- Every once in a while I'll eat canned food,
but it's usually like in a dark time of my life.
The Weirdest Canned Food Taste Test
- [Voiceover] Brown bread, raisin flavored!
- You're gonna have to...
- Oh.
- Oh, it's coming.
I loosened it for you.
- Yeah, sure.
- I like it.
- Oh, it's so "raisin-y".
- It doesn't taste like raisins, though.
- I do feel, though, if they would serve this to me
on a plate at a fancy restaurant,
I'd be like "oh, chante, this is amazeur".
- You can can bread.
- I, for one, would rather die by zombies.
- [Voiceover] A sample of rattlesnake meat
in the purest form.
- Aah, no! I don't even want to eat normal rattlesnake,
let alone in a can.
- God, it's awful looking.
- How we go from bread to rattlesnakes?
How did that happen?
- (laughs) This was a very quick escalation.
- That smells pretty damn good.
- Smell it, smell it, smell it.
- No, that's from a snake.
(man laughs)
- [Both] Cheers.
- Aah, I'm sorry, aah!
- I mean, it's more like venison, pork...
- Ew, the spine, it's a spine!
- There's a snake spine in here.
- We work hard, we deserve boneless canned food.
- And especially boneless rattlesnake.
- Like, you could definitely put this in foods
that a chicken would be in or something,
(man laughs)
and you could just pass off and get away with it.
- I hope there's a prize in here
and it's just a little rattle.
- [Voiceover] It's octopus. - [Man] It's octopus, oh!
- Ooh!
- [Both] Ugh!
- Don't waste time nor money in cooking it,
cutting it, or keeping it frozen.
- Oh, it's a tentacle!
- Yeah, tentacle!
- When they get calamari, all the white people are like
"oh, I want the rings, I don't want this stuff
"with the tentacles".
- You would hang out with people that say stuff like that.
- Freshy fishy.
- It's too chewy, it's like it never ends.
Like, I keep chewing it to get it to go away.
- I know, and then the flavor keeps coming out.
- I don't like it.
- I mean, if you're trying to improve your jaw strength--
- [Woman] Yeah, like that. - [Man] This is the best meal.
- It feels like gum.
- Ugh, stop it.
- [Both men] Fried chicken in a can.
- [Woman] Fried "chik'n".
- So you're giving me fried chicken in a can,
and it's not even real fried chicken?
- Ooh, how does it, it does not need to be that thick.
(man laughs)
- There's no reason it needs to be this big.
- It smells like dog food, like one you mix in.
- Oh yeah, it smells like Fancy Feast.
- Hmm.
- It became a liquid so fast.
- We can call it fried chicken, they're vegetarian,
they won't know, they don't know what fried chicken
tastes like 'cause they're vegetarians.
- It makes me feel lonely.
- Are you gonna give us a fake turkey now?
- It's Thanksgiving, you're gonna give us
a fake processed turkey in a can?
Jesus tap dancing Christ.
- [Voiceover] Alligator in Cajun-style gravy.
- We got some Cajun-style "alligata"!
(man laughs)
- That smells delightful.
- It look primordial as shit.
- Kind of smells like Cup O' Noodles
like with Sriracha in them.
- Really Cajun.
- Nice spice.
- If I had to have a choice during the Apocalypse
or whatever this would be it.
- Like, too soft, it's too soft.
- This opened up a whole new world for me
'cause this is not bad.
- I don't think most people have alligator and rattlesnake
canned foods, but, for a lot of people, canned food
is a reality, it's a part of life,
it's something you need eat to survive.
- Mm-hmm.
- The fact that I can sit here in a chair
surrounded by lights and say which ones I,
joke about which ones tasted disgusting to me,
I mean, that's coming from a place of privilege,
and I don't forget for a second how lucky we are.
- Yeah.
- Also, fuck this and I don't want to eat it ever again.
- True.
- How is smoke-flavor an ingredient?
- I don't know, maybe they just have a smoker standing there
at the end going (blows smoke).
- Ew.
- And now you "'ave" fried chicken with smoke "flava".
- So they're French as well?
- I mean, if I had to hire a person to smoke on my food,
I would hire a French person, 'cause at least it'd be sexy.