- Today, we're gonna talk about three reasons
you can feel down or depressed this time of year,
and how to help yourself feel better.
If you feel the January blues
or just a little low after the holidays, you're not alone.
And why is it that year after year we see the same pattern,
that depression and suicide rates go up
after November and December?
What causes us to feel worse in January,
rather than during the holidays?
Experiencing seasonal depression at the start of a new year
is incredibly common.
Today I'm going to dive into the three most common factors
contributing to why our depression can feel worse
at the start of the new year.
Number one is disappointment, number two is family dynamics,
and three are seasonal cues.
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First, let's talk about disappointment.
Whether we realize it or not,
we may experience depression at the start of a new year
because we experience a level
of subconscious disappointment.
Now, let me explain a little bit about what I mean.
There's a powerful link between depression
and the gap between what we hope for
and what actually happens.
Now typically there's a lot of pressure or expectations
that the holidays will be happy
and full of family or friends.
And then we get to start a brand new year, yay,
and we can, even if we don't wanna admit it,
have hope that things will finally get better
or that we will feel better
and the new year will be a great one.
And when those expectations or hopes aren't clearly met,
we can feel deep disappointment or even despair
as January drags on.
Viktor Frankl was an Austrian psychiatrist
and psychotherapist and Holocaust survivor,
and in his book "Man's Search for Meaning,"
he describes a phenomenon that he witnessed.
And this is how he describes it, it's very powerful.
He said, "It was drawn to my attention by the chief doctor
"of our concentration camp.
"The death rate in the week between Christmas of 1944
"and New Year's of 1945 increased in the camp
"beyond all previous experience.
"In his opinion, the explanation for this increase
"did not lie in the harder working conditions
"or even the deterioration of our food supplies
"or a change of weather or new epidemics.
"It was simply that the majority of the prisoners
"had lived in the naive hope
"that they would be home again for Christmas.
"And as the time drew near
"and there was no encouraging news,
"the prisoners lost courage
"and disappointment overcame them.
"This had a dangerous influence
"on their powers of resistance
"and a great number of them died."
Again, I want you to know that it is common
to experience depression at the start of a new year
because our brains are processing a subconscious
or maybe even conscious disappointment.
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We could also feel depression more in January
because of family dynamics.
The holidays can force us to be around family members
that we don't usually see,
and spending time with them can force us to face
some family dynamics that may be painful or upsetting.
And the realization that our family may not be
what we thought it was
or that there are even a lot of toxic traits
that are woven into our familial relationships
can be hard to take.
Coming out of those scenarios can give us
more hopeless and helpless feelings.
And maybe this is because you had to face
that nothing has changed in your relationship
with your mom yet again,
or maybe it's because you had to celebrate the holidays
without a loved one,
or possibly you can now see that the way
your mom and dad talked to one another isn't that healthy,
and that your uncle is an alcoholic.
It could even be because you had an amazing time
with your friends and family,
and then you had to say goodbye
and you won't see them again for some time.
Whatever the case, as January rolls around,
we can find ourselves processing painful loss
and difficult dynamics that can give us
a sense of heightened depression.
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Lastly, seasonal cues can have us experiencing
a new or increased sense of depression in January.
And I have an entire video on seasonal affective disorder
that I'll link below, so I won't go into it too deeply here,
but even if we don't clinically experience
seasonal affective disorder,
fewer hours of daylight affects us on a psychological level.
Lower levels of sunlight impact our circadian rhythm,
our serotonin levels, and our melatonin levels,
meaning that our sleep cycle gets all messed up
and we just don't feel as happy as usual.
And the lack of regular sunlight can also lower
our vitamin D levels,
which can really impact our mood as well.
I know personally that during the winter months
when it gets dark at like 4:30 or 5 o'clock,
I am way less productive.
I get sleepy earlier in the evening and just feel more bleh.
Not to mention that when it's cold,
I'm not as apt to go out and spend time outside.
It's easier to bundle up and stay home,
which negatively affects my mood too.
And a few years ago, Sean was just not himself, you guys.
He was super sleepy, unmotivated, and just down.
And when we went in for our yearly physicals,
that's why it's so important to go in
for our yearly physicals,
he got his blood drawn and the blood results told us
that his vitamin D levels were incredibly low.
Like, the doctors were shocked at how low they were.
And after being on some intense vitamin D supplements
for a couple of weeks,
his energy and mood completely turned around.
So I know it's just a vitamin,
but it's extraordinarily important
when it comes to our mental health.
I know it seems so strange to think
that the weather is impacting our depression,
but we are impacted by seasonal cues.
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So what can we do today to feel better?
Here are three quick things you can do right now.
Number one, to manage any potential disappointment
that we may experience,
it's important that we take some time to recognize
or at least identify any of the expectations
that we have for the holidays, or really any time of year.
And you can answer these questions to help come up
with a more balanced thought or hope.
Number one, what's the best way
that this situation could go?
If everything goes just the way I want,
what would that look like?
And what could I expect out of this scenario?
Second group of questions, what's the worst case scenario?
What would it look like if everything goes wrong?
And third, what is the most likely scenario or outcome?
Given what I know about the people
and the situations involved,
what do I think would most likely happen?
And can I set my expectations with this in mind?
Taking the time to consider those questions
and really think about worst case, best case,
most likely case can stop us from really hoping
or setting these high expectations that are unachievable,
and also prevent us from falling in the pit of despair
and thinking that everything's just gonna go to shit.
Tip number two, dealing with family dynamics can be hard,
especially when we maybe don't see them all the time,
which is why it can help to prepare ahead.
Take some time to journal about the ways, you know,
each member of your family interacts.
What have you noticed over the years?
Is there a pattern you can see?
And then we can take all that information
and we can devise a plan for how to better deal with it.
We could consider ways in which we can respond
to keep us out of those old patterns.
Like, maybe we say no when we can't do something,
or let our family know that we can't stay over
for as long as we usually do,
or refuse to get into an argument with your uncle
about politics like you usually do.
Having a plan is always better than just winging it.
And third and finally,
when it comes to dealing with seasonal cues,
we need to get more sun on our faces.
And this could be through light lamps.
You just have to make sure that they're made to deal
with seasonal affective disorder and aren't just lights
or lamps of another kind.
Or we can even open a blind
so the sun can come through the window
and get onto our face.
And just try to do this at least 30 minutes a day.
Maybe when you have a break at work,
you can go for a walk around the block
or take one of your work calls outside if it's not too cold.
Finding ways to get more sunlight during these darker months
can prevent seasonal affective disorder
and keep us from slipping into a depressive state.
I hope you found that helpful.
If you have other ways that we can overcome depression
and suicidal thoughts,
please leave those in the comments down below.
Have a wonderful rest of your day,
and I will see you next time.
Bye.
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So letting family...
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Maybe woven into our...
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Thoughts, please...
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