Hey everybody. Happy Thursday!
And as promised today I'll be talking about back to school.
Back to school. And the funny thing is,
and I'm sure many people feel the same way I do.
I've been out of school long enough that I forget when this comes around.
But all of you remind me, so yeah!
Okay, so I asked on Twitter any questions you have about back to school
And I have one long question that I had pulled from I think the website,
but possibly Youtube.
For any of you who are trying to figure out how to get your questions answered,
I find them on YouTube below the Monday video,
before the Thursday that I answer.
So it would be my selective mutism video that I put out on Monday.
It would be below that.
Or on katimorton.com under the Q & A for videos.
And I'm in there usually on like a Wednesday or a Tuesday or both days
answering your questions and picking them out for today's video.
So I'll read the long question,
and then I have a couple other follow ups from all of you on Twitter.
So the question says "Hey Kati. In the theme of back to school, even though it's
the second half of the school year here. Do you have any tips on overcoming
stress and severe inability to concentrate when it comes to school.
My concentration levels are so bad and it's causing my grades to fall like crazy in
one of the most important years of high school. I also struggle massively with
stress which makes my concentration worse, if that was even possible.
And I just end up a complete mess. I'm almost in tears when a teacher's trying
to talk to me at school. I'm seeing a counselor and trying to work on my
stress, but I really need a quick fix idea before I fail.
How can I improve my concentration?"
Now there are a couple things about concentration.
Number one: It usually has a lot to do with how we're taking care of ourselves.
Are we sleeping enough?
Are we eating properly?
And by properly I mean, frequently enough, healthy, a variety of foods.
I don't like the term healthy, just a variety of foods that your body would need.
Are we doing that?
Are we maybe getting out and walking for like 30 minutes 3 times a week?
Maybe we need to take a little bit better care of ourselves.
The second is also being assessed to make sure there's not something else
going on. Many people struggle with ADD, ADHD.
And it could be a component of the anxiety .
We wanna make sure that we're getting the treatment that we need.
Also deep breathing can help when we're feeling panic,
and we're feeling the anxiety.
It's kind of something that you're gonna have to talk out with your therapist
a little bit more, because we need to know where this concentration
struggle is coming from.
Is it just from the anxiety or is something else going on?
And so I want you to consider all those things,
because when it comes to concentration a lot of it's how we treat ourselves.
Potentially getting treatment for something else.
Like I know with ADHD a lot of my clients medication is just a God send.
There's not much more that they can do.
That's really it, other than diet, exercise, you know getting enough sleep.
All that stuff.
And then there's also there component of making sure that your school knows
what's going on with you and advocating for yourself.
Telling them that maybe you need a little bit more time.
That you're really struggling with concentration.
Getting a letter from your therapist.
I've talked about that in a lot of videos, and I cannot say it enough.
Advocate for yourself. No one else is gonna do it. You have to do it.
Even as an adult, if I need something. If I want something I have to advocate
for myself. I have to fight for it.
Nothing just falls into our lap.
We have to fight for it.
So figure out what it is you need.
Talk to your teachers, talk to your counselor at school, talk to whoever
is in charge of student services and make sure that you're getting
the services that you need and deserve.
Okay. Now the other questions that I got are
How to not put so much emphasis on grades. And if the grades don't come out
exactly as we hoped, how do we move past that?
And I think a lot of that is self talk.
And that kind of black and white thinking, that all or nothing.
I have a video about that, and I'm gonna link it right here. Black and White Thinking
Because we don't have to get 100% in every class.
Not all of us are great at every subject.
I know I'm not. I did not enjoy, and this is really bizarre, I did not enjoy
a lot of my English classes until I had a really great teacher. I didn't really enjoy it.
I also never enjoyed math. Ehhh. And I didn't even use Statistics.
It's bullshit. I'm not in research. Why did I even need to know that?
But we're not all great in all of the subjects.
So know that.
We're all unique and wonderful, and that's what makes the world go round.
We don't need all engineers or all doctors.
We need a variety of people doing a variety of things.
So focus on the things you are doing well.
Know that you're doing the best you can.
And change that self talk.
Talk back to that voice that says 'You gotta do it all. Blablabla.
You're stupid if you don't get 100%.' Because it's full of shit.
We just do the best we can.
Okay, next question. 'How to deal with anxieties and pressure to do well.'
Like stated about, just now about the grades I think a lot of it has to do with
our own expectations that we place on ourselves.
Because I want you all to understand that if someone has can expectation
for you. It could be a parent, a teacher, a friend, another family member, a coach,
it could be any number of people.
I want you to know that you don't have to accept that. Okay?
You don't have to accept that. You only have to accept what you believe you need to.
So I want you to consider that.
I know that there's a lot of pressure to do well, but it's only the pressure that
you have to put on yourself. Just because people think you have to
do a certain thing, doesn't mean that you really believe that.
So I want you to take some time for yourself.
I want you to think about what's important for you.
And I want you to recognize what classes are important,
what things you wanna work on.
Is it that you'd like to put more emphasis into your art?
You'd like to put more emphasis into the music or sports or whatever.
Make sure that you're putting the pressure on yourself for things
that are actually important to you.
Okay and then how to deal with bullies.
Well, we ignore them.
And I know that that's hard.
And I know you wish it was simple. Like boom!
But we have to talk to people in charge who can protect us to some extent.
If it's getting dangerous and we're worried about getting hurt.
We have to distance ourselves from them.
Try to not be alone with them. Ever.
If you can hold it and not go pee, because you know that that jerk is in there, hold it.
If you can wait and talk to your teacher until everybody's left class,
so that the bully is out. And then you get to go to class on your own. Do that.
If you have to stay with your friends in a little group until they drop you at your class. Do that.
Whatever you can do to protect yourself.
Because usually I find bullies pick on people when they're by themselves.
And if we're just not by ourselves that much, that can kind of deter them.
Also reaching out to friends and to teachers and other people to make sure
that other people know what's going on.
And can be there for us and support us.
But bullies are just really unhappy people, and
I find if you just ignore them and don't give them any response,
they usually find someone else to pick on, because they want that response.
They want the face that's like ….
Or they want you to cry. Or they want you to scream.
Or they want you to fight back.
And I find if we just boooooo, don't give them any response.
They often get bored and move on.
And I know that it's hard, but it may be best for the school year if you start that
early and be done with it. Okay.
Thank you so much for your questions on Twitter and for the ones on YouTube and katimorton.com
And I will see you all on Saturday with the journal topic.
If you have a good journal topic put it below.
I love you all. I'll see you then. Bye!
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