my
desire to not be seen you know it
sometimes can feel weird for us to to
note that someone who considers
themselves unattractive can still be
vain let's look let's look at this
there's a little more closely a lot of
times I find that one of the main
reasons why people will not Evangelos
one of the main reasons why people will
not actually share what they believe
about Jesus or what they believe about
the truth about God in their lives and
and and the reality is not necessarily
because like I don't know what to say
not necessarily because that no one
wanted to know a lot of times it's I
don't want to share this because I'm
overly concerned or enormity concerned
with what other people think of me if I
share this what will they think if I
offer this what if I say it the wrong
way and they think less of me if I if I
if I go there what will they think I
think maybe the number one enemy to the
evangelists the number one enemy to the
from your person who preaches all the
time to your average everyday Catholic
who rarely preaches I think the number
one enemy is vanity because think about
how often how many times being overly
concerned with that someone else thinks
has been the reason why you didn't share
your faith I know it's happened to me
how many times I can't even tell you to
be overly inordinately preoccupied with
what they think caution
it is not super helpful to assign this
particular wound of vanity to someone
that is working out it's not necessarily
appropriate to assign the wound of
vanity to someone who cares about their
appearance or is the CEO a right the
center of attention sometimes that is a
person who would like no I for example
here's like a hair thing I don't know
someone always has their hair done right
the hair did good he's like well yeah
they're so vain they have to have their
hair nice now they can do this they
could do like I take care of my hair and
then I go like it could be like this I
don't even give it a second thought I
don't even give it a third thought of
what someone else might be thinking
about how I look I took care of what I
need to take care of to be presentable
and then I'd leave and don't even think
about it again or someone who's always
in the gym you're like wow they're
really preoccupied with other people are
thinking maybe that maybe they are but
also could be like now they just really
like exercising because they like how it
makes them feel or whatever the thing is
there's always a danger that's one of
the reasons why Jesus said do not judge
the heart because we don't know the
heart we don't know the motive behind it
but we do know our heart or hopefully
hopefully we know our own heart and in
that case I get to look at myself and
say oh I did that because I thought it
would be I thought people would think
well of me oh I didn't do that because I
thought people would think poorly of me
you could share your faith because
you're like oh people are gonna love
this or you could refuse to refrain from
sharing your faith because it's like
people are gonna hate this
but what if there was a different way
where I cared about what other people
think because people matter but I didn't
inordinately care about what other
people think how do you do that I'll
give you one tactic to move forward I
care about what God thinks like that
that he's the one that I know is always
watching he's always attentive to me
he's always attentive to my my actions
what I'm what I'm giving my attention to
my words
and so it's like okay God if I guess I
do this this this honor you I want you
to see this god I'm gonna refrain from
doing that because I don't want you to
see this guy I don't want to be the kind
of person
does this thing God to be more concerned
with what God thinks then what other
people think because I do not believe we
could ever be inordinately preoccupied
with what God thinks so today here
examination conscience is to ask the
question Wow do I say things because I
really care too much about what other
people think do I do things because I
care too much but what other people
think
do I not say some things or not do some
things that I know I should be doing I
know I should be saying but I'm held
back because of vanity because I care
too much in an inordinate way about what
other people think and then say God help
me to care about what you think how many
care about you more than anyone else
anyways I hope that was helpful um yeah
I think it's really good and convicting
to know that what lies at the root of
vanity is not thinking great about
yourself not thinking poorly about
yourself but just ignorantly thinking
too much about yourself sound like that
right brawl is here - since present my
name's father Mike god bless have an
awesome day
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