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- [Teacher] Hey there Psych2Goers,
and welcome back to another video.
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We all have different ways
of dealing with stressful circumstances.
Maybe you like to go to the gym and workout,
or maybe you like to turn the music up in your car
and sing along to the radio, when you're stressed out.
Either way, these two types of coping mechanisms are good
and healthy, since they aren't harmful to you or others.
But there are some unhealthy coping mechanisms
that you might have due to stress,
that can be harmful to you and or other people.
With that said, here are five common
unhealthy coping mechanisms that you shouldn't ignore.
Number one, forced positivity.
I'm sure you've heard the term, good vibes only.
This statement and its accompanying sentiments,
have become part of our societal culture.
Of course, there's nothing wrong
with having a positive mindset.
Positivity can be a pretty powerful tool
when you wanna manifest that in your life.
However, the notion of only positive vibes,
have been taken to the extreme.
Toxic positivity.
Toxic positivity does not come
from a place of genuine happiness,
it comes from a place of denial,
invalidation or minimization.
It's an attempt to display a positive disposition
at all times, even when you're not in the best of moods.
It's usually so excessive,
that the toxic positivity phrases are obvious.
Some examples of toxic positivity are,
"Don't think about it, be positive.
Everything will work out in the end.
If I can do it, so can you."
Or, "It could be worse."
When you force yourself to be positive at all times,
you're barring and repressing your emotions,
which can lead to doubt, shame,
and relational problems with others.
Sometimes life just sucks,
and no amount of positivity can fix it.
It's all right to be angry, jealous,
annoyed or deeply upset about things.
The good and the bad emotions are all part of being human.
Number two, isolating yourself.
For now, being socially distant is our safest option.
But there're other ways you might be isolating yourself
without realizing it.
Socially isolating yourself
simply because you don't like the people who are around you,
is not a healthy habit.
This can make it harder for you to relate to others overall,
when you do something like this.
As a species, we are social creatures
and we crave and need proper connection with other people.
You can learn a lot from the people around you.
When you connect with others in a healthy manner
through supportive conversations and good healthy talks,
you're allowing yourself to grow emotionally and mentally.
Fostering your mental resilience can be helpful
when times of stress do arise.
If you feel anxious in social situations,
try going to an event with someone you know,
or reach out to a professional therapist,
who can teach you techniques to reduce the stress you feel
caused by social situations.
Number three, fatalism.
When somebody bad happens,
our brains immediately embellish the event,
that makes it seem like it's the worst possible thing
to have ever happened to you.
It's a mental trait that has kept humans alive
for millions of years,
so the same mistakes won't be repeated in need of survival.
However, in our modern day society,
it functions as a self-defense mechanism,
you prepare for the worst just in case.
But, this behavior might be causing you more stress
than necessary.
High levels of stress can lead to severe
mental and physical health problems,
like depression and even heart disease.
A tool to help overcome this need to catastrophize would be,
to allow yourself to think of the five top worst outcomes.
And then, ask yourself,
how likely they are to actually happen.
If you feel like a bad outcome is truly likely,
then plan for that one outcome,
create a plan that is flexible
and doable in case it needs to change.
This will give you a better sense of security going forward,
and create less stress in your life.
Number four, repressing your feelings.
Are you you repressing your feelings
because you think that no one cares?
Or that it's a waste of time?
Often, this behavior is a type of self-defense mechanism,
that activates when you believe that you no longer
have control over a certain situation.
Whether you choose to overreact or under react,
you are not giving your emotions a chance to be aired out.
While there should be a degree
of emotional self-control in place,
we should remember to be genuine with how we're feeling
and express it calmly and reasonably,
in a way that does not harm others.
If you are more likely to overreact
when something goes wrong, notice any physiological changes.
Usually your body is a good indicator
of how you're actually feeling.
Taking a moment to meditate and ground yourself
in your body, can help you minimize stress
and reduce emotional outbursts.
There're other ways to shake out repressed emotions,
such as yelling into a pillow, dancing or working out.
Number five, romanticizing the past.
The past can hold a certain appeal,
when we put our nostalgic goggles on,
especially when the present looks dim and not as promising.
Unfortunately, we can't resurrect the past.
Things happened and chances are, they did not happen
exactly as you imagined they would.
Living in a nostalgic daydream of what could have been,
can rob you of opportunities that you need
to be taking advantage of in your current present.
If you find yourself taking frequent trips down memory lane,
figure out what specifically appeals to you
about those memories, and try to recreate them
in the present.
The present can sometimes be dim and gray,
but your perspective depends on how you choose to handle it.
So, which of these coping mechanisms did you relate to most?
How do you healthily or unhealthily
cope with stressful circumstances?
Share your experiences with us in the comments below.
Please, like and share this video if it helped you,
and you think it could help someone else too.
The studies and references used are listed
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