• From sexist life coaches teaching you how to seduce women to using a Walkman as
a viable weapon against a cephalopod we look at 15 amazing scenes inexplicably cut from
famous movies 15 – Who Framed Roger Rabbit – Pig’s
head, • Our favourite film for turning to things
that shouldn’t be in a children’s movie makes it here again with this deleted scene.
• It starts with the weasels torturing Eddie and throwing him out of toon town wearing
an animated pigs head. Causing him to have to take a turpentine shower to dissolve the
offending head gear which then turns to us seeing a pig’s face dissolving in the bath
before nothing being left but eyeballs in the drain.
• The only way this could have been more traumatising for pig lovers than if it was
actually porky pig’s head that was being dissolved here. Still considering the film
this should have stayed in. 14 – Magnolia – More TJ,
• That’s right there was even more of Tom Cruise’s most disturbing role put to
screen that was left out of the final cut. • In the film Cruise plays TJ a sexist sort
of motivational speaker who tells men to make women respect the cock. The character is played
with an even mix of intensity and ridiculousness which makes a scene where he explains that
you need a sob story seduce women. • Not that we are saying TJ is a good thing
but he’s the most interesting part of Magnolia and his onstage ego trip is hilarious to watch.
13 – X-men: First Class – Drag-neto, • Oh yeah here we come to some sexy time
scenes with the sexiest thing ever done for an X-Men film and it’s putting Jennifer
Laurence in blue latex. • That’s right it’s putting Michael
Fassbender in a dress. But what’s the reason for Magneto’s sudden desire to become a
crossdresser? Well it turns out it’s a delusion that Charles puts into people’s head because
he’s a cheeky bastard. • Surely this is the real reason the two
became enemies, Then again maybe Charles was picking up on some of Magneto’s repressed
feelings. 12 – Return of the Jedi – Luke build his
lightsaber, • Ever wondered how Luke got that sick green
lightsabre in between Empire and Jedi? Well millions of Star Wars fans this scene has
the answer. • And it’s pretty anticlimactic, Luke
just built in a cave on Tatooine before he went to face Jabba the Hutt. Still this scene
helps build Luke as the bad ass Jedi he has become now constructing the weapon that he
could barely use against a floating ball. • Never thought I’d see the day when I’d
want Lucas to actually put something into the original trilogy.
11 – Superman returns - Krypton, • Poor Brandon Routh, being a dead ringer
for Christopher Reeve and stuck in a film less enjoyable than Superman III but this
cut scene would have helped. • Showing where exactly Supes had been for
x amount of years, we see him exploring an exploded dead krypton in a sequence that seems
more at home in a sci-fi horror film than Superman.
• Full of mood and tension the scene is more immersive and effective than anything
left in the final cut leaving us scratching our heads over why this was cut but the shot
of Luther’s wig collection stays in. 10 – The Terminator – Cyberdyne Reveal,
• Okay so Terminator is full of grandfather paradoxes and this scene would have given
us the absolute on how such an advanced AI was born.
• See turns out that factory where the T-800 gets turned into a pancake wasn’t just any
ordinary robotics factory, it was a Cyberdyne factory. Shock and horror the terminators
created themselves and if they had have succeeded in killing Sarah Connor they would have never
been created. • It really makes you think. Though this
was pretty explained also in Terminator 2 it would have really capped off the fatalistic
undertones in the originally film perfectly and showing that Skynet sucks at time travel.
9 – Natural Born Killers - Pencil, • This ultra-violent film from the messed
up minds of Oliver Stone and Quentin Tarantino featured a fair amount of cuts.
• The one that probably should have stayed was seeing Ashley Judd get stabbed in the
heart by Woody Harrelson with a god-damn pencil. In the middle of a court room too. Considering
how crazy the rest of the film is there is no reason for that to be left on the cutting
room floor. • And what is it with movies and thinking
pencils are great stabbing weapons? Last I remember my 2b used to snap with a light breeze.
8 – Goonies – Giant Octopus, • Who doesn’t love The Goonies for its
1980’s cheese that most definitely could have used a very fake looking giant octopus
attack. • The scene is pretty short and the giant
creature is somehow defeated by a Walkman but who cares, this should have stayed in
so we didn’t all have to wonder what the hell Data was talking about at the end when
he tells the reporters that the octopus was “scary”.
• But seriously do octopi have an allergy to walkmans that I’m just not aware of?
I need this question answered! 7 – Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me – The
Epilogue, • End your TV show on a cliff-hanger and
then not address it at all in the follow up movie? Jeez no wonder people were disappointed.
• But had this scene stayed in it might have tantalised fans enough to get them to
actually go see the film. Instead the omission makes it seem like Lynch had no intention
of giving fans any resolution. • There’s a reason they made a big deal
when these deleted scenes were finally released to the public recently, Lynch certainly knows
how to keep the suspense going over a 25 year old cliff-hanger!
6 – Alien – Egg Transformation, • So despite Alien being terrifying we never
see what the creature was intending to do with the crew. Well this deleted scene tells
you. • Turns out the original idea for the Xenomorph
life cycle included turning people into the very eggs that created facehuggers. The cut
scene shows Ripley finding the crew mid transformation where she does the only sane thing and burns
them. • Forget all that Queen bullshit this is
the real terrifying way to be killed by an unknown death machine, helping them to give
birth to the next wave of outer space killers. 5 – Lethal Weapon – Sniper Takedown
• Oh the days when Mel Gibson was a bad ass and could fight road gangs and be a crazy
buddy cop character. • This gem of a scene shows old Melly taking
down an entrenched sniper by essentially walking through the line of fire and empting a whole
clip into him. Riggs really is a psycho at this point.
• But hey at least this was restored for the director’s cut meaning you can get your
fill of the days when you could enjoy watching Mel Gibson before all that terrible incident…Oh
why did you make ‘What Women Want’ Mel? 4 – Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
– Saruman’s Death, • So remember that bad guy who’s been
doing all the stuff for two films and raising an army well just forget about showing what
happens to him and walk right along. • That’s how the theatrical cut treats
poor Saruman, not showing the confrontation that involves him being stabbed in the back
and falling off his tower to then be impaled at the bottom.
• Talk about having a bad day, stabbed, impaled and cut from the film. Someone must
have really had it out for Christopher Lee. 3 – In Bruges – Samurai Timelord,
• Want to see the 11th Doctor chop a policeman’s head off with a sword while donning an awesome
70s haircut? Well fuck you, you can’t. • At least that’s what whoever edited
the film thought and decided to drop this fantastically radicicolous bit of violence
from the final film. Robbing us of seeing just how crazy the character is.
• Then again maybe it was at Matt Smiths request that he shouldn’t be in the film
because he wouldn’t be able to make the catchphrase “swords are cool” work.
2 – Kill Bill Vol.2 – Bill’s Skills, • Remember how Kill Bill Vol. 1 was full
of action and Vol.2 featured a fuck tonne of talking and no sword decapitations? Well
this scene would have fixed some of your complaints. • In this cut material we see Bill and the
Bride walking though some streets when Black Dynamite shows up to confront Bill for killing
his master. The ensuing battle is cheesy and blood-filled in the best kind of way.
• This builds Bill up as even more of a badass than anything that is in the finished
film leaving you incredibly angry that Tarantino decided to leave it on the editing room floor.
Much like the way Bill leaves corpses on the ground.
1 – Terminator 2 – Every Cut, • Yep everything that was cut from this
film is pure that never should been taken out especially when it involves Robert Patrick.
• Scenes left out of the original cut had Arnold’s head being cut open to get at his
CPU and turn off a switch that stopped him learning and the T-1000 feeling up things
in John’s room to help him track the future resistance leader. Well maybe not everything,
that happy future scene should be burned. • Most of these trims and cuts have been
restored in the 80-thousand director’s cuts Cameron has put out. But now we know why Arnold
was able to learn his ‘Hasta La Vista Baby’ catchphrase.