>> Reggie: OKAY, YEAH, I THINK WE'RE LIVE, ARE WE LIVE?
OKAY.
>> James: GOOD EVENING LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WELCOME TO
DK DK.
>> Reggie: I THINK WE'RE LIVE ALL RIGHT.
>> James: WELCOME TO THE "LATE, LATE SHOW."
WE'RE SO HAPPY ARE YOU HERE.
LET'S MEET OUR GUESTS.
EMMY WINNING WRITER, PRODUCER, ACTOR, AND COMEDIAN WHO'S
BROUGHT US ENDLESS HOURS OF JOY WITH HIS TELEVISION SHOWS
"SEINFELD" AND "CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM," IT IS OUR GREAT
HONOR TO WELCOME TO THE SHOW, THE ONE AND ONLY, LARRY DAVID
IS HERE TONIGHT.
THERE HE IS.
MOW ARE YOU, LARRY?
>> OH, GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE.
I'M BUSY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
>> James: SEE, I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN, CAN I BE HONEST.
>> THIS IS AN INTRUSION, HONESTLY.
I'M RELAXING USM DON'T INTERRUPT A PERSON RELAXING.
>> James: YOU ARE COMPLETELY RIGHT.
CAN I BE HONEST.
>> IS THAT WHAT THEY DO IN THE U.K., THEY INTERRUPT RELAXERS,
HUH?
>> James: THIS IS MY THOUGHT, RIGHT, ALL DAY TODAY, WE DO THIS
DRESSING ROOM CHECK-IN, WE MUST HAVE DONE IT 3,000 TIMES WITH
GUESTS.
ON MY WAY IN TODAY I IMAGINED AND VISUALIZED LARRY DAVID DOING
IT AND I THOUGHT HE IS GOING TO [BLEEP] HATE THIS.
HE IS.
>> HE IS RIGHT, I HATE IT, IT IS TERRIBLY INTRUSIVE.
I'M NEVER DOING THIS SHOW AGAIN.
THAT'S IT!
GET RID OF THIS THING.
>> James: WE'LL LEAVE YOU TOO IT.
>> BYE.
>> James: LARRY DAVID, EVERYBODY.
THEY'VE BEEN HERE ALL WEEK WITH US CELEBRATING THE RELEASE OF
THEIR NEW ALBUM, "MUSIC OF THE SPHERES."
WE LOVE HAVING THEM HERE WITH US, IT'S THE ALWAYS WONDERFUL,
THE OUTSTANDING, COLDPLAY ARE HERE TONIGHT.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, AND THERE THEY ARE.
WOW.
LOOK AT THESE, HANG ON, WAIT, WAIT, WHAT, WHAT, WHAT IS
HAPPENING HERE?
>> WE GOT YOU SOME-- .
>> James: ARE YOU SURE YOU DIDN'T JUST STEAL THEM FROM THE
SHELF.
>> ABSOLUTELY NOT SWRZ ARE YOU BEING IS COMPLETELY HONEST.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
>> James: CAN WE IT TURN THE CAMERA AROUND.
>> NO, THE CAMERA IS BROKEN.
>> James: RIGHT, RIGHT, WELL, THAT IS-- THAT'S JUST-- IT'S NOT
A GIFT IF THEY ARE ALREADY MINE, THAT IS THE THING.
IT NOT A GIFT.
>> SORRY.
>> James: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THEY ARE HERE TONIGHT
WITH A GREAT PERFORMANCE, COLDPLAY, EVERYBODY.
SO I DON'T KNOW-- I THINK IT GOT CUT OUT OF THE SHOW RIGHT, ROB.
>> I THINK SO.
>> James: IT GOT CUT OUT OF THE SHOW, YOU DON'T KNOW THIS,
WE HAD A LONG TALK LAST NIEM, WE CUT IT OUT, I DON'T KNOW, TIMING
ISSUES OR PERHAPS NOT FUNNY.
BUT LAST NIGHT REGGIE DROPPED A BOMB, ABOUT DOZENA CAT'S
BIRTHDAY PARTY, I AND I WAS LIKE HOW DO YOU KNOW DOZA CAT AND IF
I'M HONEST I DIDN'T BELIEVE HIM BECAUSE SOMETIMES WILL TELL US
STUFF AND TAKE IT OUT OF THE LEFT SIDE OF HIS BRAIN.
SURE YOU HAVE, UP ON THE GRAM, THERE HE IS.
DRESSED AS A SAILOR.
AT DOZA CAT'S BIRTHDAY.
HOW WAS IT?
>> IT WAS SO GOOD, HE HAD THIS UNDERWATER THEME.
YEAH, IT WAS COOL, LIKE CAME IN, IT WAS PRETTY CASUAL.
WASN'T THAT FULL, JUST ALL OF HER FRIENDS THERE.
AND THE BEST PART WAS JUST, SHE CAME UP AND SHE WAS LIKE,
BECAUSE WE HAD BEEN TALKING FOR A LONG TIME.
>> James: BUT YOU NEVER MET.
>> NEVER MET, NO.
>> James: SO IT WAS JUST STRAIGHT UP BANTER.
>> JUST A LOT OF BAPTER.
IT WAS NICE, WE TRADED DUMB SILLY THINGS, SHE IS SO FUNNY.
AND SO I MET HER.
AND SHE WAS GREAT, THE BEST PART WAS LIKE HER JUST LIKE DANCING
ON THE DANCE FLOOR WITH THIS CIRCLE OF FRIENDS AND TOTALLY
GETTING DOWN AND HER CHOREOGRAPHER IS NEXT TO HER.
AND THAT GUY CAN MOVE.
AND EVERYBODY WAS JUST CELEBRATING HER AND HAVING SUCH
A GOOD TIME.
AND I HAVEN'T SEEN THAT IN SUCH A, AGAIN, A LONG TIME.
AND THERE WERE A LOT OF-- THERE.
>> James: BILLIE EILISH DRESSED AS A LOBSTER.
>> YES, SHE WAS.
ONLY HER EYELASHES.
>> James: DO YOU WANT ME TO CUT THAT?
(LAUGHTER) >> JUST THAT ONE JOKE, YEAH.
>> James: THERE IS NO WAY, THERE IS NO WAY WE'RE CUTTING
THAT.
>> Reggie: OKAY.
>> James: I HAVE READ THE MONOLOGUE, THAT MIGHT BE THE
BEST JOKE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO HEAR TONIGHT.
>> OH.
>> James: WELL, THERE WE GO.
>> IT WAS GREAT.
>> James: YOU AND THE DOZ DID YOU MAKE PLAN, LET'S MEET UP,
HAVE AN ABOVE GROUND PARTY.
>> I THINK SHE IS COMING TO MY SHOW TONIGHT WRZ WHERE IS YOUR
SHOW TONIGHT?
>> IT IS AT A PLACE CALL CANNED DYNASTY TYPE WRER OR IN
ENGLISH-- .
>> James: AND DOZA CAT IS LIKE I WILL COME DOWN.
>> YEAH.
>> James: ARE YOU GOING OUT WITH DOZA CAT.
>> NO, NO, NOT AT ALL.
SHE IS JUST LIKE REALLY AWESOME.
SHE IS COOL.
IT IS A TRIP, HER CHOREOGRAPHER CAME UP, HER MANAGER, WE WATCH
YOUR VIDEOS BEFORE WE GO ON STAGE.
I WAS LIKE, WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.
IT WAS CRAZY.
>> James: I AM ALL INTO IT, I LOVE IT.
>> SHE'S SO COOL.
SHE'S GOT IT ALL.
>> James: WHAT IS HER ACTUAL NAME.
>> I DON'T KNOW.
SHE INTRODUCED HERSELF-- .
>> James: DID YOU CALL HER DOZA.
>> I HAVE NEVER ACTUALLY CALLED HER-- .
>> James.
>> CAN WE SPEED THIS UP BECAUSE HAVE I TO DO KYLE KYLIE MINAJ'S
BAT MITZVAH.
>> YOU WERE IN THE NEWS ABOUT A POP STAR, ACTUALLY, WAS THAT
REALLY IN THE NEWS?
ARE YOU GOING AROUND COLLECTING POP STAR'S CHEWING GUM AND STUFF
LIKE THAT.
BECAUSE I SAW ADELE ON THIS VOGUE VIDEO.
>> James: I HAVEN'T SEEN IT IT BUT A COP ELF PEOPLE SAID, WHAT
DID SHE SAY.
>> THAT YOU GAVE HER LIKE HER FAVORITE GIFT HE SHE EVER
RECEIVED.
>> WE HAVE VIDEO.
>> James: YES.
>> ALL RIGHT.
>> SELL EVEN DION'S GUM-- CELION DIEN.
>> JAMES CORDEN, HE IS A FRIEND OF MINE, ALSO DID CARPOOL CARE
YOKEE, HE DID IT WITH HER, HE MADE HER SPIT HER GUM AND SAVED
IT FOR ME.
>> James: THAT IS TRUE.
THAT IS A TRUE STORY.
>> DID SHE JUST PULL IT OUT AND STICK IT ON A PIECE OF PAPER.
>> James: NO, NO, I TELL YOU WHAT, WHAT HAPPENED WAS THE
WEEKEND BEFORE WE HAD SHOT IT.
WE WENT ON A LITTLE-- WE WENT ON A WEEKEND AWAY TO MEXICO, MY
FAMILY, AVON, HER SON AND WE SPENT A WEEKEND TOGETHER.
AND THE FOLLOWING FRIDAY I WAS SHOOTING THE CARPOOL WITH CELINE
DEION AND ADELE LOVES HER, I WOULD ONLY GO OUT ON A LIMB
SAYING MORE THAN DOZA CAT LOVES REGGIE WATTS, IT IS LEAK A LOT,
OKAY.
SO WE, YOU KNOW, WE WERE TALKING ABOUT THAT, SHE WAS LIKE OH MY
GOSH, SHE IS AMAZING.
SHE MET HER ONCE, WAS STAR STRUCK BY HER, RARELY THAT
HAPPENS TO ADELE, YOU KNOW, SO WHEN WE ARE WERE IN THE CAR, I
THINK WE WERE JUST ABOUT TO GO, AND SHE HAD GUM IN HER MOUTH AND
SHE WAS LIKE WHAT CAN I-- AND IT IT WAS LIKE A QUICK THING-- A
THING IN THE BACK.
I ASKED HER, I RIPPED OFF A PEETION AND SHE PUT IT IN.
AND I SAID-- I WILL TAKE THAT, SHE WAS ABOUT TO DO THE FOLD.
>> I SAID I GOT IT, I GOT, I GOT IT, I THEN HAD TO GIVE IT TO I
THINK IT GAVE IT TO DIANAAN MILLER AND I WAS LIKE I NEED TO
KEEP THIS SUPER SAFE.
AND SHE TOOK IT AND LOOKED AT ME LIKE-- I THINK THIS IS THE DAY
HE LOST HIS MIND.
I THINK THIS IS IT.
AND I SAID PLEASE KEEP IT SAFE.
AND THEN I GAVE IT TO AVON FOR HER BIRTHDAY, A DIFFICULT PERSON
TO BUY FOR, A CANDLE DOESN'T CUT IT.
>> RIGHT.
>> AND CELINE DEION'S USED CHEWING GUM ISN'T LIKE AT
BLOOMINGDALES.
>> James: NO, BUT AFTER THAT VIDEO NOW THAT ITS HAD BEEN IN
ADELE'S POSSESSION AND CELINE'S DEION'S MOTH, AT SOME POINT I
WILL SEE THAT ON SOTHEBYS FOR LIKE $138,000, PASSIONED FROM
CELINEDION'S MOUTH TO ADELE'S HOME, AND I WILL BE LIKE-- WELL
LOOK, WE COULD BANTER LIKE THIS ALL NIGHT LONG.
I'D ENJOY THAT.
BUT YOU KNOW WHO WOULDN'T?
TE GREAT PEOPLE OF AMERICA WHO COULDN'T SLEEP UNTIL THEY GET
THE NEWS.
EARLIER TODAY, THE HOUSE VOTED TO HOLD STEVE BANNON IN CONTEMPT
OF CONGRESS, FOR IGNORING A SUBPOENA FROM AN INVESTIGATION
INTO THE JANUARY SIXTH ATTACK ON THE CAPITOL.
MARKING THE FIRST TIME ANYONE HAS EVER EXPRESSED A DESIRE TO
HOLD STEVE BANNON IN ANY WAY WHATSOEVER.
STEVE BANNON, OF COURSE, IS A LONGTIME ADVISOR TO DONALD TRUMP
WHO LOOKS LIKE WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF NICK BERNSTEIN SPENT THE NEXT
TWENTY YEARS LIVING EXCLUSIVELY ON BOURBON AND CIGARETTES.
AND DID EVERYONE SEE THIS?
DONALD TRUMP JUST ANNOUNCED THAT HE'S LAUNCHING A NEW SOCIAL
NETWORK.
AND HE'S CALLING IT, TRUTH SOCIAL.
IT'S THE PERFECT SITE FOR THE PERSON WHO HAS ALWAYS WONDERED,
"WAT IF TWITTER WAS ONLY THE IN A PRESS RELEASE, TRUMP
EXPLAINED THE NEED FOR HIS NEW SOCIAL NETWORK.
"WE LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE THE TALIBAN HAS A PRESENCE ON
TWITTER, YET YOUR FAVORITE AMERICAN PRESIDENT HAS BEEN
SILENCED."
I DON'T THINK TRUMP'S MAKING THE POINT THAT HE THINKS HE IS.
ALL HE'S TELLING US IS THAT HE'S MORE OFFENSIVE THAN THE TALIBAN.
AGE DOES EVERYONE THAT SHALTER TELEPHONE, THIS THING, THAT IS
NOT THE TOY THAT YOU REMEMBER, THAT IS ACTUALLY A NEW ADULT
VERSION.
FISHER-PRICE IS SELLING A CHATTER TELEPHONE FOR A DULS
THAT CAN ACTUALLY MAKE PHONE CALLS.
IT COMES WITH A BATTERY AND BLUETOOTH INSIDE.
WHICH IS ONE WAY TO LET YOUR BOSS KNOW
KNOW YOU'RE NOT READY FOR A PROMOTION.
AND THAT'S THE NEW, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH LARRY DAVID.