-Good evening. I'm Seth Meyers.
"This is "Late Night."
We hope you're all doing well
and, now, if you don't mind,
we're going to get to the news.
Senate Democrats this week
introduced a new bill proposing
a so-called billionaires income tax,
while Senate Republicans introduced a new bill proposing
you can claim your yacht as a dependent.
[ Laughter ]
In a recent interview, singer Olivia Rodrigo said that,
when she went to the White House earlier this year,
President Biden gave her a pair of sunglasses, M&M's,
and a shoehorn with the president seal,
which is definitely just some stuff
that was on his desk when she showed up.
[ Laughter ]
[ As Biden ] You, uh, you wear shoes, right?
[ Laughter ]
The House voted today
on the Protect Older Job Applicants Act of 2021,
I assume, to get ready for the 2024 election.
[ Laughter and applause ]
[ Fresh laughter ]
President Biden today unveiled a revised framework
for his domestic spending plan, which includes more
than $555 billion for clean energy.
Even Joe Manchin says he supports that $400 billion.
He only hopes that they'll find a responsible way to use
that $310 billion.
[ Laughter ] After all, $120 billion
is a lot of money and nobody wants to waste
that $42 billion.
[ Laughter ] He then added, "Hey,
how about zero?"
[ Laughter ]
President Biden met today with House Democrats
to discuss his healthcare spending proposal
on the infrastructure bill, which is now down
to a 30-day trial for WebMD+
and they're going to paint some tunnels on a rock,
like Wile E. Coyote.
[ Laughter ]
With more and more policies being cut
from President Biden's Build Back better spending bill,
including guaranteed paid leave, tax hikes on the wealthy,
and several other policies that the president promised,
many are wonder what's left in the bill,
so we thought we'd give you a quick rundown
of what's actually left in Build Back Better.
[ Jaunty tune plays ]
This song again?
[ Laughter ]
[ Laughter and cheering ]
[ Laughter ]
[ Laughter ] And, finally...
This has been "What Actually Is Left in Build Back Better."
[ Cheering, whistling, and applause ]
Ahead of President Biden's meeting with Pope Francis,
White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki said yesterday
that she does not expect the two to discuss abortion.
Wow!
So they're keeping it.
[ Laughter ]
[ Mouths "Wow!" ]
According to a new survey, 19% of Americans said they rely
on their body's internal clock
to wake them up at a certain time.
Oh, yeah, there's a term for those people.
What is it again?
Oh, yeah, late.
[ Laughter ]
Apple released an iPhone update this week
that allows users to add their coronavirus vaccine card
to the Wallet app and guess what.
It doesn't fit there, either.
[ Laughter ]
And, finally, five men in New York
were charged yesterday
with operating a narcotics ring
that allegedly smuggled
millions of dollars' worth of cocaine hidden
in children's lunchboxes.
Still healthier than Lunchables.
[ Laughter ] And that was the monologue, everybody.