Today, I'm going to talk about how to unlock the secret to success and
really just stop screwing yourself.
That's what we're going to be talking about today.
I'm Rebecca Zung.
On this channel, I talk about narcissists and all sorts of things.
I'm an attorney and if you want to subscribe to this channel,
subscribe to this channel, hit that notification bell,
because what I talk about here is how to unscrew yourself,
in a lot of different ways,
because I want you to become powerful,
not just against narcissists,
but in always, and I do that
because I've had to deal with narcissists,
I've had to deal with them in a lot of different ways,
I had to deal with bullies myself as a kid and
I talked about that in various videos and
my own story and
I rose to become one of the most powerful lawyers,
but, that was not an easy journey and
I really want you to know that in my personal life,
I really learned that it really comes down to a series of choices and
there's so much power in the power of a decision,
the power of a decision and
I call it the deciding factor.
There is really a redemptive power that a choice has,
just the decision has,
there's something in our brain called the reticular activating system (RAS),
it's almost like a filter in your brain and
there's certain things that get through all the time and
it kind of works to protect us in a certain way,
but it also kind of hurts us in a certain way,
so certain things that get through are like your name and
threats to our safety, our partner wants sex, or something like that,
but there are a lot of things that don't get through,
so you have to start to be aware of what it is you're going to focus on,
but most of the time, the only things that get through
are like bad memories, old things,
like, when we're just focusing on old stuff,
old stuff, old stuff, all the time and
so like 90-something percent of the thoughts that we have today,
are the same thoughts that we had yesterday,
or the same thoughts that we had before and
we think that what we're thinking is reality,
but it's really just the same things
we’re just playing and playing again and again and
really, our brain is just a CPU
that's just been like programmed, programmed, programmed and
we think that we’re just like this fixed thing and
honestly, it's just not, you can literally reprogram your brain,
you can decide to literally be a different thing,
it's just your brain remembering,
your likes, your dislikes and you're this, you're that and
you're a certain way and it's just not that way,
it's just literally your brain remembering most of the time.
So, you can start by just being aware of your thoughts,
you can say like, “Oh, I'm not likeable”,
or “I'm shy” or “I'm this, I’m that”
but really, a lot of times,
it's just that you have been at the effect of something for so long,
that you don't realize that you can actually be the cause,
that you can actually choose to be given by the creation of your life,
that you can actually choose to create and
then, once you do that,
you can choose how it's going to go and
what it is that you want and what it's going to look like.
You just decide, the universe is going to line up
to make that happen for you.
It just does.
It starts by being aware of the thoughts in your head and
I have seen this over and over and over show up in my life.
For example, I had a situation when my youngest daughter was little and
I went to go write out the check for her for summer camp,
every year summer camp was like this big drag
to try to figure out how we were going to pay for it.
It’s was like Rob Peter to pay Paul,
to figure out how we're going to pay for summer camp.
It was like we were just making it to
pay the bills for the rest of the year,
but then it would come to like,
how are we going to pay for this extra amount of money,
but we needed to pay for it because,
we needed childcare during the summer and I was already,
practicing law at that point and so was my husband,
but we had three older kids who were already in college and
my husband and I both had student loans and
we were like juggling all this money that was going out the door and
I just remember thinking to myself, I just made a decision,
by next summer, I don't know how it's going to happen,
but by next summer,
I'm not struggling to pay summer camp, period.
It is not going to be a struggle,
somehow, we are easily paying for summer camp and we did.
By that next summer,
I had started my own law practice and
money was flowing easily to me at that point and
life was different.
So, you just have to first be aware of the thoughts in your head and
then, start writing things that you're grateful for.
I know it seems crazy,
but when you start writing things you're grateful for,
at least five things, every single morning that you're grateful for,
why do you do that?
Because it puts you in receiving mode.
Watch my interview with Bob Proctor,
by the way, that will literally change your life.
He talks so much about gratitude and
why gratitude is so important in putting you in receiving mode,
So, do that.
Also, please be aware of the people you allow in your space,
be very choosy about the people and
the energy that you allow in your space,
so, so important.
Write out what you want, be very, very specific,
stay focused on it, believe it can happen,
choose that your energy is going to believe it's going to happen.
You have to believe,
you have to know it, you have to feel it,
you have to put your energy behind it,
you have to put your emotion behind it,
you have to know it, because if you don't believe it,
if you don't put your energy behind it,
if you don't put your emotion behind it,
it will not happen.
Like attracts like, it's a law of physics,
it just does and
once you start to feel it, know it, believe it,
live into it as if it's happening.
I always say it's sort of like when you put the GPS in your car and
you start driving toward it,
you know you're getting to your destination,
you feel it, you know it, you live it, you're driving there,
you don't ever like not feel it, know it, live it, believe it,
you don’t ever think, “Oh, I'm not gonna get there”.
No, you just completely do everything you can
as if you're getting there, right?
You’re picturing it and your energy is going there and
everything is as if you're getting there.
That is how it is when you are planning to get somewhere.
So, when you are picturing it and
this is how you very much have to be when negotiating and
especially negotiating with narcissists and so often, especially,
I talk about this in my S.L.A.Y program,
the very first part of the S.L.A.Y program is S and
S stands for strategy and
when you're doing your strategy,
the very first thing you have to do,
is come up with your vision, your goal,
you have to get there and
with your vision, with your goal and
in getting there you have to figure out,
“Okay, how am I going to get there?”
So, many times you're so beat up by the narcissist,
you're just constantly in defensive mode and
you forget to actually have a vision for yourself
on where it is that you actually want to go, create that vision,
where is it that you actually want to go,
what is it that you actually want, and be really specific,
I always say, if you go into a restaurant to order,
you don't just tell the server you want food, you’re specific, right?
You tell them you want the salad,
you don't want the onions, you want the dressing on the side,
you're really, really specific.
You have to be like that
when you are placing your order to the universe as well.
So, that's how you will stop holding yourself back,
that is how you will unlock the secret to success and
that is how you will get what you want and
I send you all so much love, so much energy and joy,
especially in getting away from narcissists.
If you are getting ready to negotiate,
make sure you grab my free “Crush my negotiation” prep worksheet
at winmynegotiation.com.
Make sure you subscribe to this channel and
hit that notification bell.
If you need more support,
join my free private Facebook group
at “Narcissist Negotiators with Rebecca Zung”.
If you like this video, give it a like, give it a share,
drop me that comment,
tell me that you believe
or what it is that you're trying to manifest,
I would love to know and thanks so much for stopping by.
I send you all love, joy, and peace and remember to slay.
Remember today is a great day to start negotiating your best life.
I will definitely see you in the next video.