- [Amanda] Hey, Psych2Goers. Welcome back to our channel.
So you're curious, what kind of traits
most people find attractive.
Everyone's different.
So they may define a strong sense of humor
as an important quality.
While someone else may say trustworthiness
is a key quality they need in a partner.
But there are quite a few common traits
people find attractive in others
despite varying personalities.
So here are six traits people find attractive.
Number one, vulnerability.
How vulnerable are you?
For a relationship to work,
partners need to be vulnerable with each other
and open up about themselves.
Family and marriage therapist, Hal Runkel,
told Business Insider that,
"We like people strong enough to reveal themselves,
without needing us to validate them."
So if you're wondering whether or not
to open up to your partner about your true inner self,
perhaps now's the time to start
being more vulnerable with them about what's on your mind.
Number two, trustworthiness.
Do you trust your partner?
Trust is vital to a healthy relationship.
Dr. Michael McNulty, a master trainer
and certified Gottman relationship therapist
from the Chicago Relationship Center,
explained to Business Insider
about how important trust is in a relationship.
He explained, "Research tells us people only tend to move
from romantic flings into bonafide relationships
when they feel they can trust the potential partner."
Trust in a relationship is not only about transparency.
It's a sense of investment in the relationship.
It's a sense of commitment to one another.
It's a sense that both partners are true to themselves
while having each other's backs.
They're honest about what they want and need,
and committed to working through their differences
in ways that are fair to both of them.
Great advice.
So would you say you're a trustworthy partner?
Do you trust your partner?
Number three, kindness.
How kind are you?
A 2014 study from Yan Zhang of Huazhong University in China
published in November 2014 issue
of Personality and Individual Differences,
wanted to see just how much
the most positive personality traits
influenced their facial attractiveness.
The study had three groups of people rate the attractiveness
of 60 photographs of strangers
pictured with neutral facial expressions.
The researchers changed things up for the participants
weeks later when they had a group read out loud
positive attributes about those pictured.
Another group read negative attributes.
And then the control group had no attributes
paired with the photos.
The participants now rated
the strangers' attractiveness again.
While most people originally agreed
on who was the most attractive from the photos,
with the positive attributes, this changed.
Participants rated those with kinder descriptions
as more attractive.
Those with negative attributes,
subjects reported being turned off by them.
Their faces simply weren't as attractive anymore.
Big takeaway, be kind to others, and yourself.
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Number four, humbleness.
Remember marriage and family therapist Hal Runkel?
Well, he has some more advice for you.
Runkel explained to Business Insider
that, "We like people who can laugh at themselves
and yet still be comfortable in their own skin."
A little humility never hurt anybody, right?
Right.
But seriously, it's best to relax around your partner
and have a bit of humility.
Be humble.
Nobody likes someone who is constantly overbearing.
So be comfortable in yourself.
That's great, kid.
But as Han Solo once said, "Don't get cocky."
Number five, genuine interest in others.
Wouldn't you want your partner
to have a genuine interest in you?
Of course, you would.
It's time to actively listen to your partner
and be there for them,
as long as it's genuine interest, that is.
We're pretty good at spotting
when someone is coming off as disingenuous.
So if you find you're just not interested
in hearing what your partner has to say,
maybe they're not the right fit for you.
Or maybe you need to work on your listening skills.
Same goes for them.
Do they never have time to listen to you?
Not that attractive of a quality.
Being a great listener is one attractive quality
that is also important in any healthy relationship.
So next time you're on a date,
it's time to turn those ears on and listen up.
Your date's talking about how much they love "Star Wars."
Nah. Attractive.
And number six, self-awareness.
Are you self-aware?
It can be very attractive when someone
is self-aware of who they are
and how their actions and words affect others.
They can admit when they're wrong,
and take responsibility for their actions.
If someone is not self-aware of their wrongdoings,
or if they're immature,
they may become more defensive easily.
Those who can self-reflect on their actions in the past
know when they've done something wrong.
And they'll learn from their mistakes
then maturely apologize.
Self-aware partners thrive in their relationships
because they have an easier time
communicating with their partner in disagreements,
learning from their mistakes
and admitting when they're wrong.
So, are you self-aware, a great listener,
humble, trustworthy, vulnerable?
What traits and qualities
do you find most attractive in someone?
Feel free to let us know
in the comment section down below.
We hope you enjoyed this video.
And if you did, don't forget to click the like button
and share it with a friend, or someone you find attractive.
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And as always, thanks for watching.