Using her versatile tail, the Texas Land squirrel
calls out to the natural enemy of the octopus.
There she blows, y'all!
The whale.
Sick 'em, Pearl! Sorry, Squidward!
[grunting]
[Squidward] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
[grunting]
Ooh! Oh!
[crying, screaming]
[crying]
My moment, to triumph!
Wha.. What the...? Oh, gross.
I command you to stop drooling on me.
Goo.
Put me down.
Ow! Stop it! I'm an adult!
Moron! I mean, SpongeBob!
I can't believe Old Man Krabs has held on to all this stuff.
Ooh. Kazoos. Why, I had a kazoo when I was a child.
Everybody loved it.
[screaming]
My ears!
[screaming]
Alright, that's it!
- Uh, eh, uh-oh. - Uh-oh.
What? What's wrong?
Huh?
Hello.
[groaning]
You got something on your head.
Ow!
[groaning]
And stay out!
Oh, but it's muddy out here.
And it's... cold.
And the sky's crying.
Here ya go.
[shivering]
[groaning]
Hello,friendly neighborhood paperboy,
what can I do for you today?
I'm here about the money, Mr. Star.
Money? [laughing]
Oh, I don't need any money, but thanks for asking.
Wait, no. [groaning]
No, you big pinhead. You owe me newspaper money.
Huh?
Hmm.
♪ In the shower ♪
♪ Ta ta ta ta ta ta ♪
I walked over three blocks!
[screaming]
[groaning]
I'll be there, you deadbeat!
We should open our own restaurant
and stop lining Old Man K's pockets.
No, thanks. I'm just doing this
until my clarinet career takes off.
What if it never does?
Don't you want to have something to fall back on?
Yeah, ha, I could lose my beautiful flowing hair, too.
But I'm not buying a wig yet.
Well, while you go wig shopping, I'm going to go talk
to Mr. Krabs.
Good morning, not SpongeBob.
[groaning]
Fry Patty Cooking Machine.
[gasping]
And hiding behind it, who do we see?
None other than Squidward and his bad face acne.
- Hey. - What is this contraption
you pulled into me place?
A miracle. A marvel.
It will cook Krabby Patties at a populous pace.
But how are the patties? I mean, how do they taste?
I'll let you try one. Shove this in your face.
Have to admit that patty was yummy,
so it sits like a rock when it lands in me tummy.
But I've got me a fry cook and he's always on time.
Ah, but this gizmo is faster and you won't pay it a dime.
Spare change? Spare change, ma'am?
Squidward? Squidward, is that you?
Uh, I- uh.
It's me, SpongeBob. We used to work together.
SpongeBob?
There you go. So, where you living these days?
Squidward Tentacles?
- Yes? - Sign here, please.
Uh, nowhere.
Great. And what have you been doing with yourself?
No, wait, let me guess!
Hmm. I see you've been working on that mustache.
The tattered clothes. The awful smell.
You're a football player!
- No. - A space man?
No.
A football playing king in space?
Don't you get it?! I'm a loser.
I've lost my job, my home, everything.
[gasping] Even your paintings?
Nobody would take them, so I had to eat them.
[crying]
[gasping]
I... I... I can't believe it.
- SpongeBob? - Yeah?
How does it look?
Great Neptune.
Come on, spit it out, I can take it.
Time for your medicine, Mr., Mr., Mr... Handsome.
What did she call me?
Handsome, but she spelled it wrong.
Quick, hand me that mirror.
What the...? Wait a second. That nurse was right.
I am handsome.
Eh, Squidward, you're not handsome.
You're a hunk!
Sponge... hang on a second.
Let me...
[groaning]
Yikes. Squidward, you're even more handsome now.
And the crowd is in a frenzy.
Well, SpongeBob, it was you who got me into this mess,
and now you have to get me out again.
I know, Squidward.
I'll think of something. Uh! I just need... Uh!
I just... Uh!
[music playing]
[slow motion] Got me into...
Squidward! Look out for that falling shoe!
[slow motion] Huh?
[panting]
[screaming]
[music playing]
Squidward?
[music playing]
SpongeBob?
[grunting]
My perfect dream body.
Come on, come on, hurry up.
Don't worry. I just need to get the key out.
Mmm mmm mmm.
Give me that, you incompetent fool!
Yes, the Krabby Patty formula's mine.
Uh, I mean, we'll have a great time.
Now, where does Krabs keep that formula?
Whoo! Let's rock!
- Yeah! - We're gonna be stars!
Alright, Squidward, are you ready?!
I'm ready.
Paranormal?
The only thing paranormal around here
is how fast I'm going to make you two disappear!
Don't blame me.
Blame the market.
[bell ringing]
W-Where am I?
I felt like I was in some sort of a horrible trance.
You want to know what happened?
[both]Okay.
You once again managed to single-handedly annihilate
what might be the one and only chance I may ever get
to sew just one tiny seed of creative hope
into the culturally barren wasteland
that each and every one of us is forced to call home.
Has it been 50 years already?
Yes, I knew I'd still be hot.
Secret recipe, where are you? Ah ha!
Hello, future!
[laughing]
Yes. [laughing]
Huh? What the? Where's my museum?
The future is the same as my old pathetic life.
Forget this. I'm waiting another 50 years.
Hey, Squidward,
I bet Old Man Krabs is gonna break any day.
Eh, Squidward? Eh, Squidward? Eh, Squidward? Eh, Squidward?
Eh, Squidward? Eh, Squidward?