I'm here at the Lucasfilm compound
at the Presidio in San Francisco.
This is a place where they literally manufacture
magic and wonder.
As you can see there's a statue of Yoda right here.
Yoda is 900 years old.
So as you can see, he has a bladder control problem.
Pee, I must.
(Star Wars orchestral music)
(audience cheering)
This is John Singh.
Hi John, how are you?
Hi, nice to meet you.
And you work here at Lucasfilm?
I do, welcome.
Here, we have some of the original costumes from the movies.
This is incredible.
Now this, I don't know a lot about Star Wars.
This is Darth Vader, is that correct?
This is Darth Vader, yes.
Looks like there's a retractable door here.
(audience laughing)
It does look like that, yeah.
You can just push,
I think it's this button and then
(imitating mechanical whirring)
(loud exhaling whoosh)
Yes, much better.
This is Jordan Schlansky.
Hi. He's a producer on our show.
Hi, Jordan. It's a pleasure.
How are you? Good to see you.
Jordan is our resident Star Wars expert.
Is that fair to say, Jordan?
Yes, sir.
Jordan, you have some problems
with this Darth Vader costume?
Well, I just noticed that John had said
that it was an original
and then I also noticed that the chest plate
doesn't have the Hebrew lettering
in these three areas that the original has,
which led me to believe that maybe it actually is a replica.
It probably is.
I see.
So earlier, when you said you think this is the original,
you were lying to me.
I was misinformed.
[Male Voiceover] Liar.
There's Darth Maul's lightsaber,
a double-bladed lightsaber.
And Darth Maul actually specializes in musical theater.
Is that right?
I'm gonna wow ya!
This is, he's a bounty hunter, I think I know that.
Yeah, very good, yeah.
And he has some braids from Jedi.
Oh, what's that all about? What is that?
Yeah, these are the braids from the Jedi that he's killed.
Jordan, do you know any inaccuracies
with the Boba Fett costume?
Well, John, the one thing that you mentioned that,
again I question, was you would call these Jedi braids.
I'd always heard of them referred to as Wookiee braids.
[Male Voiceover] Liar.
This is one of the operations that was used
in a shot for his chest.
Has he heard of Nivea cream?
Look at his arm.
For four million light-years, it's a long trip.
Okay, you just said four million light-years.
Yep.
Jordan, would you step in please?
How you doing?
Yeah, what is it?
It's actually six million light-years
from home E.T. traveled.
[Male Voiceover] Sad.
(audience laughing)
The original models and props,
even though this is from Dragon Slayer.
One of the other cool things we have
is one of the original whips used from Indiana Jones.
(suspenseful music)
(whip cracking)
Do you mind if I,
is it okay if I-- Sure, go ahead.
Yeah, look it. Oh, wow.
Look at that.
(whip cracking)
Whoa, did you hear that?
Look at that.
(whip cracking)
Ow, I just whipped myself in the back.
One of the original Imperial Walkers.
Oh, cool. Yeah.
These are so cool. Yeah.
Look at that.
I remember those walk.
Yeah, from The Empire Strikes Back.
Yeah.
(lasers shooting)
(jet whooshing)
I love the way these things were sort of just like--
Yeah.
(audience jeering)
I think this goes here.
No, you have the wrong one.
Problem is this part needs to go in here
to get that tab in.
I don't get this.
Pretty much there.
(audience laughing)
This is Industrial Light & Magic.
They're pretty much the biggest visual effects company
in the entertainment industry.
You mind if we come in for a sec?
No, don't mind at all.
This is our nerd corner here.
Nerd corner.
That's what we call it.
You said it, I didn't.
Hi, what is your name?
My name's Charles.
Hey Charles, really good to meet you.
What is this fan for?
This is,
this is so you never have to go outside
to experience a cool breeze. That's right.
It simulates an outdoor experience.
Simulates what it will be like
if you took 10 steps and walked outside.
Absolutely.
Kevin, is that correct? Kevin, yeah you're right.
I want to ask you quickly
about your professional wrestling figures.
Okay, yeah. What's that all about?
Basically, my folks just wanted them
to get out of the house.
[Kevin] Big John Studd. [Conan] Yes.
[Kevin] King Kong Bundy. [Conan] Yes.
And I was like, I'll take these.
I know exactly where they'll fit in great.
Were they worried that you have a vast collection
of men without shirts?
(audience laughing)
This is Maia, is that right?
Maia? Yes, Maia.
Which, Maia?
Kayser.
Maia Kayser.
Yeah. Let me ask you something.
What is the male to female ratio here?
I've walked around, the ratio is I think 800 to 1.
(audience laughing)
I just wanted you to meet my friend.
This is my friend Charles.
Hey. Hey.
I thought you two should meet.
Hey. Hi.
Hi. How're you doing?
(romantic music)
This is Mike Sanders, is that right?
That's correct.
What we're gonna do is turn this place into a virtual studio
and they're gonna alter the performance
of some digital creatures.
And to do that I need to get into a special...
It's a
humbling lycra suit.
Why you say humbling?
Well, we're gonna find out.
Perfect.
(dramatic trombone music)
This was a mistake.
We're gonna plug you right into
the first digital character we've got here.
It's a demo character we call The Schwa.
The Schwa. The Schwa.
Oh, here he is. Yep.
This is The Schwa right here.
So I am now The Schwa.
[Mike] Yep, exactly.
Is The Schwa been in any Star Wars movies?
No.
Okay, this is where The Schwa gets the phone call
that he's not good enough for Star Wars.
He's been cut.
(disguising voice) Wha- what?
No!
That's crazy!
I'm perfect for it.
What do you mean no?
What?
They think I have an eating disorder?
No, I'm fine.
I eat, I'm just,
I totally am right for that par-- oh, forget it.
Ugh.
Ah.
No, it's not right.
I'm calling back.
You got, get me a mirror.
What do you mean no?
Oh.
I'm calling again.
How about one of these characters from
the Star Wars episodes?
Great, an actual Star Wars character.
Yep. Cool, let's do that.
Oh cool, C-3PO.
Even I know C-3PO.
Rockettes C-3PO.
Is there a Star Wars film,
I haven't seen them all,
where C-3PO turns into a real badass?
No, I haven't seen that yet.
This is herniated disc C-3PO right here.
Too many martini C-3PO.
I'm okay.
Chewbacca's saying, you are right man,
you really,
you had a lot to drink.
No!
I'm okay.
(vomiting sound)
(coughing)
Let's put me on my set.
Let's see what that looks like.
Do C-3PO on your set.
(drumming music)
(audience cheering and clapping)
(drum beat)
You IML people are fantastic.
I thank you.
But before I leave this incredible place
there's something I must do.
Excuse me.
(dramatic suspenseful music)
Kevin.
Charles.
Come with me.
We're going outside.
(audience cheering and clapping)