Narcissist are never easy to deal with, but when you're dealing with gaslighting,
it's far more complicated than that. Today QueenBeeing.com,
I'm going to share with you 10 things narcissists say when they're gaslighting you and what those things really mean.
So let's get started. (Closed captioning provided by Athena Moberg and
CPTSDfoundation.org) My name is Angie Atkinson and on this channel,
I offer free, daily video coaching to help you discover, understand and overcome
narcissistic abuse and toxic relationships. I like to call it toxic relationship rehab. So that sounds good to you,
hit that Subscribe button and let's get going. So we're just gonna jump right into it,
but before we do
let me share with you a quick definition of
gaslighting, take a look. Gaslighting is a sneaky way that narcissists manipulate us in order to gain control over us.
It's very dangerous and it is a form of emotional abuse.
It basically causes us to question our judgment of even the tiniest things,the things we see in front of our own eyes and
essentially allows the narcissist to control us by making us dependent on their beliefs or their
perception, because we stopped trusting our own. Alright, let's do this. Number one;
"Why are you being so difficult?". What it really means is why are you not doing what I want you to do. Number two;
"You're abusive to me". What that really means is I feel like you're challenging my sense of superiority here.
I really want to guilt you into doing or saying exactly what I want
and that's the only way you're gonna get me to stop saying you're abusive, forget about the fact that I'm abusing you.
Number three; "How could you be so mad at that rude comments I made. I mean it really sucks -
you used to think I was funny". What that really means is how dare you not laugh at jokes that I make at your expense,
don't you know better?, you didn't give me the reaction I wanted and that makes this all your fault, now you're in trouble.
Number four; "You keep screwing up! This is outrageous!
How many chances do you expect me to give you before I ghost?. What that really means is I want you to do what I
say, but you keep doing something else".
So I'm gonna need to tap into your deepest human fear of the fear of being alone,
that way maybe you'll start doing what I want. Number five;
"I really thought you were the last guy or girl I was ever gonna be with." This is something else.
What that really means is I'm already cheating on you or at least considering it. Number six; "Everyone else thinks I'm amazing.
Why don't you?" What that really means is can't you just pretend like you haven't seen behind my mask. Number seven;
"Listen, I know what you think, but we just need to be on the same page here,
okay?"
What that really means is look I really don't care what you think, but I'm gonna pretend like I do for this moment, because I
just need you to think whatever it is that I think you should think. Number eight;
"You make it impossible to talk to you." What that really means is you just refuse to believe my lies
and I seriously hate that. Number nine; you really think I did that?, I'm shocked that you think I would do such a thing."
What that really means is how dare you see through the smoke and mirrors and see me for what and who I really am.
Don't you know I'm amazing and perfect. Wait, you know better?, Oh.
Number ten; Oh my God, see, this is why we can't talk. You're always yelling at me. Don't you see that
you're the real problem here, everyone says so." What that really means.
I've twisted your thoughts and your words and your feelings until you got frustrated and yelled at me.
That was my goal this whole time and now my feelings are hurt because you expect me to take responsibility for my own
behavior. This really is all your fault and everyone knows it because I tell them all the time.
I love the smear campaigns.
So there we have it, ten commonly uttered phrases of narcissists and translations in human English.
Now, how do you deal with somebody who's gaslighting you like this?. If you can't go
no
contact, gray rock is your next best option. Gray rock simply defined is just kind of being boring,
don't respond with any emotion, sort of acts like they are a really irate customer and you're a customer service representative
just trying to calm them down. You don't express a lot of emotion.
You don't express a lot of feelings or feeling words.
You simply do something like, oh that's very interesting that you say that or I'm not sure why you'd say that.
I'll leave some videos for you in the description below, on
that topic so that you can kind of learn how to better deal with
narcissists who are gaslighting you. Alright
now this brings me to the question of the day and the question of the day is;
Did any of these ring through for you?
and if so,
which ones and what would you add to my list of phrases that are commonly uttered by narcissists?.
Share your thoughts, share your ideas, syour experiences in the comments section below and let's talk about it.
Let me give a quick shout out to the entire SPANily, every single
Subscriber on this channel everyone who comes in and comments on my videos, every
who gives me likes and thumbs up and who shares my videos,
everyone in the SPAN groups on Facebook and all Facebook, I'm so grateful for each and every one of you,
thank you for being part of my life and part of my day,
It means so much to me and I just want to give a quick shout out to the inner circle who
support me through the YouTube channel member program.
Thank you all so much for being there for being part of my inner circle, for helping to support me as I try to support
our fellow survivors.
It does mean a lot to me and I really enjoyed our recent conversation. My inner circle includes; Charity. Steph.
Dana. MOCowboy. Shae. Kristina. Reyrey. T. Kristi. Beaucoup. Alda. Smith n Wesson.
Ms Lisa. Martha. Freedom Lee.
Mindy, Lynne. Marsha. Lanell. Phoenix. Cherie. Alice. Carie. Angel. Bible
News Radio. Linda. Charly. Laura. Pierlala.
Janet. Paul. Delilah. SarahLee. Marlene. James F.
Tricia. Lifes. Revival. Lorenzo. Deborah. Roxanne.
Susan and my very first supporter Angela Falsetta. Thank you.
Again, I just want to say thank you so much for hitting that join button. Your support really does mean a lot to me.
Again, thank you so much. Alright, that's all I've got for you right now,
but as always thank you so much for being a part of my day and a part of my life and hey,
thanks for letting me be a part of yours,
it really does mean a lot to me. Now before I go, make sure you take a look at the videos
I'm leaving for you right there and right there and
while you're here, hit that Subscribe button so we can stay connected and continue on this healing journey together. I'll see you soon.