Jennifer Brick: You don't want to care what other
people think about you. But you do. So the real
question is, how can you keep what other people
think of you from getting in your way, that is
exactly what I'm answering in today's video. If
that sounds good to you tap that like button and
let's jump straight into it. First, you need to
know that caring what other people think about you
at work and in life is totally natural. As human
beings were really hard wired to want to be part
of the tribe. Back when we were cave peeps, it was
instrumental to our survival. And even though most
of us don't live in caves any longer, that
evolutionary psychology still exists. It's like a
fun little throwback in your brain. What I'm
really saying here is, if you care what other
people think about you, or work, or you care about
what people think about you in life, you are
completely normal. But that doesn't mean that you
need to settle into what other people think about
you. Because the next thing that you're going to
do when it comes to how people perceive you how
people think about you, is to take into account
perspective. And I'm just going to get straight to
the point on this one, when you're worried about
what someone thinks about you, you need to ask
yourself this tough question. Does their opinion
really matter? Or for that fact? Does their
judgment really matter? Here's the thing as they
say, opinions are like, everyone has one eye when
it comes to what other people think about you, the
thing that you need to take into consideration is
where does this person fit in your life? And does
the opinion that they have about you matter? For
example, if your boss thinks that you're
completely untalented and incompetent at your job,
that's going to be a problem. But if your coworker
who has no influence and no impact in terms of
your career trajectory thinks the same, well, it's
not actually that big of a deal. Sure, it might
cause a little bit of drama, sure, it might cause
a little bit of company drama, but at the end of
the day, it isn't going to hurt your career, no
matter what they think about you. But usually when
you are worried about what other people think
about you, your concern isn't really if it's going
to have an impact on your career, what we're
really looking for is for approval from other
people remember, k people tried this was important
then, and you might be really dependent on
external approval, people telling you that you did
a good job making sure that you're fitting in with
everyone. And this leads me actually directly into
My third tip, which is to stop relying on that
external approval, especially when it comes to
what other people think about you at work isn't
nice when someone thinks you're awesome, and tells
you that they did a good job. Sure it is. But when
that is something that matters to you on a day to
day basis, it is also going to matter to you when
they don't like you. And when they don't think you
did a good job. And there is zero path to not
caring what other people think about your work
when you care when they're saying nice things
about you or thinking nice things about you. And
you just want to filter out the bad things. This
is an all or nothing game. Either you care about
everything or you care about nothing, you become
someone that is cultivating confidence internally.
And this is much steadier, and I highly recommend
it. And one of the key ways that you do that
actually brings me directly into the fourth tip on
how to stop caring what other people think about
you at work, and that is to own your awesomeness.
And I have a feeling that some of you are going to
be smashing the thumbs down and then exiting this
video when I say this, if you feel like you're
misunderstood at work, it is because you are not
managing the impressions that you are making on
other people. If you are someone who is very
ambitious in your career, and you want to climb
the corporate ladder impression management is
crucial and developing your social intelligence is
really important. And in my opinion, this really
starts with understanding your unique awesomeness
quotient, your ua q because if you don't know your
UI, Q, you don't really know what impression to
manage in the first place. And without that you're
not going to have any level of consistency or
influence in terms of what other people actually
think about you. And I actually have a whole
workshop that is free. If you want to dive in and
uncover your ua q i will link it in the comments
down below in case you want to check it out. Of
course, I highly recommend it. Oh, that brings me
into my fifth tip. Okay, if you didn't like the
last tip, you're really not going to like this
one. Because this is probably one of the harshest
truth bombs that I have dropped on this channel.
Are you ready for it? My fifth tip to stop caring
what other people think about you and work. And
that is to know that opinions are mirrors. If what
someone thinks about you at work, or if what
someone thinks about you in life is something that
is bothersome to you, it actually doesn't really
matter unless it's a belief that you have about
yourself. For example, if your coworker thinks
that you're not very good at your job, this isn't
going to matter to you. If you know you're
exceptional at your job and what your coworker
thinks about you is actually really bothering you
because it is an insecurity that you have about
yourself. So when you are worried about what other
people think about you or what you think is a
misconception about you at work, I really want you
to consider is this an insecurity or something
that you're not feeling particularly confident
about because when you And actually identify that
that's going to allow us to start to bridge that
gap and increase your confidence. When you have
that self awareness about what you are not feeling
so awesome about, it's going to allow you to take
steps in order to bridge that gap. And I bet you
can even think about an example where you were not
worried about what someone thought about you at
work, where maybe they didn't even have a great
opinion about your great thought or there was, you
know, some office gossip or whatever it is, and
you were completely on ruffled by the fact that
someone had this because you just knew it was not
true. Like it was so incredibly obvious how wrong
they were. And because you knew they were wrong,
their opinion about you at work did not matter. On
the other hand, if whatever you are worried about
people thinking about you at work, right now, if
you're being really, really honest with yourself,
it is because you have some level of doubt, not
saying that you're walking around thinking that
you're like a big loser failure or anything like
that. There's a fly in here and feel like I'm
having a mike pence moment.
Anyways, it is something that you have even a
little teeny tiny smudge. And if you heal that up,
you are going to care so much less about what
other people think about you at work. And this
brings me to my next tip on how to stop caring
about what other people think about you at work.
And this is especially for those of you that are
in a toxic workplace or have recently left a toxic
workplace. But honestly, it does apply to
everyone. And that is to make sure that you are
cultivating a positive mindset. When you are a
positive person, what people think about you is
going to be positive things because let's just
face it, if you are a ray of sunshine, no one is
going to be able to think anything bad about you.
And you will not have to worry about what other
people think about you at work be someone that
brightens their day uplifts them and helps them be
successful. And my friend, you are not going to
have to worry at all about what other people think
about you at work and even if your default setting
is pessimistic like me developing a positive
attitude is not as hard as it sounds. In fact, I
break down exactly how you can do it in this
video. I want you to go and check that out. It is
not as complicated as it seems. In fact, it's
shockingly easy if this video helps you give less
apps about what other people think about your work
make sure to give it a thumbs up and if you
haven't already, subscribe and become one of my
career besties As always, thank you so much for
watching. I will see you in the next video. Bye
for now.